Chapter 8
There was no reason why the maids of the Count Alanttra household should be treated better than those of the Grand Duke of Riverstar’s estate.
Yet, if they were calling each other “madam maid” as if honoring one another, it was proof of how much authority she had allowed them.
Why had she done that?
Surely, she hadn’t been fond of them. Even after marriage, had she still been unable to escape her father’s shadow?
Shy clicked her tongue inwardly at the thought that she still craved even the faintest trace of defiance that lingered within her.
The little girl inside her, it seemed, still could not let go of her attachment, even after being betrayed.
Servants empowered by their master tended to swagger about as if they themselves were the master. They must have enjoyed that privilege to the fullest here.
Disgusting.
Her expression soured.
Betty, who had worn her late mother’s ring while smiling smugly…
Jacqueline, who would report her every move if there was money to be made…
And worst of all—Dera.
“In times like these, you should say: ‘I was wrong. Please save me.’ Come on, repeat it. Politely.”
The words she had been forced to say to survive.
After hearing her reply, Dera had chuckled and patted her head gently.
“Good girl.”
Shy’s face darkened in an instant.
Seeing her expression, Rosa gasped and quickly prostrated herself on the floor.
“Please forgive my slip of the tongue!”
To elevate another servant before one’s master was a serious mistake. In any normal circumstance, Shy would have sternly corrected Rosa’s error, but right now, what she needed was information.
Composing her face, Shy spoke kindly to Rosa.
“Rosa, I’ll have a lot of questions for you from now on. Stay by my side and tell me how I used to behave before. Or, even without being asked, you may tell me things just like you did today.”
Then, in a tone that was gentle yet firm, she added:
“But you should know one thing—no matter how I behaved in the past, I will not act that way from now on. So you’ll have to adapt.”
She smiled warmly at Rosa, who was still frozen stiff.
“First, could you bring me a warm wet towel and some light refreshments?”
She wasn’t actually hungry. She simply thought that once Rosa moved about, she might loosen up a little.
“Yes, madam. Understood. While I’m away, should I call another maid to attend you?”
“No, that’s fine. I’m sure they’re all waiting outside anyway. I’ll call if I need someone, so go on.”
Rosa bowed at a full ninety degrees and left the room.
✦✦✦
As she stepped out for her errand, Rosa tapped her lips anxiously with trembling fingers.
“Share a room with him? Do you have a death wish? And now a string of blunders on top of that!”
Her nervousness had made her commit several mistakes she’d never made before. And the mistress’s beauty—enchanting even to another woman—had only made it worse.
She clenched her trembling hands again and again to steady herself.
It had only been five months since she’d entered this household, and yet she had become the personal maid to the notorious Grand Duchess of Riverstar. She still couldn’t believe it.
When the others heard she was to be the personal maid, faint sighs of relief had escaped them. Some looked at her with pity for taking on this unlucky role, others with relief, and still others with detached indifference.
Five months was not a long time, but it was enough to read the atmosphere of a house, no matter how large and sprawling.
The mistress of Riverstar was infamous.
From the very start of her marriage, she had a habit of seizing on the smallest faults to throw objects. She didn’t beat her servants directly, but she acted as if even beating them was a waste of her time.
Changing the water over ten times just to get the perfect morning wash temperature was routine. She would reject steaming dishes with just a flick of her eyes without tasting a bite.
And the extravagance—astounding.
In just one year of marriage, she had acquired an immense amount of jewelry. She bought dresses as well, but the cost of those was nothing compared to the jewels and ornaments she collected.
Shy, once Lady Shy of Count Alanttra, now the Grand Duchess of Riverstar, had scoffed with a wicked smile, saying she preferred stones that never lost their beauty to clothes that would wear out.
And yet, despite it all, she was breathtakingly beautiful.
Beauty that captured anyone’s gaze instantly.
Her shimmering golden hair retained its luster even when tousled. Her lake-like eyes, elegant and lovely, shone like deep blue jewels.
And it wasn’t just her face—her perfectly balanced figure could inspire admiration even from another woman.
Depending on her expression, she could appear refined, innocent, or, at times, like a seductive temptress—an ever-changing allure.
She was not kind to the Grand Duke either—rather, she was cold and heartless.
And yet, ironically, she never refused to share his bed. In fact, unlike other nobles, they even shared a room.
When she moved into the Duke’s chamber entirely, she was said to have smiled and remarked:
“Better to enjoy ourselves a little than waste time going back and forth, isn’t it?”
The meaning was obvious. She was a woman who thought only of her own pleasure and benefit.
As an apprentice maid, Rosa had only heard stories like these—until recently, she had never been close enough to see the lady in person.
And now she was expected to care for her entirely alone for the time being. The burden weighed heavily.
Yet the atmosphere of the mistress now felt entirely different.
Before, she had always seemed sharp-edged and dissatisfied with everything. But now…
“Strict… but gentle and kind.”
Perhaps that was why she found herself answering so readily to the constant questions. But if she refused to answer honestly, she feared what might happen later.
Rosa could not afford to lose this job—she worked for her family’s sake.
She thought of the lady’s gentle words:
“From now on, I’ll behave differently.”
In some ways, that was more difficult to face than her past tantrums.
✦✦✦
Shy pressed the warm, steamed towel Rosa had brought over her entire face. She deliberately leaned back against the sofa rather than lying down, knowing she would drift off again if she lay flat.
The effort of thinking had made her not-yet-healed head throb.
The bleeding had stopped, but she still had bandages. She wasn’t supposed to get them wet, but she figured a steamed towel would soothe rather than harm.
Should she call her nursemaid?
At the thought of the nursemaid, a warm feeling rose in her chest.
The woman had been with the Alanttra family since Shy’s mother was a young lady. She had not originally been Shy’s nursemaid, but since she had once worked as one, she had taken on that role for Shy.
She had always cared for her with such love and devotion that, though not related by blood, she felt like family.
If her maternal grandmother had been alive, Shy imagined it would have felt something like this.
Her paternal grandparents were still alive, but they had doted only on her brother, Lucaldo, never sparing Shy even a glance.
No child could remain unshaken under such looks—like she was a child who should never have been born.
I was also of the Alanttra bloodline, but they treated only Lucaldo as if his blood were special.
Would it have been easier if they had simply ignored her?
Feeling their hatred and contempt in their eyes was like being stabbed with thorns.
When she was younger, her father and brother might have ignored her, but at least they did nothing worse. Back then, she still tried to win her grandparents’ favor—acting sweet or pretending to be a good girl.
But she soon learned.
No matter what she did, they would not be moved. If she dropped something, she was scolded or glared at; if Lucaldo did the same, they would rush to make sure he wasn’t hurt.
Once, Lucaldo had broken an expensive vase in the hallway and blamed it on her. They had scolded her severely, and when a maid later hinted it had been Lucaldo, they hadn’t even apologized.
Instead, they told Lucaldo that such boldness would make him a great man one day.
Her mother and nursemaid were the only ones who soothed her resentment and sadness.
At least when her mother was present, her grandparents would restrain themselves from treating her as harshly as when she was alone.
Without those two, I might never have become a decent person.
So she thought—until she remembered her own deeds in the Riverstar Grand Duke’s mansion, and her spirits sank.
Suddenly—
Light flooded her vision.
The towel covering her face had been pulled away by someone.
Without opening her eyes, Shy murmured softly:
“Taking it away already? I could keep it on a bit longer…”
“If you leave it on too long, it gets stifling. And moisture isn’t good for the wound.”
The voice of the Grand Duke of Riverstar.
Shy’s eyes flew open. Above her still-reclined face was a large, strong hand—
And the Grand Duke, gazing down at her.
She was the first to avert her eyes from his straight, steady gaze—not because his sharp features frightened her, but because she couldn’t bear the weight of those crimson eyes.
She had no memory of him at all, while he might know her through and through. That thought embarrassed her.
And from the little she did know, she doubted she had been a good wife. Awkwardly, she changed the subject.
“You could have had a maid do this.”
That’s when she noticed Rosa was gone. As she looked around for her, Benjamin answered first:
“I sent her away, Shy.”
