You Died –
Chapter 30……………………………..
Doubts began to creep into my pilgrimage.
Philip rose from his seat the moment the meeting began and walked to the front. Handing a set of documents to Fabivan, he spoke.
“I’ve organized a list of the countries that attended His Holiness the Pope’s funeral mass.”
“Heh heh. You’ve worked hard, my young cleric. Thank you.”
I had heard that the High Priest had told Philip to prepare the materials. Philip was gradually taking on tasks, telling the High Priest about me as he did.
Fabivan smiled with clear satisfaction as he skimmed through the documents. They were packed with the names of countless nations, yet even at a glance it was obvious how neatly they had been organized.
He lowered his head and returned to his seat.
“I’ll take a moment to review these documents. Please proceed with the meeting at your leisure.”
At his words, the cardinals cleared their throats and began to speak.
“Ahem. As I mentioned in the previous meeting, invitations are pouring in from all kinds of kingdoms and empires alike.”
“This is also an opportunity to show the Saintess’s face to the world, so how about an official banquet where all the nobles can gather, like last time?”
“Are you referring to an appointment ceremony or a founding anniversary?”
“Yes, exactly.”
“Well, that would certainly be the safest option.”
“There’s a banquet being held by the Western Empire this time. What do you think?”
“Hm, as far as I recall, it’s neither the emperor’s birthday banquet nor the crown prince’s appointment ceremony. Is there really a need to attend?”
“They did send an envoy to the funeral mass. And it is an empire, after all.”
“Putting aside how far away it is, it’s a birthday banquet for the Second Prince, who has the weakest power among the princes. He’s not the crown prince, either.”
“But under imperial law, doesn’t any prince have the qualification to become crown prince? Especially since there’s no crown prince decided right now. Wouldn’t it be good to build ties in advance?”
“Hah. If we do that, people will start saying the Melissa Temple supports the Second Prince.”
Had I attended that banquet?
I searched through my memories. The first time I visited that place was much later—after the Second Prince had brutally killed his brothers in a succession struggle, murdered his own father, and ascended the throne.
I hadn’t known until I arrived. I had only been told it was the emperor’s coronation ceremony. During the banquet, I was following the cardinals’ instructions, bestowing blessings even upon the emperor’s close aides, and was on my way down—
When the doors of the banquet hall opened, servants who had served the other princes were all dragged in, bound. The emperor ordered them to be taken to prison.
Told by the cardinals not to interfere, I hid alone on a balcony. It was while listening to a conversation drifting over from the neighboring balcony that I learned the truth.
Back then, I had been too terrified to come out and stayed hidden until the cardinals came to find me.
“I heard the Second Prince is sickly.”
That, at least, was a lie.
After he married and I discreetly looked into it, I heard that tyranny erupted there after the Second Prince took the throne.
As I listened in silence, the topic shifted again.
“Then what about the Evanto Empire, which I mentioned before?”
“As I said then, the Evanto Empire is currently in a territorial war. We must not involve ourselves in war.”
“Even so, is there another nation as powerful as Evanto?”
Philip, who had been quietly recording the meeting, raised his hand.
“Excuse me for interrupting, but the Evanto Empire does not worship Lady Gloria.”
At his single remark, the room fell silent.
Before long, Fabivan’s close associates brought up the Kingdom of Conrand.
It was the path that had already been decided.
They continued, emphasizing that it was a founding anniversary—not a succession dispute or a war—and people gradually tilted like puppets on a stage that had already been set.
That was when Harold, who had maintained his silence, clicked his tongue.
“I don’t understand why you keep thinking only about forming ties with nations when it comes to the Saintess’s pilgrimage. Wasn’t a pilgrimage originally meant to go where blessings are needed?”
At Harold’s words, I realized something again. A Saintess’s pilgrimage was not merely a tour of events.
I had been thinking about changing this place, yet I hadn’t thought to change that first. It was the most basic thing.
I had been lacking as a Saintess back then, and that hadn’t changed even now.
But now I had people who would help me, and I had the will to act—so for now, I took comfort in that.
“His Excellency is right. When I first heard about the pilgrimage from the High Priest, I was told that a pilgrimage meant going to places where the Saintess’s power is needed and granting blessings there.”
When I looked at Fabivan, he lifted one corner of his lips and nodded.
“Yes. You remember well. Do you have a direction in mind, Saintess?”
“To be honest, there’s still a lot I don’t know. If it’s all right, I’d like to hear Cardinal Harold’s opinion.”
I was confident that Fabivan wouldn’t object if it involved going near a border.
It would arouse less suspicion than if I spoke up myself, and even if it disrupted his plans, he would gladly allow it.
Because Cardin was there.
Fabivan looked at Harold, who sat across from him, and asked,
“I’m curious as well. Where would be good for our Saintess’s second pilgrimage?”
Leaning back in his chair, Harold swept his gaze across the room and spoke.
“I’ve heard there’s damage from monsters along the border between the Kingdom of Nicholas and the Kingdom of Helen.”
Fabivan’s gaze instantly landed on me. I didn’t look at him, keeping my eyes on Harold instead.
“They say it’s a small village, but wouldn’t they be the ones who need the Saintess most?”
Fabivan broke into a grin and nodded.
“Indeed. Those guarding the area may also be injured. There’s no place more in need of blessings. What do you think, Saintess?”
When I deliberately hesitated for a moment, the curve of his smile grew even higher, as if amused.
“I approve.”
“Does anyone else have a different opinion?”
Everyone stayed quiet, then nodded vigorously while watching Fabivan’s expression.
“A fine idea.”
“Y-Yes. That place, too, is in need of Lady Gloria’s care.”
“Heh heh. Thanks to His Excellency, the pilgrimage route has been decided. Then let’s conclude the meeting.”
When the meeting ended, everyone filed out in orderly fashion.
Left alone in the empty hall, I sat and reflected on my own ignorance.
After that, preparations moved quickly.
It was an itinerary that might take several days.
“Saintess. Have you ever seen a monster?”
“No, I haven’t. Monsters can’t descend into holy ground.”
Even when I was at the Grand Duke’s estate, I had never seen so much as the tip of a monster’s foot.
Amy shuddered, stopping mid-packing.
“Aren’t you scared? I heard they look absolutely terrifying.”
“Well. It’s not like I’ll be seeing the monsters themselves. We’re just going to the village to take care of the people.”
“But they say monsters sometimes come down to the villages too.”
I bent down and gently stroked her head.
“Amy. If you’re scared, it’s okay for you to stay here.”
She widened her eyes and shook her head fiercely.
“H-How could I let you go to such a scary place alone, Saintess!”
“The knights will be coming too. It’ll be fine, really.”
Tears welled in her eyes, but she still shook her head.
“I belong to you, Saintess. Serving you is my duty!”
Thanks to her, my troubled heart melted away, like soaking in warm water.
“If it gets too hard, don’t push yourself—just tell me. Anytime is fine.”
“Yes. Still, I wish you’d go to safe places, like banquets where everything is beautiful and decorated.”
As I looked down at Amy pouting, I crouched to meet her at eye level.
I had only just realized this myself, so she wasn’t that different from me.
No—aside from Harold, perhaps no one in all of Melissa found it strange that the Saintess attended only banquets.
“Amy.”
“Yes, Saintess.”
When our eyes met, Amy lowered her gaze even more.
“The position of a Saintess isn’t one that only attends banquets lit by dazzling lights. We have to go where shadows fall and light is needed. To places that desperately seek Lady Gloria more than anyone else—I must go there in her stead. I think that, above all, is what divine mercy truly is.”
Amy’s eyes grew wider and wider. She gasped and covered her mouth with both hands.
“I’m sorry. Oh no… I never thought about it like that.”
“It’s all right. I only just realized it myself.”
“Saintess! I’ll go! I’ll follow you!”
Muttering that she could do it, she threw herself back into packing her bag.
I looked away from her, stood up, and walked toward the window.
When I threw it open wide, the wind teased my hair.
Tonight, the dark sky was filled with an unusually large number of stars.
