~Chapter 46~
Eileen carefully took the dagger with the bent handle.
“It’s lighter than I thought…”
“Right?”
“It was a gift from my father when I was little. Be careful, it’s sharp. You don’t want to cut yourself.”
The handle had some signs of wear, but it was well maintained overall. Since it was from the previous Duke Lowell, it was clear Cedric treasured it.
“But, is it okay for you to give this to me?”
“I don’t need it anymore.”
“What if I lose it?”
“With your personality, you’ll never lose it. If you do lose it, it would probably be because you were trying to defend yourself, and then it’s already done its job.”
Eileen found it difficult to meet Cedric’s gaze as he spoke so calmly. His words felt as if he was saying it with a deep sense of care and responsibility.
“It’s okay, just hold it properly this time.”
Eileen stood there awkwardly, holding the dagger, and Cedric moved to sit beside her.
“Don’t hold it so awkwardly. Grip it like this. Put some strength into it.”
“Like this?”
“No, like that you’ll drop it.”
Cedric gently placed his hand over hers, covering it completely. His familiar warmth gave Eileen a sense of stability.
“With this grip, even with your skill, you won’t kill someone. So, think of it as a distraction to escape, not as a weapon to use.”
“You want me to stab them and escape while they’re shocked?”
“Exactly. Think of it as buying yourself some time. But ideally, you won’t need to use it.”
Cedric’s words carried a strong sense of determination to protect her. Eileen smiled softly.
“You can’t always protect me, Cedric.”
“Why not? I can do it if you stay by my side.”
Since the incident, Cedric had been a little more anxious than usual. It made sense; after all, the assassins had been taken care of, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of uncertainty.
“As long as they’re not completely stupid, they won’t use the same method to hire assassins again.”
Eileen finished her thought with a brief chuckle, but before she could end the conversation, Cedric blocked her attempt to lower her hand, looking at her seriously.
“Still. Once you leave the castle, promise me you won’t be alone.”
“I promise.”
Eileen nodded willingly. She didn’t want to die either, after all.
But Cedric’s expression remained troubled.
But Cedric still seemed uneasy.
Thinking back, Cedric had reacted quite sharply to some things the Duke’s knights had handled. Even when something seemed like a simple mistake, Cedric’s reaction was unexpectedly sharp.
‘Why didn’t they capture him, though? The assassin was just one person.’
The knight had reported:
“Sorry. The person was armed, and we thought we might miss him.”
“…Next time, be more careful. There should never be such incidents.”
It was understandable why Cedric was worried. After the large-scale rebellion of the Finikel family, there had been no direct threat to the Lowell family’s power. The recent attack had caught them off guard, and with no clues left behind by the assassins, identifying the mastermind was difficult.
“Have you found out who was behind the assassins?”
“We’re questioning the places they might have passed. The search teams should bring news soon.”
“That could take months.”
Eileen rubbed her neck absently, remembering the cold sensation when the dagger touched her skin.
‘Something feels… off.’
Thinking about it made her uneasy, as though she had missed something important. She was the one who faced the assassins, and she felt like there was something she should remember.
“Let me handle it. Stop thinking about it.”
That’s when darkness suddenly clouded her vision, and she heard Cedric’s gruff voice.
“I wasn’t thinking much, but…”
“You clearly looked like you were deep in thought about who was behind it, though.”
“I was just thinking since I was there.”
“Exactly. Let me handle this.”
There wasn’t much to leave to chance anyway. Eileen knew that in the north, she had no ability to do much. If it were in the capital, things would be different, but here, she relied entirely on Cedric.
‘Maybe that’s why…’
She probably agreed to Lord Rotner’s request because she felt frustrated. Maybe it was just that simple.
“Everything, even protecting you, I’ll handle it.”
“Alright, can you let go of my hand now?”
Eileen tried to pull away from Cedric, but a brief struggle followed.
“I don’t want to.”
“Stop being childish, Cedric.”
“You shouldn’t keep doing things alone.”
“You make me do it.”
“Is everything my fault?”
“Of course.”
“You showed up at the Duke’s house without saying anything, even though I told you to wait for my message?”
Cedric almost hugged her, blocking her vision, and when she turned her head, their faces were nearly touching. Eileen could see the closeness in his eyes and felt something stir inside her.
She had never seen Cedric this close, and for a moment, she felt like he could read all her thoughts and emotions.
Cedric’s heart raced as Eileen’s hand brushed his chest.
“…I was worried about you.”
She had been trying to shift her position, but Cedric misunderstood and became more flustered. Eileen could feel his heartbeat speeding up, and she realized that her own heart was racing too.
“Are you okay? You don’t look alright.”
“I’m fine,” Cedric barely managed to answer, almost as if he was afraid she would think otherwise.
“I’ll leave first. I need to get ready.”
Eileen quickly turned and walked away, her hair brushing Cedric’s face.
The sweet scent of something, likely from the snacks Diana had been making lately, suddenly reached Cedric’s nose. He instinctively bent his head to catch the scent but stopped himself.
Thud, thud. His heart kept pounding loudly. He felt his mouth go dry, unsure of why this was happening.
The feeling lingered even after Eileen had left.
***
It was almost winter, the time before the snowstorm came. They had to move quickly and return soon, or they could get trapped in the blizzard.
That was the reason Eileen and Cedric left the next day.
“Don’t cause any trouble. Take care, Diana.”
“I’m fine without you.”
Diana waved them off, surprisingly calm, though her eyes were slightly red. She almost spoke to Eileen but stopped herself.
They had become quite close in just a few days, but Diana was still hesitant around Eileen, unsure of how to act.
Eileen noticed this hesitation and waved Diana closer.
“I’ll teach you how to embroider properly when I come back.”
“Really?”
“Of course. You wanted to learn how to embroider names.”
Diana wasn’t very skilled in noble etiquette, but Eileen saw potential. She assumed the previous Duke Lowell was like Cedric, and given the lack of a noble figure, it made sense Diana hadn’t learned much.
‘Maybe these lingering negative feelings towards me will finally be resolved this way…’
Diana seemed to be constantly comparing herself to Eileen. It was almost instinctual.
“I’ll keep an eye on things and make sure everything is fine.”
“I’ll trust you.”
“Good. I’ll make sure there are no problems.”
Diana nodded enthusiastically, but Eileen noticed Cedric rolling his eyes.
As Cedric helped Eileen into the carriage, he spoke up.
“My uncle will handle maintaining the family’s reputation.”
“Of course, but Diana should know she has things she can do too.”
“Like embroidery?”
“That’s just a small thing. She might want to learn more interesting things.”
Eileen turned to Cedric, speaking softly but with purpose.
“Diana’s world has always revolved around you. It’s time to let her see other things. It’s not good for someone to be the center of everything in someone else’s life.”
Cedric fell silent after hearing those words. He didn’t speak for a long time, deep in thought.
