Chapter 40
“You Don’t Know Either”
“Yeah, I’m glad I came.”
I mumbled as I slowly drifted off to sleep.
“Senior, you have no idea how big of a decision it was for me to come to Elche.”
I spoke unconsciously as I stared at Roitz through my half-closed eyes.
“So… please pay a little attention to me too.”
“….”
As my thoughts faded into sleep, I heard Roitz’s quiet voice.
“You don’t know either… what it means for me to say I’m glad you came.”
* * *
The next morning, when I opened my eyes, Roitz was gone.
The fireplace still felt warm—he must’ve kept it burning all night.
The air in the room was still cozy.
I pushed off my blanket, got off the sofa, and went over to the fire.
‘Did he add more wood?’
Now that I looked, the woodpile that was next to the fireplace yesterday was gone, and there was a lot of ash inside.
He must’ve used up all the wood while I slept.
‘So he was adding wood even during the night…’
I crouched in front of the crackling fire and waited for him to come back.
But even after a long time, Roitz didn’t return.
‘No way… Did he leave for the capital already?’
His robe and jacket were also gone.
Outside the window, the sky was bright again. A clear blue late-spring morning, as if last night’s storm never happened.
‘That conversation last night…’
The memory of Roitz smiling at me after nearly a month felt almost like a dream.
Maybe the rainy night made not just my mood, but also my memories, feel hazy.
“….”
The room felt warm, but empty without him.
I was left alone.
I clenched my fist and tried to shake off the weird feeling.
‘No, I said I’d start over, didn’t I?’
Even if Roitz stayed cold, I promised myself I’d keep trying and rebuild his trust.
I stood and put on my now-dry jacket.
Yeah, I would just do my best—whatever that meant for me.
‘First, I need to head back to the capital.’
I peeled my robe from where it was stuck with rubber and threw it over my shoulder.
Just then, the door opened.
“You’re up.”
I turned around at the familiar voice. Roitz stood there holding a sandwich.
“You didn’t leave?”
He walked over and held the sandwich out to my mouth.
I took it without thinking and took a bite.
I looked up at him, my mouth full.
“Did you want me to leave?”
I stared up at his calm face and shook my head.
Roitz placed the rest of the sandwich in my hand and sat by the window while I ate.
When I finished and brushed the crumbs from my hands, he looked at me and said:
“Let’s go, Serdin Bibi.”
He smiled as he said my name.
It was the same calm, comforting smile he used to give me two years ago.
The horses left the village, hooves tapping over flower petals still wet from the rain.
The forest that had been pitch-dark the night before was now bursting with fresh summer green.
Strangely, after last night, Roitz seemed a lot friendlier toward me.
‘What changed his mind so suddenly?’
I couldn’t figure it out.
Was it because I’d offered to sleep in the barn first, out of respect?
But he looked kind of mad after that, didn’t he?
“Serdin.”
Roitz stopped me mid-thought. I pulled the reins and turned around.
Just then, a pale pink petal landed on his head.
It was too far to brush off, so I got off my horse and motioned for him to do the same.
He dismounted, and I reached for his head. A soft breeze full of spring air passed by.
The look in his eyes as he stared at me—it was just like two years ago.
Seeing that again after so long made my heart feel… strange.
Like something was swelling or buzzing inside.
‘Something about this just feels off…’
I reached toward him again, but suddenly froze. His gaze wavered slightly.
He looked down at me as if wondering why I stopped—but I didn’t answer.
Instead, I moved my hand to my waist—toward my sword.
‘…That’s a monster.’
This time, I didn’t freeze because of Roitz. I’d spotted a beast between the thick trees behind him.
I quickly drew my sword and threw it at the beast, shaped like a leopard.
But the moment it hit its stomach—clang!—the blade bounced off.
“…!”
Its skin was tougher than expected. My sword only scratched the surface.
The monster roared and came charging toward us.
‘If it’s just a low-level beast, Roitz should—’
Wait. What am I thinking?
I’m not a trainee anymore. A real knight should be able to handle this.
Roitz started reaching for his sword.
“I’ll do it!” I shouted.
“But your sword…” he began.
“I can do it!”
I cut him off with urgency.
Maybe it looked reckless from his side—but I wanted to show him.
That I’d improved. That I trained so hard thinking of him. That now I could do things like this.
Since becoming his subordinate, I’d only followed behind.
The monster’s heavy footsteps shook the ground as it charged closer.
But I didn’t dodge.
I didn’t back away. I ran toward it.
Roitz paused, probably unsure of what I was doing.
But he didn’t move—he stayed to see it through.
‘This type of monster doesn’t move fast—it relies on strength.’
I remembered what Roitz once taught me: there are two things a fighter needs.
First, the ability to quickly recognize where you’re stronger than your opponent.
Second, the drive to constantly sharpen those strengths.
In terms of raw power, I’d lose.
‘But in terms of speed…’
I kept running straight at the beast.
It let out another roar and charged straight toward me.
Just as we were a few feet apart—
I threw myself to the side, dodging the collision.
Landing and pushing off the ground again, I dashed toward where my sword had fallen.
‘Got it!’
I grabbed it. At the same time, the beast turned and lunged again.
But I was faster—just by a fraction.
I raised the sword in front of me.
The beast slammed into the blade.
With a heavy impact, my sword pierced deep into it—and the red aura that wrapped around it faded.
“Haa…”
I only realized I’d been holding my breath after it was over.
Panting and crouched on the ground, I pulled my sword free and looked up at Roitz.
Lifting my head with a proud smile—
But then, I saw something behind him. Another monster.
“Senior!”
Before I could react, Roitz moved faster.
A shadowy misty beast—Necroquad—appeared behind him and instantly took down the threat.
‘No matter how many times I see it, it’s amazing…’
Roitz brushed dirt off his arm as the Necroquad faded like mist.
But—
‘…his face.’
Roitz’s expression while controlling the Necroquad didn’t look good.
It was like he was in pain—sharp, stabbing pain.
Just for a moment.
If I had looked a second later, I would’ve missed it.
But I was sure.
Roitz felt pain—real pain—while controlling that beast.
“What’s wrong, Serdin?”
That pained expression was gone. He looked completely normal again.
“Ah, it’s nothing.”
I blinked, pretending nothing happened.
‘But that reaction… I’m sure…’
I was reminded again why the original story was considered so tragic.
Roitz’s beast—Necroquad—going out of control.
The trauma of killing his second-in-command during that incident.
And that second-in-command… was me.
‘There were signs before the breakdown, right?’
In his flashback, it was said that Roitz sometimes struggled to control the beast.
That it caused him pain before it finally went berserk.
“Let’s go, Serdin.”
The horses began moving again, hooves splashing over wet flower petals.
As I stared at Roitz’s steady, broad back, I thought:
‘If what I saw wasn’t my imagination…’
Then the beast inside Roitz is slowly starting to lose control.
The very one that might one day lead to my death.
If that’s the case, someone needs to stop it soon.
‘In the original story, the one who removed the beast was the heroine—Luschike.’
No matter what… she needs to show up soon—before it’s too late.
