You Died –
Chapter 034……………………………………….
The safest place.
I spoke to Alec.
“Commander. Please tell the knights that they’ll be staying here.”
“Will you be all right?”
“Of course.”
“…Understood.”
As Alec walked off toward the knights, Raymond looked at me and let out a soft chuckle.
He studied me as if weighing me. In my gaze as I looked back at him, there was guilt.
“Saintess, are you comfortable camping here?”
At his voice, I erased the past from my mind and looked around.
It was no different from a wasteland, but from where I stood, I couldn’t see either monsters or those who had gone out to fight them.
My eyes returned to Raymond.
He wasn’t the only one waiting for an answer. Cardin was also looking down at me.
“There’s no other option, and you said this is the safest place, so we should follow that.”
Raymond spoke as he bent slightly at the waist, as if joking.
“Do you truly believe that a place where monsters appear is the safest?”
Without realizing it, I glanced sideways at Cardin.
Clearing my throat, I avoided his gaze and spoke.
“If that’s what you said, then I should believe it. And with the two of you here, it does feel reassuring.”
Mischief was written all over Raymond’s face.
He brushed his chin and looked past my shoulder toward the grand duke.
“Is that why you rode in on the grand duke’s horse as well?”
The holy knights were behind us and couldn’t see me, but it seemed Raymond had seen me in Cardin’s arms.
Embarrassed, heat rushed to my face again.
As I pressed my lips together, choosing an answer in my mind, Cardin stepped in front of him.
“That’s enough of the unnecessary talk.”
“Haha. I was just curious. My apologies.”
I forced a smile and shook my head.
“No, it’s fine.”
I withdrew my gaze from them and glanced back. Alec was still talking with the knights.
It felt like I was the only one sensing the awkwardness in the air.
“Ah. I’ve already prepared a place for you to stay, Saintess.”
Cardin’s eyebrows twitched, as if this were news even to him.
“Really? Thank you.”
“I’d like to guide you there now, but first, it seems you’ll need to go to the village.”
At Raymond’s words, I swallowed hard. They reminded me why I had come here.
A place that needed me.
“Where are the injured?”
“They’re gathered in one area of the village.”
“May I ask you to guide me there?”
Raymond glanced at Cardin once, then grinned and nodded.
I thought I would go with Raymond, but once again, I was in Cardin’s arms.
Since it was Raymond’s turn to take command, I ended up staying with Cardin again.
It couldn’t be helped, but I nervously bit my lower lip.
It hadn’t even been a full day, yet somehow I’d already spent so much time with him here.
“Am I getting in the way of your work because of me?”
“No. This is the time His Highness the Third Prince is in charge.”
That reassured me a little.
At least I wasn’t a burden.
I rested one cheek against his chest and quietly looked down at his large hand holding the reins.
“I should learn how to ride a horse, in case I come back again later.”
For a moment, his hand twitched.
“You’re planning to come here again?”
“If this place needs me.”
Regardless of the fact that you and Raymond are here—if I’m needed here, then anytime.
Cardin didn’t answer.
“Grand Duke.”
“Yes.”
“Are you close with His Highness the Third Prince?”
He paused briefly.
“We’re not particularly close.”
Just from that moment of hesitation, I could tell they were close.
“I see.”
Many thoughts passed through my mind, even though the wind wasn’t blowing toward me.
We rode on in silence.
When we arrived at the village, I couldn’t close my mouth. Homes destroyed by monsters were so badly damaged that people couldn’t possibly live in them right now.
It was shocking. I wondered what I had even been on a pilgrimage for, leaving places like this behind. My hands trembled finely.
Cardin brought the horse to a stop and looked down at me.
“This is the first time monsters have come down this far. We didn’t know, so we couldn’t prepare, and this happened.”
Whether it was meant to comfort me or not, that’s how it sounded.
“There were rarely any injured to begin with. When casualties occasionally occur due to monsters, it’s usually people who went to gather flowers.”
I looked up at him.
“Flowers…?”
“That place.”
It was like a wasteland.
The direction toward the forest was different. When I made a puzzled expression, he swept his gaze over the village and continued.
“There’s a story that where monsters appear, there’s a flower of the god. It’s like an old oral tradition passed down in this village.”
“The flower of the god?”
“Yes.”
I’d never heard of it. A flower of the god—and even if it existed, monsters wouldn’t live in such a place.
Perhaps he was thinking the same thing, because he added,
“It’s a ridiculous story.”
“So the flower doesn’t exist after all?”
“When we found the casualties, we didn’t see anything like that.”
People who risked such danger on uncertain information. And people who never returned.
“They must have been desperate. Most people living on the border are former slaves.”
Though slavery had been abolished, they had fled places that were like hell to come all the way here.
“If you get sick here, it’s too far to reach a clinic, and even if you do, you don’t have the money for treatment. So they cling to even stories like that. When a family member is sick, they probably risked everything, grasping at straws.”
“Desperate…”
I kept repeating the word. A bitter laugh escaped, directed at myself.
Cardin dismounted first and stared straight at my face.
When I turned my head to the side to hide my expression, he extended his arm just like before.
“I only learned this recently as well. I haven’t been in charge of this place for long, and at first, I didn’t pay any attention to this matter.”
“……”
“Thanks to you, I was able to recall something I had forgotten too.”
Tears welled up in my eyes.
The surging tide hung precariously at the corners of my eyes.
“…Your comfort is too sweet.”
Without even realizing that tears were falling, I laughed because his comfort was so sweet.
I reached out both arms toward him. Cardin, just as before, wrapped his arms around my waist.
The arms I had looped around his neck slowly loosened when the tips of my shoes touched the ground. I stepped back slightly, putting a little distance between us.
Cardin rummaged through the inside pocket of his jacket. I had a feeling I knew what he was looking for, and my eyebrows twisted reflexively.
Just as I expected, he was holding a handkerchief.
Instead of handing it to me right away, he bent forward slightly.
As our eye levels came nearly even and I didn’t know what to do, he carefully wiped away my tears.
I froze at the gesture.
The Cardin who had always waited on the other side of a door until my tears stopped was now standing in front of me, wiping them away himself—it felt strangely unreal.
He dabbed gently, pressing lightly so the tears wouldn’t fall. The touch was incredibly soft.
Why is it that the only person who can show me this side… is you again?
“It really is sweet.”
It felt like having a piece of candy melting in my mouth. Like a crying child smiling after tasting something sweet, I found myself smiling too.
Even as I worried about what he might think of me laughing while crying, the sweetness of his comfort kept the smile from fading.
He continued until my tears finally stopped. True to himself, Cardin didn’t avert his eyes and kept looking straight at me.
As always, the fact that my heart was pounding like crazy at this moment was probably mine alone.
With a rather firm expression, Cardin said,
“The handkerchief.”
“Yes?”
“Even if I say I’ll come to retrieve it myself…”
“……”
“…Will you send it back again with a formal letter?”
My eyes widened beyond my control.
I hadn’t thought he’d even considered that. Even more so, I never expected him to say it so directly.
I couldn’t bring myself to answer that I wouldn’t.
Taking my silence as affirmation, he nodded briefly and slipped it back into his inner pocket.
“Then I suppose I’ll have to keep it. Let’s go.”
