~CHAPTER 67~
“Lincia.”
When that moment comes, will she be able to forgive him?
To be honest, even now, his attitude toward the child was…
“Just how great of a father did the Emperor choose for this child that you’re so determined to bear it?”
“I keep thinking it would’ve been better if I didn’t have a child.”
If the child is born and resembles Harvich, only then will he try to protect it once my innocence is proven.
But if the child doesn’t look like him?
Then will he doubt me for the rest of his life?
The thought made it hard to breathe.
“Above all, you don’t even believe what I say.”
“……”
“That I’m carrying your child. That you’re the father.”
Harvich stayed silent.
Lincia carefully took off her ring and handed it back to him.
The ring looked terribly small resting on his large palm.
“You don’t like the design, do you? I’ll have a new one made.”
He spoke like someone who hadn’t heard her last words.
That reaction made Lincia’s thoughts even firmer.
“Why?”
“I just… can’t picture our future.”
His pupils trembled roughly at her words.
“……Are you saying you’re thinking of divorce?”
Lincia shook her head.
“No, that’s not it.”
“Then why?”
Harvich’s expression twisted.
He stared blankly at the platinum ring lying on his palm before curling his fingers around it.
“Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“Can you picture our future?”
“Me managing the Grand Duke’s estate as your wife, or the color of our child’s eyes… Have you imagined what the child will be like?”
“How could I not imagine that?”
“……Don’t lie.”
Harvich stood up.
He reached out gently and brushed the tears from the corners of her eyes.
Before either of them realized it, her face was wet with tears.
“You’ll be a wise and merciful duchess.”
“……And if I’m not?”
“It’ll still be fine.”
“……”
“The child’s eyes will be violet. If it’s a daughter, she’ll be lovely like you. If it’s a son, he’ll have kind eyes.”
“I look forward to the seasons we’ll spend with our child, though I worry too. If the child takes after your frailness, they might fall ill often. I just don’t want your child to suffer.”
Harvich carefully took Lincia’s hand and slid the ring back onto her finger.
“Lincia, I…”
“……”
“I want to be the father of this child.”
Hearing that, she cried even harder.
“Please don’t cry.”
He knew why she was crying, and it frustrated him that he couldn’t comfort her.
He couldn’t bring himself to lie and say he believed what he couldn’t.
That would be deceit.
Instead, he gently stroked her back and promised to raise the child with love.
He swore that even if they had another child someday, he would never show favoritism.
He would love them all equally.
Thankfully, Lincia stopped crying.
Her reddened eyes worried him.
They’ll probably swell by tomorrow.
“I’ll bring an ice pack.”
He tried to stand, but Lincia stopped him and bowed her head with an apology.
“I’m sorry.”
For what?
His chest tightened.
Sorry? For what exactly?
There was nothing in their conversation that was her fault.
If anyone was to blame, it was Harvich.
He was the one who had rushed to talk about marriage first, making her uneasy.
Aside from improving her treatment as the Grand Duchess, he had done little to actually ease her worries.
Even the matter of the child—he should’ve brought it up first.
Not Lincia.
“Don’t apologize to me.”
He had never given her any reassurance.
He had only thought about wanting to be the child’s father but had never said it aloud.
Though he knew it was a conversation they needed to have before the child was born, he kept avoiding it.
It was entirely his fault.
“None of this is your fault.”
He had prepared the ring because her bare finger had bothered him.
Then, realizing they hadn’t yet held a proper ceremony, he brought up the wedding.
“I was too hasty.”
Lincia lifted her head.
The morning light was spilling across her cheeks as the sun rose.
Harvich, holding her in his arms, reached out to close the canopy.
He felt her grip tighten on his robe.
“……Honestly, I didn’t want our first conversation after all this time to be like this.”
“It’s a talk we should’ve had long ago.”
I’m sorry for making you bring up something so heavy.
He caressed her hand and added softly,
“It’s not that I disliked the idea of having a wedding.”
“I know.”
Her cautious look, as if worried he might be upset, pained him.
He reached out and stroked her cheek.
“I just… wanted to wait until people liked me a little more. Then, I wanted to do it.”
Seeing tears gather again in her eyes made his chest ache.
“All right.”
He wanted to tell her not to care about those worthless people and just marry him already, but he held his tongue.
He understood her feelings.
And besides, he was still optimistic about the situation himself.
It wasn’t right to avoid responsibility just because she didn’t agree with his outlook.
“If you ever change your mind, tell me anytime.”
Lincia didn’t answer.
She tossed and turned for a long time.
Even though she looked exhausted, sleep wouldn’t come.
Worried, Harvich spoke quietly.
“Can’t you sleep?”
“……No.”
Her sleepy voice was slurred and soft.
When he turned his head, Lincia was watching him with her eyes half-open.
“It’s just… it feels sad to end our first meeting in a while with only this kind of talk…”
“Sleep.”
At his gentle tone, Lincia closed her eyes.
“I’ll be here with you tomorrow too.”
Soon, her breathing deepened into sleep, and Harvich closed his eyes beside her.
* * *
When Lincia opened her eyes, it was already late afternoon.
“You’re awake?”
At the sound of his low voice, she turned her head.
He was lying beside her, watching her.
It surprised her to see him still in bed at this hour.
Harvich looked as though he hadn’t stepped outside even once.
He was dressed exactly as he had been the night before.
Lincia blinked at him in mild surprise.
Her throat was dry, her voice faint.
She cleared her throat, and Harvich immediately poured her a glass of water.
“You can sleep a bit more if you’d like.”
“No, I’m awake.”
She glanced at him.
Even though she’d risen, he still hadn’t moved.
“……Aren’t you going to work today?”
“I took sick leave.”
She looked at him with concern.
Given how long he’d been out in the snow, there was no way he was completely fine.
Worried, she sat up and reached out to touch his forehead.
“You don’t have a fever…”
Then she caught the embarrassed look on his face.
“Wait—did you just lie?”
