29. Love and Hate
“Haaah.”
After finishing her meal, Bella stepped outside and let out a deep breath.
She felt as if she were getting deeper and deeper into something bigger. Her heart kept pounding, and her head felt dizzy—it must have been because of that.
“Bella. Don’t you think this is strange?”
“What is?”
Bella tilted her head, not having sensed anything odd.
“The royal family I know wouldn’t ever go so far as to host festivals and games for the commoners.”
“Hmm, true. It’s strange—so much so that it’s honestly a bit unsettling.”
Now that she thought about it, Chei was right. The kingdom was obsessed with competing against other nations to accumulate wealth. To do so, they levied heavy taxes. This sparked backlash from both nobles and commoners, so they had to tinker with the class system.
“If a commoner became rich, they could be elevated to a lower noble rank.” That one sentence was enough for commoners to side with the royal family instead of the nobility. But that was it. Only the wealthy could enjoy the benefits.
The rest of the commoners? They simply had to work endlessly for the country’s wealth, only to hand it over in taxes. So they had no time or resources for festivals or games. And yet here was the royal family, supporting a regional festival for commoners. It was definitely a meaningful signal of something deeper.
“So, what’s the plan for today?”
Chei’s gentle voice broke Bella out of her thoughts.
That low, strangely resonant voice naturally changed the subject.
Bella cleared her throat lightly and adjusted her bag as she picked up the pace. Today was going to be a very, very busy day.
“I need to go see my father first.”
“Do you know where he is? I was just about to ask since you didn’t seem to be looking for him.”
“I do.”
“How?”
“If the gambling house has already colluded with the local guards, where do you think they would have stashed my father?”
“The guard station.”
“Exactly.”
As Bella had predicted, her father was locked up in a cell at the guard post. Once again, the guards opened the way with just a few coins.
Bella approached the bars and called out softly.
“Father.”
A flicker of light returned to the lifeless eyes of the man inside. Suddenly, he sprang up and grabbed the bars with both hands.
He rushed forward so forcefully that Bella instinctively took a step back.
“Bella! I haven’t had a single meal! I’m innocent! They dragged me in out of nowhere—”
“It wasn’t ‘out of nowhere.’”
“Bella?”
Bella was surprised at how cold her voice sounded.
Unlike when she used to see him return home after losing money, the father she saw yesterday… was a man begging in a gambling den, clinging to someone’s pants leg for just one more round.
She was far more disappointed than she had thought.
“The money I gave you—what did you use it for?”
“Ah, of course for food—”
“But you said you haven’t eaten a single meal.”
A heavy silence fell between the bars.
Her father shifted his eyes, searching for a response, before hardening his face into a scowl.
“So what, you’re here to interrogate your dying father about what he spent money on?! We may have severed ties, but still—I raised you! How could you do this to me?!”
Bella’s quiet voice cut through his shouting like a blade.
“I remember. You used to teach me swordsmanship with a wooden blade. In winter, we’d go hunting together. You cried like a child when I gave you that horribly embroidered handkerchief and said it made you happy.”
“……”
His expression went blank, like someone who had suddenly been hit with a wave of long-forgotten memories.
Maybe now he remembered.
Bella never forgot. Not even for a moment.
The calloused, strong hands that taught her how to use a sword. The big man who gave her a cute rabbit plushie.
Bella stepped closer to the bars. Their matching violet eyes locked.
“Father. The greatest happiness in my life, and the worst misfortune in my life—”
“B-Bella…”
“They’re both you.”
With those words, Bella turned away without hesitation.
Her father reached out desperately, trying to grab his daughter.
“Bella, please get me out of here! I have somewhere I must go!”
“To that man named Carlton or whatever?”
“…H-How do you know that?!”
He trembled in terror at the mere mention of Carlton’s name.
“He’s dead. That man. Money killed him.”
Bella’s voice was chillingly cold as she informed him that the mid-level manager of the gambling house was dead.
“Dead…?”
“Yes. The gambling den is gone now, Father. So just stay quietly in that cell. Until everything is over.”
“Lord Carlton… dead? That’s impossible… why? How? Bella, how do you know all this?”
He muttered in disbelief, eyes vacant.
Bella was about to walk away but bit her lip.
She knew it was a petty feeling. Her father had his own wounds, his own pain. But that didn’t ease Bella’s.
She curled her lips into a bitter, exaggerated smile.
“How do you think a woman could even enter that gambling den?”
His eyes widened as the realization struck. He let out a horrible scream and yanked at his own hair.
“…Bella! No! No, Bella! Please! Tell me it’s not true!”
“I’ll be back. The daughter you loved, bringing the money you loved even more. I’ll come back.”
As Bella walked away, her father clawed at the bars so hard his skin tore, screaming after her.
“Bella! Bella! Please! Don’t go, my child! Bella! Please!”
Bella staggered slightly after stepping outside but quickly regained her balance.
“Why did you do that, Bella?”
“Do you want to scold me for lying?”
She asked, though she knew Chei would never do that. He was not the kind of person to scold her.
As expected, his gentle voice settled softly in her ear.
“No. I just want to know why you didn’t deny it.”
Maybe because his voice was too kind—Bella felt her eyes grow hot and shook her head furiously. She didn’t want to cry here, not like this.
“I don’t know. I don’t know why I did that in that moment, either.”
She buried her face in her hands and quickly moved away from the guard building. Passersby glanced her way, but she couldn’t care less.
She felt completely broken.
When she decided to come south, this wasn’t what she wanted.
“You still love him, don’t you? Look at yourself—you’re the one who hurt him, yet you’re the one who looks hurt.”
It struck a nerve.
Bella had spoken the cruel words, yet she was the one who ended up wounded.
Eventually, she stopped walking and stared blankly around. She had wandered a bit from the festival and was now in a quieter area.
She figured it was for the best and slumped down under a large tree.
The sky was needlessly clear, and the birdsong was annoyingly beautiful.
Bella stared blankly at the sky, then turned her gaze to the bracelet Chei resided in.
“I wanted my father to feel even a fraction of the pain I’ve gone through before I come back. To see someone you loved—your most precious, proud family—fall apart. How painful and agonizing that is. That’s why I didn’t correct him.”
Chei looked at her red, swollen eyes and sighed.
“Bella… I don’t have a physical body, so I can’t hug you.”
“It’s okay.”
His heartfelt words alone were a comfort.
Bella had learned just how rare and precious such people were once she entered the real world.
“Even if you’re hurt and crying, there’s nothing I can do for you…”
She could hear the regret in Chei’s voice.
Maybe only Chei truly knew what was in his heart.
“Just having someone I can cry in front of… that’s more than enough, Chei. Thank you. Really… thank you.”
“Bella. It’s okay to cry more. I’ll stay with you as long as you need.”
Bella shook her head with a smile.
“No. It’s time to go catch more bad guys.”
“Already? Can’t you rest for just a day?”
“There’s another gambling den opening in the next town tonight. I have to go. That’s where I’ll find evidence linking to Count Treshi.”
Bella stood up and dusted off her skirt before marching forward with resolve.
Chei didn’t need her to say anything—he could sense her condition better than anyone. Her heartbeat had returned to normal. Her breathing was steady again. Her once-shaken heart had found calm.
But in truth, her condition was steadily deteriorating.
Chei could feel it clearly.
She had once enjoyed being able to leave the mansion, but now she just wanted this over with so she could go home. There were too many things draining her.
The more emotionally shaken she became, the more she walked into dark places…
The more vulnerable the human body became.
“Bella. Nobles trust no one. They’re cowards. They can’t stand even the smallest losses.”
“Really?”
Bella didn’t pick up on the hint and kept flipping through her notebook as she walked.
“Exactly. That’s why it must exist.”
“…?”
Finally sensing something, Bella turned toward him.
Even though she could only hear his voice, it felt like he was standing right in front of her.
“The black ledger. Find it.”
Somehow, the bracelet even seemed to shine blue—just like his eyes.
