chapter 8
For a moment, my heart flinched. But I forced myself to act nonchalant.
“Even if it’s espionage, it’s still my duty, so I’ll do my best.”
Aiden suddenly stepped closer. Startled by the sudden proximity, I recoiled slightly, and he spoke quietly.
“Even knowing you could lose your life, are you willing to go that far?”
Aiden’s voice was quite threatening. More than that, his gaze on me was sharp, as if he could pull me away at any moment.
My heart raced, but now was not the time to reveal everything. And Aiden was someone who followed rules more than anyone.
If I truly were a spy, he would have drawn his gun on me immediately.
But if the Ruber Empire hadn’t sent my younger brother to such a battlefield in the first place, I wouldn’t have had to go this far.
“My brother is already dead. So my life is practically over anyway.”
A lump rose in my throat, but I quickly stepped inside the barracks.
When I lifted my head weakly, Kalien was looking at me. His deep green eyes were strange in some way—not as sharp as before.
I avoided his gaze, my mind in turmoil, and a sharp voice cut through the quiet.
“That statement.”
“…….”
“Is it true?”
“What statement?”
“That since your brother is dead, your life is practically over.”
How did he hear that? Even so, the barracks weren’t structured in a way that sound would travel easily. Perhaps he really was a spy—he seemed unusually sharp in noticing such things.
The surroundings were unusually quiet. The faint smell of chemicals, then tobacco, drifted past my nose in turn.
Through it all, I felt a gaze piercing me, persistent—as if it wouldn’t look away until I answered.
I answered weakly.
“Everything else I said was true, but that… is a lie.”
“…….”
“My heart hurts because of my brother, but I still want to live.”
“Then why did you tell the barracks officer otherwise?”
“Because doing this at all is basically putting my life at risk.”
“…….”
“Even now, I regret saving that person. If I had just said there was a mark back then, my life would have been simpler.”
My heart raced dozens of times a day. Tension came along with it.
“But now that things have come this far, I have a responsibility too. So I’ll do my best until you leave this place.”
“…….”
“And I’m tired of gunfire. I don’t want to watch someone die next to me again.”
I felt Kalien’s gaze, but I ignored it, trying to look at the wound on his leg. He slightly shifted away at that moment.
“Let’s start with the shave first.”
“Pardon?”
“I’d like you to shave me first.”
Startled, I stayed still. Kalien handed me a razor and a small piece of paper.
“Did you bring water?”
Every time I came here, I carried a bucket, so I nodded. When I handed it over, Kalien dipped the small paper in water and rubbed it in his hand.
Bubbles immediately formed on his large hand.
Kalien motioned slightly to the side. I handed him the mirror on the bedside table. He skillfully applied the foam to his jaw and cheeks. Then he looked at me.
When our eyes met, he spoke quietly.
“Are you just going to keep staring?”
“Pardon?”
“Bring the razor here.”
I hurriedly picked it up. Standing beside the bed, he motioned for me to sit next to him.
“Sit here.”
I carefully sat down beside him. He nodded toward the razor.
“Delin.”
Kalien’s green eyes were on me. His attractive gaze drew my attention, and I nervously blurted out,
“I might not do this well.”
“I told you, it’s fine if a scar remains on my face.”
I exhaled inwardly. With no choice, I carefully raised the razor.
Even if Kalien spoke casually, I knew what kind of family he came from. Besides, I was already treating his wound and didn’t want to make it worse.
As I pressed the razor to his face, he smirked slightly.
“You really intend to leave a scar, huh?”
“Pardon?”
“If you hold the razor so tightly, it’ll cut your skin.”
I immediately relaxed my hand. He glanced at me and smiled faintly.
“Start from under the ear.”
Tense, I slowly ran the razor under his ear. The foam slid down as I followed the motion.
My hands trembled, but I carefully guided the razor over the foam.
“Under the chin, go from bottom to top.”
Kalien watched me, eyes wide. We were too close; I could feel his breath on my hand. Or rather, he could hear me breathing. When I stared blankly, his eyes softened slightly.
“Delin.”
I just blinked. Kalien gazed steadily at me.
“If you keep staring like that, will my beard grow faster?”
I hurriedly gripped the razor again, focusing as I carefully shaved. Like he said, under the chin, I moved the razor from bottom to top.
His jawline, along with his breath, was uncomfortably close. Even his lips. I raised my gaze in embarrassment and met his eyes.
I quickly lowered the razor. Still, thanks to my focus earlier, most of the foam was gone, and it looked neat.
I stood quickly and handed him the mirror.
Kalien looked around, then back at me.
“Can you give me some water?”
I handed him the bucket, and he rinsed off the foam with the opposite hand from his side. It looked much cleaner now.
Indeed, he had a handsome face. Feeling like I was staring too much, I lowered my head. His voice reached me.
“Your brother is about my age.”
“How did you know?”
“I saw it in a book.”
“A book?”
“Yes.”
For a moment, I remembered the details of my brother I had tucked into the book, along with the notes I wrote when I had a spare moment. My mind went blank, and I said nothing. He asked,
“What division was your brother in?”
“…White Tree, 3rd Division.”
Kalien’s eyebrows twitched slightly.
“White Tree? That division served in quite a few battlefields, didn’t it?”
“Probably.”
Judging by the letter that came from the western frontier of Elpher, it seemed likely. I set the bucket aside, heavy-hearted.
Living with such anxious feelings was all because the Empire had sent my brother to such a place. Anger slipped out without realizing it.
“In the Ruber Empire, even if I work here, I’m not properly recognized. They even promised burial in the Royal Memorial Park, but I haven’t received any official notice yet.”
“Official notice?”
“Yes. It seems others have already received theirs, but I haven’t.”
I wondered what could be taking so long. I wanted to go to headquarters myself.
“Probably something at headquarters hasn’t been fully verified.”
“…….”
“When the list comes up here, they always check excessively carefully there.”
I just nodded, bowing my head weakly.
“Your brother’s name is Arthur Decheil, correct?”
“Yes.”
At my answer, Kalien handed me a book from the bedside table.
“Good. I saw it.”
The book was The Purple Velvet Dress.
“What about the other books?”
“I haven’t finished them yet.”
It seemed earlier he had only read that book, but hadn’t finished it. He then raised his hand again. Instinctively, I took it, and he said,
“It was tucked between the pages. Notes you wrote.”
My face froze. In those notes, I had written my brother’s name, wishes for his safety, and all the things I wanted to do.
Go to a flower-filled garden, visit a seaside cafe—everything I hoped to do after the war.
I opened the book immediately. Between the pages were my personal information and several notes I had forgotten.
Kalien, still staring with wide eyes, spoke softly.
“Among the people of the Ruber Empire, you were a little unusual.”
His voice was low, but his gaze seemed curious. He continued,
“I’ve heard that Ruber Empire people don’t write down what they truly want on paper.”
That was true. People usually kept their true desires in their minds. They believed only then would it come true.
But now, in the middle of war, unsure of my own survival, I wanted someone—if they found these notes—to fulfill them on my behalf.
Clutching the book, I lowered my head. It felt like an enemy of my Empire had discovered everything in my heart.
Feeling uneasy, I quickly left the barracks.
The next morning, I left the lodging as usual. A soldier delivering letters came and handed them to the residents. I passed by and took a few steps when I heard,
“Delin!”
It was Louise’s voice. I turned, and she ran toward me urgently. Curious, I approached, and she stopped quickly, handing me an envelope.
“The Royal House sent a notice!”
It was the notice that had been missing until yesterday. I eagerly tore it open, doubtful it was real.
The royal snake emblem was gilded in gold, with an ornate golden border—excessively fancy.
[We announce that the soldier Arthur Decheil has been laid to rest in the Royal Memorial Park. May he rest in peace.]
Below, the date and time of the burial were listed. I couldn’t believe it and said aloud,
“Until yesterday, even the barracks officer hadn’t mentioned anything.”
“Someone must have pressured headquarters, it came urgently today. Seems headquarters sent it quickly.”
