Chapter 9

Fish Porridge (2024.02.09)

“This is the fish porridge for the cat, right? I used to eat this a lot….” Lorencia licked her lips and asked Julie.

Fish porridge is a porridge made by finely grinding fish meat and bones and simmering them slowly with milk. When she was locked in her room, one of the things the maids brought her from what they’d left over was fish porridge. To Lorencia, it was the best food. Going days without eating was common while she was imprisoned, so whenever fish porridge was brought in she would secretly scoop a little into an empty bowl she’d hidden, and when it rained she’d open the window and add rainwater to the bowl to make it go farther. It made the taste bland, of course, but it was enough to quiet the hunger.

Fish porridge spoils quickly in the heat. Whether the stomachache came from spoiled food or from hunger didn’t matter to Lorencia — hunger was the worse pain — so she’d rather eat spoiled food than suffer from hunger. That was why fish porridge was something she was grateful for.

“Yes. It’s fish porridge, Miss.”

“It’s so tasty.” Seeing Lorencia smile sharply, Julie swallowed hard without realising it. Where Lorencia had once been like a frog trembling in front of a snake, she was now the opposite — predatory, looking down at the frog with sharp eyes. Julie felt strangely intimidated. On top of the humiliation of having to call a bastard child “miss,” she felt so cowed she wanted to grab the girl by the hair, drag her into the corridor and beat her in front of everyone until the bastard child knew her place. But when she met Lorencia’s violet eyes… Julie alone became the frog.

“Head maid Julie, we’ll be going now.” Julie forced a stiff smile. One of the maids behind her stepped forward to pick up the bowl of fish porridge at Julie’s nod.

“Leave the porridge bowl where it is.”

“Huh?”

The maid who had been about to pick up the bowl froze, looking between Julie and Lorencia, visibly flustered. She didn’t know what to do and stood there with a sulky face.

“What are you being so cautious about? I told you to leave the porridge bowl, didn’t I?” Lorencia’s tone was sharp; the maid went pale and stepped back without touching the bowl.

“Julie, you really should re-teach the maids.”

“Mistress should tell me to teach them; I won’t do it just because you tell me to…” Julie snapped back without backing down. Her pride wouldn’t allow her to yield before these lowly common-born maids.

“If you want them trained, then we’ll do it right now.” Julie grabbed the wrist of the maid who hadn’t picked up the bowl and roughly pulled her forward. The maid started trembling and curling inward.

“You’re a bastard, yes, but you should listen to the words of the girl who was formally taken into Count Paul Heredian’s house. Should you weigh my words against hers? How insolent for a maid.” With a sharp sound, the maid’s head was jerked around. Her jaw and lips trembled. Julie raised her hand again. The maid gasped in pain.

“P-p-p-pro-sorry!” With another smack, the maid collapsed to the floor. She folded her elbows tight to her sides and shrank herself as if reflexively defending — it was obvious she’d been struck before.

“You shouldn’t be apologising to me. You should be apologising to Lorencia, the girl who was formally admitted into the House of Count Paul Heredian, despite being a bastard.”

“Yes. I understand.” The maid relaxed her crouch, rubbed the cheek that Julie’s hand had swollen, nodded up and down, and crawled on all fours like a dog toward Lorencia. She clutched Lorencia’s skirt and begged.

—Kraaaong! Leo, who was in Lorencia’s arms, hissed fiercely when the maid clung to Lorencia’s leg.

“Leo, calm down. It’s okay.”
—Kyaaaak!

“Miss, I’m sorry. Please forgive me this once.” Hearing the forced apology, the frightened smile and the voice saturated with terror, Lorencia felt her heart ache.

“I’ll forgive you. Now get up.”
“Thank you, Miss.” The maid glanced back nervously at Julie. Julie nodded to her with a satisfied air, and the maid finally rose.

Seeing the maid still terrified, Lorencia shook her head.

“Head maid Julie.”

“Yes? What is it?” Julie replied, beaming confidently.

Lorencia pointed again at the bowl of fish porridge. “Don’t you think that’s too much for Leo to eat?”

“Kittens usually eat a lot,” Julie answered.

“But I’ve been thinking and something’s odd.”

“What? What’s odd, Miss Lorencia?” Julie’s voice showed a hint of displeasure as she looked at Lorencia with a sour expression.

“It’s strange that Ilina asked you to take care of Leo’s food. Doesn’t that seem odd to you, Julie?” Lorencia’s mouth curled into a small sneer. She lightly kissed Leo’s head and stroked the back of his hand.
—Meow.

“What’s odd? I don’t find anything strange.”

<Julie! You must kill the cat!>
“Our kind Ilina told me to make sure the cat is well taken care of.”
<Kill it any way you can! Kill it!! She pisses me off! That monster! The cat! Everything annoys me! Kill them all! Aaaargh!>

“So I selected only the bonito flakes, mixed in premium oil, and simmered it into a rich fish porridge.”
“Ilina really told you to take care of him? Head maid Julie?” Lorencia smiled innocently. Julie could not be ignorant of Ilina’s peculiar hobbies — nor of why Leo was in Lorencia’s room.

It was unbelievable. The person who took Leo to Ilina had been Julie. From Leo’s point of view, Julie was the one who had taken him from his mother. Even as a kitten, Leo recognised Julie and was wary. Would he eat porridge made from the bonito that his enemy provided? No. One thing was certain: Leo was a clever cat.

“What did Ilina say to you about taking care of Leo?” Lorencia pressed.

“Kill the cat quickly—” Julie, flustered and irritated by Lorencia’s continued questioning, let slip the truth she was supposed to hide.

“Kill? What did you mean by that?” Lorencia was suddenly curious.

Julie felt an urge to sew her loose tongue shut. Her blurted words were clumsy.

“Do you mean it’s delicious enough that a kitten would die eating it? Or do you mean the cat will die after eating it?” Lorencia asked flatly.

“Of course she meant it’s delicious enough to kill him.” Cats are very sensitive to scent. Bonito is one of the best fish to satisfy a cat’s nose.

“Then why won’t Leo eat the porridge?” Lorencia asked. Julie forced a smile.
—Mnyaong!

“Leo only eats the porridge I give him, right?” Lorencia raised the corner of her mouth and fixed Julie with a steady gaze.

“He wouldn’t touch someone else’s food after barging into my room without permission, right? Would you, Leo?”
—Nyaung~! The tail twitched, as if answering. Lorencia’s face softened involuntarily when she saw it.

“Say it again: put the bowl down and everyone leave.”

“Huh?”

Lorencia smiled brightly and glanced at the porridge in the bowl, making a show of swallowing so Julie could see. She licked her lips.

“I won’t say it twice.”

“Then I will bring a fresh bowl on a trolley, Miss Lorencia.” Julie hurried forward to pick up the porridge.

“Head maid Julie.” Lorencia stepped in front of Julie with an expressionless face; her violet eyes gleamed terrifyingly. But her voice asking the question to Julie was gentle and soft.

Julie felt a heavy, stifling pressure press on her. She longed to open the terrace window and feel the breeze.

“I told you I won’t say it twice.” Julie was frozen in an awkward stiffness, bubbling with a frustration that made her feel she might explode. Where had the maids who’d been watching Lorencia bath in the tub gone?

“It’s only because the porridge got cold; I wanted to fetch you a fresh bowl.” Julie stammered.

“Julie, I’ll ask you something.” Lorencia’s voice was suddenly playful.

“Yes?”

“Do you know why horse racing is fun?”

Julie looked puzzled at the sudden change of topic. “Isn’t it because the addictive gambling of money changing hands makes it fun?”

“Horse racing is fun because you try to guess which horse will arrive first.” Lorencia stepped close and brushed her thin, pale fingers against Julie’s hand. Julie couldn’t help trembling.

“So, do you think it would be faster to have the bastard me train Head Maid Julie?” Lorencia snapped her head up, looking Julie straight in the face. Julie’s spine felt cold. Pleasure and mania rippled across Lorencia’s gaunt face. Her eyes seemed to be weighing whether to push Julie off a cliff or to lend her a hand.

“Or would it be quicker to replace the head maid?”

Julie felt as if cold water had been poured down the back of her neck. She realised Lorencia wasn’t joking.

Lorencia hadn’t been like this before — timid and easy to push around. What had changed her so? The Lorencia in front of Julie didn’t feel like the same person.

“I’ll bet it’s faster to replace the head maid. Where will you bet, Head Maid Julie?” Lorencia placed the palm of her hand lightly between Julie’s collarbones and smiled. Julie’s unease spiked; she felt something strange in her throat.

Ggk.

Julie clutched at her throat and gagged, collapsing to the floor. It felt as if someone had grabbed her throat; she couldn’t breathe and writhed in agony. Tears and snot smeared her face as she instinctively reached out toward Lorencia and croaked, “Sa…ve…me…”

The maids who watched Julie suddenly slump could only stare, frozen.

Lorencia brushed the hair stuck to Julie’s face away, stroked her cheek, and whispered softly, “I’ll spare you for now.”

Suddenly Julie’s airways cleared, her body convulsed, and she started gasping loudly.

“Huff… huff…”
“Head maid Julie.” Julie looked up at Lorencia, trembling. Their violet eyes met. A dark fear seemed to swallow her from the inside. That wasn’t Lorencia. It was a monster or a devil wearing her face.

“Wouldn’t it be faster to replace the head maid?” Only one thought flashed through Julie’s mind after that: ‘I have to get away.’