TWWSY 47

Chapter 47

At this point, she found it irritating that he kept trying to talk to her. Mia had known even before Etienne desperately begged for forgiveness like this that he didn’t act out of malice.

Etienne, too, likely wasn’t reaching out because he thought Mia was unaware of that fact. Still, Mia found even that attitude hard to accept.

‘It’s not like he’s pitying me either.’

Swish, swoosh. Her sword sliced through the air again. Mia had a lot she wanted to say, too. But none of it felt appropriate for the situation, so she simply chose to stay silent.

She didn’t even want to be angry with Etienne.

‘If there’s anyone to be disappointed in, it’s myself.’

She wished Etienne would just leave her alone. If she was to avoid speaking impulsively, she needed time alone to sort out her emotions.

‘Young lady,’ he had called her. She clearly disliked that title, but not even a sharp retort telling him to stop came back. There was no way he hadn’t heard her from that distance—so his silence was a deliberate choice to ignore her.

The operations officer made good use of sleepless hours. During their stay in Ruinal alone, there had been three assassination attempts on her life.

And that was only the number he was aware of. If Etienne’s shadows had failed to detect others, the actual count could have been higher.

So it wasn’t strange for her to be spending her spare time training with a sword.

However…

Etienne watched Mia’s back silently. He still couldn’t understand this woman who was his deputy, his operations officer, and his fake lover. It wasn’t just because her strategic outlook differed from his own. More fundamentally, Mia…

…looked lonely.

Etienne had a rough idea of what she had gone through in the political world. Given that history, it was understandable that she wouldn’t open up to people easily. No matter how specially he treated her, he knew he wouldn’t easily become an exception.

He understood that, so this feeling probably wasn’t disappointment. It wasn’t resentment either—not like when he had whined to her before.

Even so, he felt strange. He wanted to say something more. Even if she responded coldly, he wanted some kind of reply. Etienne couldn’t put into words exactly what he was feeling.

Mia continued acting as if Etienne didn’t exist, and even after he gave up and simply watched her, it was only after quite some time that she quietly spoke.

“I don’t entirely disagree with your position.”

That was all she said, without once looking back at him.

“Your position,” she’d said. Not Etienne, not even Rochefort, just you. That one-syllable title felt agonizingly distant.

“I wasn’t asking you to understand my position. No, I never wanted to force my position on you. I just—”

“I know. That you said it for my sake.”

“……”

“You probably thought I was useless, that I only got in the way. I’ve spent a lot of time on the battlefield, but maybe my strategies weren’t good enough. Last time, if I had been stronger, there wouldn’t have been any need for you to step in.”

“Mia.”

“As an operations officer, if I couldn’t offer satisfactory strategies, then of course I don’t deserve to stand on the frontlines. I think your judgment was reasonable. I also know that framing my disgraceful discharge as ‘returning to Etalon’ was the greatest kindness you could offer me.”

“I think you’re misunderstanding something.”

“Misunderstanding what?”

Etienne took a step closer to her. He seemed desperate to clear up the misunderstanding. Pain he couldn’t hide was etched in his face.

“I’ve never once thought you were incompetent.”

“If an operations officer had been competent, you wouldn’t have tried to kick her out without even looking that sorry.”

“It wasn’t that I wasn’t sorry—”

“I don’t want to hear your excuses. I’m sure you had your reasons. You don’t have to try so hard to spare my feelings. I wasn’t even that upset.”

“……”

“Well, honestly, I was upset. But I don’t expect the corps commander to cater to an unqualified officer just to avoid hurting their pride. It’s fine. It’s just that—”

“Mia. Please, just listen to me!”

“No, you listen to me. I’m not running away from this battlefield. If my incompetence is the issue, I’ll find a way to use my abilities in a way that benefits you. If I lack something you need, I’ll work to acquire it.”

“……”

Etienne didn’t answer. In the first place, his reason for sending Mia back to the capital had never been that.

The vanguard was a dangerous place. Etienne was not the kind of man who could stand by and watch someone he admired—someone with barely any real battle experience—be thrown into such peril.

Besides, that was part of the role he had to play, too…

That really was all there was to it.

Which was why he couldn’t come up with any compelling counterargument. Telling a woman who refused to even listen, who begged to stay and prove herself, that she had to leave—it felt like a sin.

Mia, oblivious to the turmoil in the corps commander’s heart, continued in a calm tone.

“I know I may not meet your expectations. I know you have no reason to acknowledge me. And after you lost consciousness trying to save me, and treatment isn’t working… you might resent me even more.”

Etienne had never had any such thoughts, so as the conversation progressed, he felt more and more wronged. But if he tried to explain himself again, Mia—so worked up—would just cut him off. So he decided to listen quietly to the end.

“Still, I’m more useful to you here. Maybe it’s frustrating that I don’t understand everything you know. But in return, I know things you don’t.”

Mia took a deep breath. Maybe Etienne already believed she had outlived her usefulness. Thinking that made it hard for her to suppress the anxiety rising inside her.

“My plans won’t be wrong. Of course, like last time, they might… might put you in danger again… So maybe you can’t trust what I say… but…”

Emotions she couldn’t fully suppress spilled from her lips. Mia could no longer hide the tremble in her voice.

“I can prevent your misfortune. I can give you the glory you’ve only dreamed of. If it comes to it, I don’t mind being used as a shield. No—if that’s what it takes to fulfill my purpose, I’ll be glad.”

“……”

“So please, please… don’t tell me to leave like this, without accomplishing anything.”

Even though not a single tear fell from her eyes, she looked as if she were crying.

* * *

Even for someone from the Sacred Legion, it was rare for a common soldier to be offered a chance at promotion. Unlike noble children, they hadn’t attended military academies from a young age, and few possessed a devotion noble enough to win recognition from the temple just by wanting to escape poverty.

But that didn’t mean they lacked ambition. So when disgraced former vice-captain Lenard secretly summoned Frambe, a regular knight of the Sacred Legion, Frambe was overjoyed.

“Hey, come here, quick.”

“What now?”

“Guess what offer I just got?”

“Let me guess—you’re trying to drag us into another one of your ridiculous schemes, claiming it’s some ‘fun job.’ You remember how badly that went last time, right? I’m not interested. Let’s just train. You know how on edge the corps commander has been lately.”

“C’mon, Marcel. You worry too much. This time it’s really important. If we pull it off, we could change our lives. Get it? You might even be able to pay off your mom’s debts! We could finally be done with this miserable soldier life.”