Chapter : 32
This doesn’t sound like a joke.
It almost felt like wordplay.
But when I looked more closely, Hayden’s eyes—usually honed sharp as a blade—seemed oddly softened. Even the corners of his tightly set lips looked like they had lifted slightly.
Was he… genuinely worried about me?
I narrowed my eyes and asked casually,
“Be honest. You’re trying to run away here because of Karen too, aren’t you?”
Hayden, who had been looking down at me, curved his eyes gently.
“On days like this, please pretend you don’t notice, at least.”
How sly.
In the end, I let out a light sigh and gave him permission.
“Do whatever you want. While you’re at it, bring me some newspapers. You have some, don’t you?”
“I do have a few saved here and there, but why newspapers?”
“Well.”
I walked over to Hayden’s desk and picked up a quill from the pen holder as if it were my own.
“I want to fold paper hats and play around. Maybe doodle on the photos too.”
“…Then at least tell me what kind of information you want me to look for.”
“You said you only had them scattered around, didn’t you? No need to sort. Bring all of them.”
If it was Hayden, I knew he would have gathered nothing but the information I wanted anyway.
“Honestly.”
He clicked his tongue with an unwilling expression. After finally giving him a break, he probably wanted to complain that I was making him run personal errands.
I didn’t care. When I urged him to hurry and shoved him lightly from behind, he reluctantly moved.
Once I confirmed that Hayden had left, I pulled a notebook out of my bag.
The first pages were packed with notes—major and minor events that would unfold between the Empire and the Temple, along with a list of new connections I needed to build.
“I thought restarting would make everything easy…”
Even with divine grace, it seemed life couldn’t be lived on easy mode.
As if I didn’t already have enough to do, now I had to keep up with newspapers too.
Holding my pen, I began writing down every single trivial memory I had once thought useless.
When I was deep into it, Hayden returned carrying a thick bundle of documents and a large leather bag.
“You’re back? That took quite a while.”
I checked the clock as I spoke. Hayden simply nodded.
He set the large bag down on my desk, then placed his documents beside it.
“This should be enough. But why are your documents here?”
“I still had luggage left.”
He answered casually and quickly left again.
Moments later, Hayden returned—this time carrying two more bags, each about the same size as the first.
No, that’s way more than I need…
My face twisted naturally as I stared at the bags, stuffed to the brim with newspapers.
“Have you been waiting your whole life for a chance to brag about your newspaper-collecting hobby?”
“I did say there were quite a lot.”
This wasn’t “quite a lot.” It was absurd.
When I was left speechless, Hayden lifted his chin and added something I hadn’t even asked.
“I had a hard time bringing all of this here.”
“……”
I shot him a sideways glance, letting my irritation show.
“Good work.”
“Yes.”
Despite the lukewarm exchange, the corner of Hayden’s mouth was unmistakably curled upward as he returned to his seat.
I clicked my tongue softly and began skimming through the newspapers, digging through my memories as I went.
“Haa…”
After pushing away the stack of newspapers I’d been glued to for two hours, Hayden—who was flipping through documents at the work desk—asked without even looking up,
“Finished reading?”
“No. But I don’t need to read any more.”
Skimming through two or three years’ worth of papers was enough to confirm it.
This place was another world almost identical to my past.
So identical that it was harder to find differences than similarities.
There had been minor shifts among families holding idle posts, but major incidents—their order, and even the names of those involved—were exactly the same. My own scandals matched word for word, so Hayden’s must have too.
That’s what makes this so strange.
The sharp tip of my pen poked at the name Blanchett printed in the paper.
What is this, really? Blier.
There was no one around me living a life more different from the one I remembered than you.
She had never been interested in politics—yet here she was, a member of the Noble Assembly.
The one person I absolutely have to kill is sitting in the one position I can’t touch.
With the imperial family already locked in constant power struggles, assassinating a central noble recklessly would only ignite another political war.
Unless I had definitive proof that she was a follower of the God of Darkness.
“Ah—Hayden!”
Unlike my urgency, he replied calmly, as if he’d been waiting.
“Go ahead.”
“…I haven’t said anything yet. How did you know?”
“Weren’t you asking me to listen?”
A sigh wasn’t something I’d done on purpose.
As I looked embarrassed, he wiped ink from his pen and asked again,
“What is it?”
“I wanted to ask about holy artifacts. Is there one that can perfectly identify followers of the God of Darkness?”
It would be even better if it could be used without the target noticing.
But Hayden shook his head before I even finished.
“No such thing exists in this world.”
“Then what about making one?”
“……”
He deliberately avoided looking at me, probably afraid I’d ask him to make it.
“It’s impossible. Divine power and mana are natural forces. No detection device could distinguish whether the divine power filling this room belongs to me, to you, or to nature itself.”
“Hm. Is that so?”
True enough. Even future Hayden had struggled to track down a demon priest who was truly hiding. If a holy artifact capable of detecting them existed, he would’ve made it long ago.
And having mana didn’t automatically make someone a demon priest either.
If relying on tools alone is too risky…
As I tapped my lips with my fingertips, a thin sound escaped me.
“Hayden. Then how about this? A holy artifact imbued with will—one that can tell whether the mana nearby is natural or human-made.”
Hayden wet his finger, flipped over a used page, and picked up his pen.
As he scribbled a signature, he muttered,
“If you succeed in making something like that, the Grand Temple will recognize you as a high-ranking priest. I’ll support you.”
“…You’re seriously awful.”
“I answered because you asked. Why the insults?”
Did he think I was him? Couldn’t even tell I was being sarcastic.
I crossed my arms and turned my head away from him.
Still… if my memories were combined with the spirits’ power, even Hayden might be able to create a higher-level holy artifact.
Should I tell him about the future and ask for his help?
But in that moment, images of the disasters Hayden had caused in the previous world flashed through my mind like a gallery.
Once he set his mind on something, he never compromised.
In the end, he gambled both our lives—and his own—to save the world.
No. That wouldn’t do.
Without hesitation, I discarded the “Hayden” card entirely.
“Haa… huu. What do I do now…”
“Lady.”
A quiet warning came from beside me, but I couldn’t stop the sigh.
Did he ever feel like he needed my help too?
I’d never truly opened my heart to him, so there was no way to know.
Still, I vaguely remembered a time when Hayden had said things were hard for him.
Only once.
It must have been when his mentor—his family—High Priest Shama passed away.
He’d said that now there was no one left who truly understood him, and that he felt a little lonely.
That was our sixth year together.
When I rested my cheek against the back of my left hand, Hayden’s profile came into view.
He seemed to be writing something lengthy—the quill in his hand moved without pause.
Perhaps because he felt gentler than I remembered, Hayden looked especially young today in his white silk shirt and pale blue cravat.
It was hard to reconcile this version of him with the future Hayden I knew.
His expression hardened again. He seemed fine when we were eating earlier.
No—if I thought about it, Hayden always looked like that. Rarely smiling, never joking, his face perpetually shadowed.
Maybe, when we were together, he had been just as tense as I was.
Light streamed in through the window, spilling over the young Hayden’s shoulders.
It was just light—yet cradled in it, Hayden looked strangely warm.
“……”
For a moment, his slightly hunched shoulders overlapped with the image of someone who always stood stubbornly upright.
The instant I realized whose afterimage it was, my lips parted slowly.
“Hayden.”
At my call, the faint crease between his snow-white brows loosened.
He lifted his head with a puzzled look, and I stared straight at him.
“Um… I’m sorry.”
Unlike me, who bit my lower lip after speaking, he simply blinked in confusion.
Judging by his mouth shape, he seemed to be saying, “Pardon?”
“Are you talking to me…?”
“…Is there anyone else here besides us?”
Avoiding Hayden’s flustered face, I licked my drying lips with my tongue.
