NRAL | Chapter 74

~Chapter 74~

Nora’s Reason

Now, everything felt like it was finally coming together.

Eleanor finally understood why Nora always looked uncomfortable whenever Luke was mentioned. Why she hated Eleanor so deeply—even though Eleanor had done nothing wrong.

“Why did she do it? We were close. Even though there was a big age gap, we promised to stay together forever—because we were each other’s only family left in this world.
But then… why did she leave me without saying a word?”

Nora tilted her head with a frown, as if she still didn’t understand even after all these years.

“She never came looking for me, not even once—not even when I could’ve died. Why did she choose to save and raise you?”

Her unfocused eyes, drifting up and down, locked sharply onto Eleanor. The emptiness in her violet eyes started to burn with hatred again.

“You had everything from the beginning. A noble status. A house where you never had to shiver in the cold or starve. Me? I had nothing—no warm shelter, no food—only one thing in the world: my sister. And even she abandoned me… for you. Why? Why did she choose you?”

Eleanor couldn’t say anything. Her lips stayed tightly sealed.

Luke was Nora’s real sister. The younger sibling Luke said she had left behind in her hometown… was Nora.

Even if she and Nora were somehow connected by fate, this was too much—far too cruel for a coincidence.

“Misery? You think you know what real misery is? Imagine, Eleanor—a four-year-old child losing her only family overnight. How do you think she survives?”

“…”

“Working like a slave in strangers’ houses all day, getting beaten for no real reason, eating rock-hard bread and making it last for days. In winter, plunging my hands into freezing water, and in summer, working under the blazing sun. I finally escaped after years of that hell—only to live in fear every day that someone might assault or kill me from behind. Being insulted, harassed, and violated was just normal. That was my life.”

Nora suddenly poured out the pain she’d bottled up for the past seven years. Her chest heaved with ragged breaths as she tried to catch her breath.

Eleanor, now calmer, simply looked at her quietly.

That calmness only made Nora angrier. She let out a short, bitter laugh.

“That’s what real suffering is. Wearing fancy dresses and crying because your father scolded you, or because a stupid dog died—that’s not suffering.”

She continued in a quiet voice, lost in her memories.

It was autumn, about a few months after Nora first came to the Astria estate seven years ago.

After a walk, Eleanor returned to her room—only to find the body of a dog hanging from the ceiling.

It was probably one of Damien’s cruel tricks. He had a habit of doing awful things just to bother Eleanor.

Eleanor always responded indifferently. Whether it was a new dress ruined in the mud, or a gift from her father mysteriously going missing—her lady never reacted with anything more than a sigh.

So Nora thought this time would be the same.

But this time… Eleanor’s reaction was completely different.

“No! No! Oliver—!”

She screamed and rushed to pull the dog’s body down. Holding the corpse in her arms, she sobbed uncontrollably, she didn’t care about the dirt or the blood soaking into its fur—she just kept holding it.

Nora already knew Eleanor loved that dog. She had seen her crouch beside it often.

But Nora didn’t care what bond they had.

She only remembered how Eleanor grieved for days after the incident, looking miserable and lost.

“Crying over a dog? Seriously? I couldn’t believe it.”

In Nora’s world, death was an everyday thing. A child she’d played with yesterday might die today—but you couldn’t cry. If you did, you’d be punished. You might go hungry. You might even die yourself.

But Eleanor… she cried like the world had ended over a dog.

That filled Nora with disgust.

Eleanor had no idea how lucky she was. She didn’t realize what a blessed life she had. She didn’t even try to understand.

When Eleanor complained about her beautiful dress or sweet desserts or fairy-tale fiancé, Nora wanted to rip out her spoiled, pink tongue.

And when she found out Eleanor had once lived in an orphanage… it only made her angrier.

“How come even in an orphanage, you found someone who cared for you? Was it because you have noble blood? Is that why you were able to overcome every hardship so easily?”

“Then what about me? Born low, abandoned by the only family I had… does that mean I’m doomed to suffer forever?”

For the first time, Nora realized how unfair and revolting the difference between them was. She hated everything—especially her own fate.

And that hatred grew even stronger when she learned who Eleanor’s “benefactor” had been.

“Her name was Luke. She was twelve years older than me and a devout follower of the Triton faith. You reminded me of her. Her hair was golden like yours, though her eyes were blue. She was so beautiful and kind…”

After hearing that name again and again, Nora finally understood.

“So my sister left me to save you. Because you were so precious, so noble… she threw me into hell and chose you instead.”

And so, in the end… Nora made up her mind.

She decided she would take the life of that girl who had everything yet was never satisfied. Eleanor had taken everything from her—so Nora would take everything from Eleanor.

That was Nora’s reason.

“…I see.”

Eleanor, who had been listening quietly, finally opened her mouth.

Yes—if that’s the reason, she could understand Nora.

 To someone who lived in pain after being abandoned by her sister, Eleanor’s definition of “misery” must have sounded like nothing more than spoiled complaints.

Just as Eleanor didn’t know Nora’s reasons, Nora didn’t know Eleanor’s, either.

“Nora, I don’t want to compete with you about whose life was more miserable.”

Eleanor gently removed Nora’s hand from her knee.

 Nora had been scratching at her leg the whole time she spoke, and now there were faint traces of blood.

“I don’t understand either. Why did Luke leave her little sister and come to the Merilbone orphanage? Why did she take care of me instead of you? But that was her choice. And whatever kind of life you lived because of it—I don’t feel any guilt.”

As if brushing away dust, Eleanor pushed Nora’s hand aside and stood up.

“If you were hoping I’d say something like, ‘That’s so sad,’ or, ‘I’m sorry,’ then I’m afraid that’s not going to happen. We’ve come too far to the point where we can pity each other.”

She nodded, as if moved by her own words.

“Yes. We’ve come too far. If, from the beginning, you had just come to me and said, ‘Give me your name. Give me your life,’ then maybe I would’ve handed it over and walked away—peacefully, without all this mess. Or if you had revealed from the start that you were Luke’s sister and asked for something in return, I would’ve gladly given it. To repay what I owed her.”

Just as she had patiently waited for Nora to finish speaking, Nora now listened quietly without interrupting.

 Thanks to that, Eleanor was able to finish what she wanted to say without hesitation.

“But you didn’t do any of that. Instead, you made me your enemy a long time ago. So now, regardless of your reasons, or what led you to hate me… I can only treat you as an enemy too.”

“…”

“I’ll pray… that you really mean it when you say this kind of thing doesn’t count as ‘misery.’ That even after I’m gone, your feelings won’t change. That’s the last kindness I can offer you.”

***

Tap, tap, tap—

The sound of quick heels echoed loudly down the hallway.

Eleanor walked briskly, her eyes empty like she didn’t see anything at all.

But all throughout the walk from the dining room back to her room, Luke’s face lingered in her mind.

Tap-tap, tap-tap!

With every step forward, that image of Luke started to change.

 Younger, softer—but sharper and more bitter.

And before she knew it, it was Nora’s face she was seeing in her mind.

Bang!

Eleanor slammed the door shut as she entered her bedroom.

Luckily, the room was empty.

 Hilda had left at Mary’s call, and Ernst had gone to investigate the deaths of those who worked in the Astria estate years ago.

That was a relief. If they had seen her face, they would’ve been terribly worried.

Even though she acted calm in front of Nora, Eleanor’s emotions were a tangled mess.

She had successfully carried out her first revenge.

 She should have been enjoying a sense of satisfaction—planning her next move. But what she had just learned left her completely unsettled.

‘Even if Nora is Luke’s real sister, nothing changes. That doesn’t affect my decision.’

She kept telling herself that.

 But the guilt… wouldn’t go away.

If Luke were alive to see what was happening now, what would she say?

 Surely, she’d be disappointed. She’d say, “I saved you, and now you’ve brought pain to my own sister.”

 She might even regret saving Eleanor in the first place.

Useless “what-ifs” like words wrapped tightly around Eleanor’s throat.

She reached up with both hands, clutching her neck.

 Even though there was no nec klace, it felt like she was suffocating.

And in that moment… one man’s face came to her mind.

The man who always showed up just in time—who always helped her breathe again:

Carsian.

“You’re not to blame. You hold no responsibility for any of this.”

Would he say that to her again?

Would he reassure her again that she had done nothing wrong, that she didn’t need to suffer?

For some reason, she believed he would. And with that belief came a sudden, overwhelming impulse.

‘Should I go to his townhouse right now?’

It was a ridiculous thought.

She hadn’t arranged a meeting with Madam Corcos, so there was no way he’d be in the capital. He was too busy with his duties in Royster to always be in the capital.

Besides, her legs were still too injured for her to travel.

 Even walking to the dining room had been a painful struggle. The wounds hadn’t even scabbed over yet.

So going up and down a carriage, just to chase someone who might not even be there…

 It was irrational. It wasn’t something someone like her—who prided herself on logic—would ever do.

But even though she knew all that… Eleanor ran out of the room.

Because the heat rising in her chest—the impulse—was too strong to ignore.

 And she hoped that by chasing it, she might find the answer.