[CHAPTER 102]
It was red.
A bright red color without a hint of impurity.
That alone proved the child belonged to Harvich.
Even the hair that had just begun to grow was pure white.
Harvich stared at the child’s face.
As if to reassure himself that he was not mistaken, he waited, but the eye color never changed.
Lincia had truly given birth to his child, just as she claimed.
“You looked unwell that day. Maybe that’s why you don’t remember.”
When had it happened?
Even as he looked at a child clearly sharing his blood, Harvich could not recall that night.
If he had held Lincia in his arms, he would never have forgotten it.
There were countless nights when he had harbored desires he shouldn’t have, and he had endured every one of them.
Yet a child was born from a night he could not remember.
“Honestly, my only strength is that I’m healthy. So it’s hard to believe I was drugged like you claim.”
He shouldn’t have used that excuse to avoid talking to her.
But he had been afraid.
Afraid to hear from her own lips that she might have spent that night with another man.
How had she endured all this time?
All alone, with no one to rely on, for so long…
How could she have survived by his side when he never trusted her for even a moment?
There was no room for debate. All of it was unmistakably Harvich’s fault.
Something brushed his fingertips.
He turned his gaze and saw the baby.
The same red eyes curved gently, and the smiling face resembled Lincia so much that Harvich reached out without thinking.
The baby grabbed his finger.
Why was the child smiling so brightly at a father who had denied his existence until now?
The stiffness in Harvich’s face slowly loosened.
“Now you believe me, don’t you?”
Her voice was cold enough that it was hard to believe it belonged to Lincia.
Harvich carefully pulled his finger away from the baby’s grasp.
When he looked back, he saw Lincia standing with the help of a maid.
“Anna, you may go.”
The maid hesitated, but at Lincia’s gaze she bowed her head and left.
Lincia braced herself against the wall, looking unsteady.
When Harvich moved a step toward her, she flinched and drew her shoulders in.
It felt like a clear warning not to come any closer, so he stopped where he was.
“Lincia.”
Why had she come all the way here in her condition?
He wanted to say he was sorry for not believing her all this time.
He had so many things he wanted to say, but nothing came out.
He knew that no words would comfort her now.
“That child is yours. You’re not still going to deny it after seeing him with your own eyes, are you?”
“He is our child.”
Lincia’s lips trembled slightly.
She stood alone, looking so unstable that Harvich kept twitching his fingers, tempted to support her.
“I heard you named him.”
“I’m sorry for telling you so late.”
“How do I know you didn’t name him after seeing him just now?”
“When you gave birth, I planned to be by your side, and—”
He tried to explain, but Lincia’s cold gaze silenced him immediately.
“How can I believe that? There’s no record of it anywhere.”
Without a record, there was no proof.
Harvich realized he would never be able to prove he had named the child beforehand.
And yet, it didn’t feel unfair.
Because he had never believed her either.
“So you finally decided to join in my delusion.”
You even named the child.
But what do we do now?
“It’s too late.”
Even though she didn’t say the next part aloud, he knew exactly what she meant.
Harvich’s heart thudded anxiously in his chest.
“Let’s end this.”
“Lincia.”
Harvich wanted to fix everything.
Before the child was born, he wanted to resolve everything related to the duchy.
The North was no place to raise a child, not as it was now.
He had wanted to create a better environment, for the baby who would soon be born.
It would’ve been for Lincia’s sake, and for his own.
But if Lincia left… if she disappeared from his side…
“I didn’t want to raise my child in this environment. Not me.”
“I know.”
Lincia cut him off.
“I know why you had to fight a war, and why it had to be now.”
She didn’t resent him.
She simply looked at him with weary eyes, purple and empty, filled with nothing but resignation.
It suffocated him.
“But does that matter to me? You didn’t keep your promises, and you never believed me until the end.”
Lincia clutched her chest, gasping for breath.
“How can I stay with a man who doesn’t trust me? Could you live like that?”
“…”
“You can’t answer, can you?”
“We can’t separate.”
“Why not? If the child is the problem, take him. I gave birth only so you would see him. You raise him.”
“How could I possibly do that?”
“Why not? You didn’t trust me for nearly a year. You couldn’t even pretend to.”
Her emotions surged, and her body leaned forward dangerously.
“Lincia.”
She looked like she would collapse any moment, her breath ragged.
“Don’t. Stay away.”
“Lincia, please.”
She finally collapsed.
* * *
It felt like a dream.
A dream where Harvich stayed by her side as she gave birth.
The past couldn’t be changed, so why did she dream something like that?
“You must have been tired. I already prepared the young master’s meal.”
“Thank you.”
Her voice was cracked.
When Lincia touched her throat, Anna kindly brought her water.
“His name is Lucas.”
“What?”
Lucas.
It meant light.
Lincia whispered the child’s name softly.
“If it was a girl, he said she would have been Astelia.”
I see. So what?
Lincia no longer wanted to trust or understand a man.
“Would you like to go see him?”
She went to see the child.
Then why was she lying in a bed now?
And this room wasn’t hers.
There was sunlight.
“You collapsed. Do you remember anything?”
“…No, I don’t.”
“The physician said you fainted from malnutrition.”
Anna tried to sound cheerful, but Lincia could tell she was anxious.
Her red, swollen eyes proved she had been crying.
“Alright. Bring me something to eat. I think I’m hungry.”
“Yes, right away.”
She had gone so long without eating properly that her breakfast was nothing more than watery soup and bread.
She only ate a little, but Anna was relieved even by that.
Lincia looked out toward the bright sunlight and parted her lips.
Even eating so little made her stomach feel heavy.
“Call Tereo. I want to go outside.”
Anna hesitated.
“It might be too much for your body.”
“I won’t go far. I just want some air.”
Anna brought gloves and a coat. They were gifts from the Marquess and Marchioness of Welstern.
Lincia was about to leave the room when she saw someone standing at the door, and it wasn’t Tereo.
“Why are you here?”
“I heard you were going outside. I’m worried. You collapsed just ye—”
Harvich bit down on his lips.
“You’re the reason.”
“…”
He didn’t answer.
She knew Harvich would never agree to a separation easily.
So how could she make him let her go?
“I love you, Lincia.”
The sudden confession erased every thought from her mind.
“I love you.”
What was this man saying?
Love? He loved her?
“I know I have wronged you. I will do better. So please, don’t divorce me.”
Harvich said more while kneeling, but she barely heard a word of it.
His confession didn’t reach her at all.
If he loved her, why couldn’t he let her go when she asked?
Thinking back, Harvich’s love had always looked like this.
With that kindness, he had deceived her for two years while forging records.
With that kindness, he had allowed her to stay even while pregnant with a child he did not trust.
With that kindness, he had named a child his heir while never once believing he was the father.
Even when she knew he lied, Lincia wanted to believe him.
Even when he did wrong, she wanted to forgive him.
Even when she couldn’t, she tried to understand…
But now, Lincia no longer wanted to understand Harvich.
“I don’t love you anymore.”
Because her love had ended.
