2.
It was raining since morning on the day of my mother’s funeral.
Her coffin was laid to rest in the royal family’s cemetery, located at the far back of the imperial palace.
While her coffin was being buried, the emperor knelt on the ground without even an umbrella, wailing in agony.
“Aaaaah! Tilia! My Tilia!”
With the sovereign of the nation like that, who would dare stand upright?
Everyone attending the funeral knelt behind the emperor.
My younger brother Moren and I were no exception.
“Tilia!”
The emperor sobbed like a madman.
Because of him, I couldn’t even get a clear view of my mother’s grave.
Suddenly, I felt someone gripping my hand tightly.
“Hngh…”
When I looked to the side, Moren was holding back tears as he stared straight ahead.
Because the emperor was the one crying, we didn’t dare to grieve more openly.
That’s why little Moren was trembling all over, desperately suppressing his sobs.
Clutching my hand with all his strength.
I returned the grip and stared at the emperor.
He was always a greedy man who wanted to consume every part of my mother.
‘Is that why he wants to monopolize even her final moments?’
Even denying her children that farewell.
‘Mother…’
That night—I shouldn’t have left her alone.
I should have kept Modwey by her side the whole time. No, I should have gone to her myself.
‘I knew I shouldn’t let my guard down, not even for a moment.’
Why now… of all times?
That moment of carelessness led to an irreversible outcome.
‘Why did I do that?’
Was I really so afraid of people’s eyes that I failed to protect her?
Regret, sorrow, and a heavy guilt slammed into my chest.
The pain was so immense that I looked up at the sky.
From the heavy clouds above, the rain continued to fall without rest.
As I stood there in the rain without an umbrella, following the emperor’s lead, Marinne appeared and whispered.
[Master, I pulled in all the rain clouds nearby~. It’ll rain until tonight~.]
‘…Good job.’
[Don’t be too sad, Master~. Death is just the beginning of something new.]
Marinne rubbed her head against my cheek in comfort, then disappeared.
I stared blankly at the sky.
Raindrops tapped against my eyelids.
‘They said it was going to rain in a few days. I’m glad.’
Thanks to that, I could move Marinne and make the rain come early.
The reason I did this was simple:
‘Because in the rain, I can hide a few tears that I otherwise wouldn’t be able to.’
“Ugh… Mother…”
For Moren, who kept his head down the whole time…
And for me, whose tears hadn’t stopped from earlier…
In the end, this rain was for the living.
‘Yeah… This is the kind of person I am. That’s why I couldn’t protect her.’
A small realization brushed past my mind.
Even in a moment like this, I couldn’t grieve purely. I was already thinking of not giving others a reason to use this against me later.
Though I had spent years acting like a sunshine-filled child for my mother’s sake, in the end, I couldn’t escape my nature.
‘So then…’
I slowly lifted my head.
Looking forward, I saw the burial was complete, and the emperor had risen from the ground.
As he looked at my mother’s grave, he creaked his neck and turned to look behind him.
And in that moment, our eyes met—his crimson gaze burned into me.
With his head half-turned, the emperor stared at me with something boiling in his eyes.
‘Hostility.’
At the sight of such a blatant emotion, I lowered my gaze.
And once again, I heard a spirit’s voice whisper in my ear.
It was Modwey.
[Master! I remembered the poison your mother took!]
As the whisper continued, my hand clenched into a fist.
My eyes must be seething with hatred now.
But I couldn’t let it show—not yet. So all I could do was bow my head like a dutiful daughter.
‘I won’t let it end like this.’
No matter how much the emperor declares it a suicide, he cannot deceive my spirit-enhanced eyes.
‘I’m sure of it. Mother was murdered.’
So I’ll pay back the one who killed you.
Whether you wanted it or not.
‘Because this is the kind of person I am, Mother.’
There was no sunlight anymore.
***
The first memory of my life—
It was the moment when the spirits first appeared to me, as I was playing alone when I was very little.
[Wow! A new master! Hello, hello! I’m Modwey!]
[Oh my~ What a cute little girl~? I’m Marinne~ Nice to meet you~.]
[My name is Nesgal. Still, for the three of us to appear at the same time…! This master must have tremendous power!]
A translucent bird fluttering about me, a mysterious blue fish, a lizard with flame-like patterns.
I watched them quietly and whispered to my nanny.
– Nanny, look. That animal just talked.
– Pardon?
– They’re talking to each other. You can’t hear it?
The nanny grew deeply concerned for me.
Because she truly couldn’t see or hear anything.
She immediately reported my condition to my mother.
– The princess seems to be showing symptoms of delusion.
But my mother showed displeasure toward the nanny.
– Why would you call that a delusion? Neroli just has a vivid imagination! It’s totally normal for a child!
The nanny never understood my mother either.
My mother always said the nanny was too sensitive, and the nanny thought my mother was uneducated.
The nanny, especially displeased with my mother, took me aside and repeatedly stressed:
– Princess Neroli, do you remember what I told you?
– Yes. The royal family of Lornord inherits the blood of dragons, which gives them great power. But with great power comes great responsibility.
– That’s right. And those responsibilities can appear as symptoms. Like hallucinations or auditory delusions, such as what you’re experiencing now.
So if your condition worsens, please let me know immediately. Understood?
I nodded at her final words, but after that, I never spoke of seeing spirits again.
Because instinctively, I knew they weren’t hallucinations or figments of imagination.
– Where did you come from?
Whenever I secretly asked them, the spirits would answer:
[We’ve been asleep for a long time!]
[Until we meet our master, we are just part of nature~.]
[Only one chosen human can form a contract with us!]
As time passed, I was granted access to the central palace library and began researching spirits.
But strangely, there were barely any books about them. The only information I found was this:
“The power of spirits, imbued with divine energy, and the magic-filled blood of dragons are complete opposites.”
This phrase was consistently written in the forbidden books related to divine power.
The moment I read that, the shock I felt is something I’ll never forget.
‘Because the royal family of Lornord is undeniably descended from dragons.’
They possessed bodies immune to any poison or disease and even bore blessings that caused the deaths of would-be assassins.
Thanks to these superhuman traits, Lornord had maintained its supremacy on the continent for centuries.
So as the emperor’s daughter, I wasn’t supposed to see or hear spirits at all.
Which meant…
‘I might not be the emperor’s real daughter.’
Only after that suspicion arose did I recall my mother’s strange behavior.
She would never let anyone rough me up, not even slightly.
If I so much as tripped, she would panic and summon every doctor in sight.
Every season, she brought rare medicinal herbs and fed them to me without fail.
‘She was especially sensitive about my health.’
In historical records, there were certainly obsessive consorts who fed their children all kinds of rare herbs.
So everyone simply thought my mother cherished me dearly. And perhaps because of her efforts, I grew up healthy—unlike my other siblings.
‘But the truth was, it was all to cover up the fact that I didn’t inherit the body or blessings of Lornord.’
Later, I formed contracts with the spirits to gather more information, even going as far as injuring myself to test how long it took to heal.
The more I investigated, the more confident I became.
‘I’m my mother’s illegitimate child.’
I tried to understand her.
My mother had no escape—she was forced to become empress because of the emperor.
Maybe, if it was to keep me alive, that was the best she could do.
While I tried to empathize, I couldn’t stop the sting of betrayal.
Because I had believed—hoped—that at least my mother wouldn’t lie to me.
Her fickleness had worn me down…
‘But in the imperial palace, I thought she was my only ally.’
But what could I do?
I could suppress my emotions, but not ignore the truth before me.
Revealing that truth and agitating her would have been dangerous. So I lived on constant alert.
‘So that no one would ever suspect my birth, I always acted cheerful.’
Lovable. Naive. Innocent. A little clueless.
The more transparently I behaved, the more pleased my mother was. No one ever doubted me, and I wore the mask with all I had.
‘Come to think of it, I did everything I could to play the “sunshine girl.”’
Even tending to plants was part of the act.
