Chapter : 9
I carefully avoided the countless gazes within the imperial palace, and even when I was occasionally noticed, I boldly ignored them and safely made my way to the Crown Princeās training ground.
I hid behind the wall at the entrance of the training ground and watched the Crown Prince observing the knightsā training.
Wow! Look at that body. A work of art.
So handsome, my male lead!
How long had I been staring, completely captivated?
When should I let him know Iām here?
I need to enter the training ground as naturally as possible.
As I hesitated, trying to find the right moment to rush in, I suddenly felt something cold and metallic touch my neck.
Oh my god!
Could it be⦠a sword?
It was a sword! A real sword!
I froze in shock.
āWhoās there?!ā
āā¦ā¦ā
Would you be able to speak with a sword pointed at your neck? My mouth froze, unable to move.
The rough voice of the man, who appeared to be a knight, drew the attention of everyone in the training ground to the entrance where I stood.
And among those gazes was Calixās.
When my eyes met Calixās, I sent him a pleading look.
āCalix! Itās me, Kaelin Brockburk! Tell him to move the sword!ā
But despite my desperate gaze, Calixās face grew even colder than when our eyes first met, and his brows furrowed further.
Whatās wrong with his expression?
āWho are you? Why are you spying on the knightsā training?ā
The knight, pointing his sword at me, shouted boldly and tried to press it closer.
No! If he does that, heāll actually stab my neck!
āIām Kaelin! Kaelin Brockburk!ā
I shouted with all my strength.
Even my own ears caught the cracking of my voice.
āBrockburk?ā
The knightās eyes widened as he repeated my words.
No one in this empire didnāt know the name Brockburk.
Got it? I am Kaelin Brockburk, precious daughter of Duke Brockburk, the Chancellor of Everetian!
āIām Kaelin Brockburk. I came to see Crown Prince Calix.ā
I babbled on.
My plan to pretend I got lost and accidentally arrived at the training ground was a complete failure.
The knightās sword still hadnāt moved from my neck.
But his gaze was fixed on Calix.
When Calix met the knightās eyes and nodded slightly, as if confirming my identity, the sword finally moved away from my neck.
The moment the sword left, I collapsed, my entire body trembling.
A swordā¦
Of course, swords appear in romance fantasy novels.
I even wrote that Iād die from such a sword.
But feeling a sword pointed at my neck in real life⦠the fear was beyond words.
And now I was supposed to die from it?
No!
Absolutely not!
Even trembling on the ground, I promised myself I could not die from this sword.
Calix approached me.
When Calix reached right in front of me and the knight, the knight stepped back.
āYour Highness! Is this truly the young lady of the Brockburk family?ā
Yes, it is!
Canāt you tell from my elegant dress, my beautiful face, my fair skin?
Calix ignored the knightās question and looked down at me.
āKaelin Brockburk, what are you doing here?ā
āI⦠I meanā¦ā
I wanted to say I got lost⦠but I couldnāt, since Iād been caught spying.
Calix was still waiting for my answer.
Why ask something so obvious?
I should just be thanked for showing up!
No choice. I had to be a bit more straightforward.
āI⦠came to see Your Highness, Calix.ā
āWhy me?ā
His voice sounded strangely cold.
Why�
When will you finally drop your cold act and pour out your passionate love?
Itās taking forever.
Youāve liked me for years already.
Love is something you have to seize.
You look so dignified, yet so timidā¦
Ugh!
My heart was pounding, frustrated.
āI⦠umā¦ā
ā?ā
āI came to let you know⦠that Your Highness may love me if you want to.ā
This sounded strange even as I said it.
Because I didnāt reveal my feelings, I had to blatantly tell him to love meā¦
But my voice was so small that I could barely hear myself.
āWhat did you say?ā
Calix, too, seemed unable to hear me clearly.
āIā¦.ā
No!
I snapped back to my senses before finishing.
Saying āYou may love meā felt far too audacious to say to the Crown Prince.
āā¦What?ā
āNo, Your Highness. Thatās not it⦠I just came to say that you donāt have to hide your feelings from me, that itās okay to show me your love.ā
Itās okay to like me, itās okay to obsess over me.
Iām ready. Iām ready to accept your intensely possessive love.
Calix frowned and asked:
āYou mean the feelings youāre speaking of⦠are they my feelings?ā
Of course, theyāre yours!
āI think even obsessive, scary love counts as love. Ah! Of course, ādying of loveā doesnāt work. Thatās just a metaphor. Love shouldnāt kill; it should protect, right?ā
Donāt kill just because the love isnāt reciprocated. Just express love.
I am no longer the Kaelin who only had unrequited love.
I am the new Kaelin who, at least, can pretend to love you.
āLady.ā
There was a slight tremor in his voice.
Finally, he seemed to understand my words and be moved.
āYes, Your Highness!ā
āWhy tell me such things?ā
āHuh?ā
What are you talking about?
Why tell you? Because itās you.
āSorry, but Iām not interested in that kind of love. I think Iād be better at killing people than loving like that.ā
What�!
Why are you so terrifying?
Iām telling you itās okay to love me, and Iāll accept you.
What do you mean, youād be better at killing?
Do you mean youāll love me to death?
Do you mean to kill me and preserve me forever?
Donāt kill me, please!
Youāre threatening to kill me?!
My heart jumped wildly at his terrifying possessiveness.
Suddenly, Calix turned and shouted:
āRajif!ā
Rajif?
Before I could wonder, a man called Rajif ran toward Calix.
Ah!!!
It was the deputy commander of the knights.
The knight who had been surveilling our house last time.
Yes, it was Rajif.
Only then did I remember that the deputy commander, Calixās right-hand man, was named Rajif.
What was his last name?
I tried recalling it as he ran toward me, but couldnāt remember.
āYes, Your Highness!ā
Calix said to Rajif, who had arrived in an instant:
āThe young lady of the Brockburk family is leaving. Escort her!ā
Leaving?
Not dying, just really going home?
Please, male lead, keep it to love and obsession, donāt kill!
I looked at Calix with desperate eyes, but he was already walking toward the center of the training ground.
Completely ignoring my gaze.
What now?
Seeing me must be so painful that he wants to possess me forever⦠or is he planning his obsession more strategically?
His overtly dark, intense, and violent personality had clearly become more refined.
Why is it different from what I wrote?
If heās suppressing it now, it might be even scarier when his obsession explodesā¦
This is serious.
Do I need to openly tell him I love him, not just allow his love?
My worries deepened.
Calix shook his head, thinking of the daughter of Duke Brockburk, who said crazy things again.
Even if the girl wasnāt sane, he couldnāt refuse Leonās insistence on marrying herāmaybe thatās why the Duke aligned with the Empress.
āShe is pretty, thoughā¦ā
āDamn it!ā
Calix scolded himself for being surprised by his own thoughts.
Pretty? What use is it if a crazy girl is pretty?
āI think obsessive, scary love also counts as loveā¦ā
Recalling her terrifying words made his chest tighten.
Was the Duke spying on him using his daughter? Or was she serious about that insane love?
āCould that lady really love me so crazily? Wants to have me so badly she says ādonāt kill meā? No, that makes no sense. Wanting to kill me for Leon is more reasonable.ā
Deep furrows appeared on Calixās brow.
āEven Duke Brockburk has a weak spot⦠His only daughter isnāt saneā¦ā
For the first time, Calix felt some sympathy for the Duke, who constantly threatened his throne.
Returning home, I reflected on the situation.
āSorry, but Iām not interested in that kind of love. Iād be better at killing people than loving like that.ā
Better at killing than love?
What? A sadist?
I didnāt write him that way.
Calixās violence toward Kaelin wasnāt because he enjoyed killing or wanted to possess her forever. It was partly because she had opposed him and even cursed him after Leonās death.
So why has he become so terrifying?
Even more terrifying than before.
āLove is completed by killing the loved oneā?
No wonder Kaelin didnāt like you!
Kaelin liked gentle Leon, while Calix was cold, four years older, and intimidating.
She never imagined that the dark, scary Calix would slowly harbor feelings for her.
Calixās heart had been captivated by Kaelin since he was fifteen and she was eleven.