WTFUDLS 04

Chapter 04

In the past, when someone showed interest in her, Noeul used to rationalize little steps closer. “Two people can go to a café just as friends.” “I don’t think of him as more than a friend.” “I know women don’t like unattractive guys.” “I really don’t feel anything.”

While telling herself those things, she’d secretly savor the faint sweetness of it.
But the price for those tiny sips of sweetness was always bitter.
Before she knew it, Noeul would develop feelings for the guy, and everyone knew how that story ended.

Now she no longer lets herself be tempted by those breadcrumb-sized lures.
She knows too well how much pain comes from reaching for a few crumbs.
So she decided to cut things off at the root.
There was no need to think badly of Ji-woo or resent her.
She just needed to treat Ji-woo as if she didn’t exist—erase her from the heart.

Sitting alone in class, Noeul already felt the relief.
She could focus entirely on the lecture.
No ripples in her heart.
This was the usual Noeul.
This was right.

“Let’s end here for today.”

The professor left through the front door.
Noeul packed her bag.
Would Ji-woo come looking for her?
Ask to have lunch together?
Suggest another trip to the PC café like yesterday?
Her eyes faced forward, but her attention was fixed behind.
She slung her bag over her shoulder and stood.
Out of the corner of her right eye, she caught Ji-woo approaching.
Noeul strode quickly toward the door.

“Han Noeul.”

Ji-woo’s voice called after her, but Noeul acted as if she hadn’t heard and stepped out.
The hallway was crowded with students on their lunch break.
Blending into the crowd, she left the building.

Bzzz—

A message.
From Ji-woo.

If I’d known your eyesight was bad, I would’ve sat up front with you ㅠ

Did Ji-woo really think of her only as a close friend?
This “close friend” dynamic probably existed because Noeul kept dodging and running.
Because Ji-woo was sure Noeul had no feelings for her, Ji-woo could be so casually affectionate.

Maybe Ji-woo truly had no hidden intentions.
But that didn’t matter.
What mattered was that every little thing Ji-woo did swayed Noeul.
And Noeul hated that.
After about ten minutes she replied:

Ah, I thought you didn’t like the front row lol.

Not replying at all was dangerous—it would only signal that she was upset and draw more attention.
She needed to avoid Ji-woo while making it seem like coincidence, as if nothing was wrong, so Ji-woo wouldn’t try harder.
If they just kept missing each other, things would eventually settle back to normal.

Bzzz—

Another message?
Noeul checked.

Tonight, 7 p.m., Cheongjeok. You in?

It was from Hyun-su, a classmate.
A flash of disappointment flickered through her before she brushed it off.

Ok.

Whenever it was a drinking get-together, she accepted without asking who’d be there or what they’d eat.
She’d built an image as someone who liked drinking and hanging out so people felt at ease around her.
An unattractive girl who’s picky would only be mocked.

Bzzz—

Heard you’re coming to Cheongjeok too ㅎㅎ See you later.

Ji-woo.
Noeul stiffened.
If she’d known Ji-woo was going, she wouldn’t have agreed.
But backing out now would look like she was avoiding Ji-woo on purpose.
That couldn’t happen.
Ji-woo must never think she affected Noeul’s decisions.
So Noeul sent a fox emoji drawing a circle above its head.

“ Noeul! Noeul!”

Hyun-su waved from a table.
Noeul waved back.
In bright daylight, not many people called her name loudly, but drinking parties were different.
Everyone wanted to sit at Noeul’s table—she always brought good vibes.
Even when it looked like chaos, there was a silent competition among tables to be the most fun.
Here, Noeul’s value was actually pretty high.

“You’re here?”

Jun-gi from the next table greeted her.
He seemed the same as ever, unconcerned about her trip to the PC café with Ji-woo.

At drinking parties, the difference between Noeul and Jun-gi was clear:
Noeul had to keep cracking jokes, while Jun-gi could stay silent and still be valued.
Girls didn’t openly rush to sit next to Jun-gi, but they lingered nearby waiting for a spot, offering flimsy excuses when they finally sat—coming back from the restroom, bumping into friends, whatever.
It made Noeul smirk inwardly, though outwardly she played along.
A plain-looking girl with quick eyes gains nothing by showing it.
Better to be the harmless one who laughs and agrees.

While she was thinking that, a group of girls entered, naturally flocking to Jun-gi.
Then Ji-woo walked in.
Noeul casually popped a piece of popcorn into her mouth as if she hadn’t noticed.

“Wow, so many people tonight.”

Ji-woo slipped into the seat right beside her.
Noeul abruptly stood.

“Hold on—this seat’s impossible to get out of. Like a fish farm pen. Byeong-jun, switch seats with me.”

Byeong-jun blinked, then, spotting Ji-woo, brightened.
“Oh, sure. Let’s switch.”

Ji-woo watched as Noeul moved to another table, but Noeul ignored her gaze.
Passing Jun-gi’s table, Noeul said,
“Hye-mi, you smoke, right? You’ll never get out from there. Automatic no-smoking zone. Jun-gi, swap seats with her.”

Hye-mi stood, and Jun-gi shot Noeul a playful you sly thing look.
Noeul smiled faintly, feeling Ji-woo’s eyes on her the whole time, then kept walking to the farthest table.

The drinks kept coming and drinking games began.
Noeul entertained everyone with funny stories.

“Han Noeul!”

Someone called her name.
Everyone turned.
It was Ji-woo.
The startled, confused looks around meant this wasn’t good.

“What is it?” Noeul asked.

Hyun-su answered for her.
“Ji-woo wants you to be her Black Knight.”

Ah.
When a woman asks a man to be her “Black Knight”—someone to down a drink for her—friends usually howl and cheer.
But not now.
The guys looked uneasy, unsure how to react.
Even teasing her would have been better than this awkwardness.
This was the worst: when her plain looks made the atmosphere heavy, when they became an object of pity.

Was Ji-woo getting back at her for ignoring her in class?
Ji-woo simply smiled, unreadable.

“Okay,” Noeul said.

She walked over and picked up the glass in front of Ji-woo.
A hush threatened to fall.

With a serious face she announced,
“Black Knight needs a Black-Black Knight! Any volunteers?”

“Ha! Look at this guy flipping the script.”

Laughter and mock jeers broke the tension.

“I knew I could count on my best friend,” Noeul said dramatically, passing the glass to Jun-gi.

Jun-gi pretended to protest but drank it down as the crowd whooped.

Noeul laughed along, but when her eyes met Ji-woo’s, Ji-woo wasn’t smiling.
Something about that look made her chest tighten as she returned to her seat.

She kept joking and talking, but thoughts of Ji-woo’s expression lingered.
Was she really upset?
…No, probably just acting for effect.
Maybe annoyed her plan to embarrass Noeul backfired.
Forget it. Don’t think.

Bzzz—

A message.

I want a grape Emong.

From Ji-woo.
Noeul glanced over; Ji-woo’s cheeks were flushed from drink, looking even prettier, cuter than usual.
Her heart thumped and she quickly looked away.

Bzzz—

Let’s go buy some together.

Noeul stared at the message, not sure if she was sobering or getting drunker.

“Hey, why are you staring at your phone? You never get texts. Tell us another funny story,” a classmate slurred.

Noeul chuckled. Right. This is normal.
She shook off the brief fantasy Ji-woo’s message had sparked and asked the table,
“I’m heading to the convenience store—want anything?”

“Peach popsicle!”

“Glutinous rice ice cream for me!”

Standing, Noeul announced loudly,
“Text me what you want, I’ll grab it.”

“You buying?”

“Send me the money. Hyun-su, come with me.”

She left without looking Ji-woo’s way.

“Hey, make sure he gets back to the dorm without face-planting!”

“Yeah, see you next week.”

A few classmates were already throwing up on the curb.
Noeul pulled out her phone to call a taxi when someone tugged her sleeve.
Ji-woo stood there, eyes glazed.

“Where are you going?” she asked slowly.

“Me? …Why?”

“…What do you mean, why?”

“…Where are you going?”

“Seogok-dong.”

That was Noeul’s direction too.
She hesitated, then looked around.
“Wow, they’re so wasted. I’d better call taxis for them first.”

“What? Why you?”

Ignoring her, Noeul bent over a friend slumped against a pole.
“Hey, Byeong-jun. Open your eyes. Your place is Hwawon-dong, right?”

She ordered a taxi through the app, then turned to Ji-woo.
“I’m sending everyone off first. Want me to call you one? You said Seogok-dong, right?”

Ji-woo just stared at her, incredulous.

“Called one. Number 3946. Hop in when it comes.”

“……”

“Now, where did Jun-gi disappear to….”

“Hey.”

“…Yeah?”

Ji-woo’s glare made Noeul flinch inside, though she kept her voice even.

“What are you doing?”

“…Doing what?”

“……”

Ji-woo kept staring silently.
Just then taxi 3946 pulled up.
Ji-woo let out a small sigh and got in.
Noeul watched the car until it merged into traffic and disappeared.

She exhaled. Why? Ji-woo probably asked because she truly didn’t know—didn’t understand the effort someone unattractive must make to protect their own heart.

Tonight she’d done well.
Kept her image.
The best image an “ugly” person could manage.
Even she thought she’d handled it skillfully.

And yet her chest felt tight.

I should buy some beer on the way home.

Who could understand this—the feeling of having to dry out a sprouting seed of emotion?
Other people water theirs and watch flowers bloom and bear sweet fruit.
But she mustn’t.
Her flowers would be like a corpse flower, reeking and repulsive.

“Han Noeul.”

She turned.
Hansol stood there in a crop top and denim shorts, leaning against the wall, clearly drunk.
Why call her?
Noeul wasn’t pleased—Hansol was beautiful, and Noeul didn’t want to look at beautiful people right now.
But she hid her feelings and asked,

“What is it?”

Hansol’s blue-tinted contacts glimmered as she stumbled closer.
In heels, she was almost Noeul’s height.
Leaning in so no one else could hear, Hansol whispered through a haze of alcohol,

“You like Ji-woo, don’t you?”

END