IRATBP Chapter 14

Chapter 14

“I wasn’t planning to punish you anyway.”

It was an unexpected answer. Asha, who was beside me, seemed surprised as well.

“What? But…”

“Fiana Lucianos.”

His voice growled. The moment I crossed the line, it felt like he might tear my throat out. It was terrifying.

Was he trying to threaten me now?

My whole body tensed up. But again, he said something unexpected.

“This place might feel bleak to you, but it’s a precious place to me.”

His words made my chest ache, and the hand holding my stick trembled.

So, my guess was right.

I had basically stormed into his personal space with dirty feet, just to uncover his secrets.

But even then… When I touched that gravestone, my heart felt like it was shattering.

No, that’s not the point right now.

I have to apologize.

Just as I opened my trembling lips to speak, a sudden chill touched my wrist and made me stop.

“Stay still.”

“Huh?”

A cold herb brushed against my swollen wrist. Judging by its refreshing scent, it must be medicinal. I bit my lip to endure the pain.

“Ow… it hurts…”

“This herb’s good for sprains. It’s to reduce the swelling, so hang in there.”

Then he spoke again.

“Earlier… I’m sorry.”

I didn’t know he could speak in such a gentle voice.

Even though that apology didn’t fully ease my feelings, something about it made me feel strange inside.

Wasn’t I the one who should be apologizing?

I had barged into his territory, dug around for secrets, and disrespected his space. My lips wouldn’t move easily.

What was that gravestone, really?

Why did I feel such sorrow when I touched it? Judging by Russell’s reaction, he doesn’t know that anything unusual happens when I touch the gravestone.

That cold but gentle sensation made my heart flutter, and I spoke without meaning to.

“Anyway… is the bear dead?”

Russell turned his gaze away from me. He calmly described the bear’s condition.

“It was a flower that made creatures pass out from its scent. I’ll release it somewhere far from the forest. After what happened, the bear will be too afraid to ever come back.”

Just a while ago, that bear almost killed me—but now I felt a bit sorry for it.

I closed my eyes and listened. I could hear the bear breathing steadily, and the wind gently brushing by.

Good.

So Russell didn’t kill it after all.

While I was feeling relieved, Asha stepped up and gently touched the bear. Was she checking its pulse to make sure it was okay?

Russell looked at her curiously.

“Is something wrong?”

Asha hesitated before answering.

“Well… normally, a bear would be hibernating this time of year. It’s strange that one came this deep into the forest. Judging by its coat and body, it doesn’t even seem to be starving.”

What?

Then someone might’ve sent the bear here on purpose?

Russell seemed to agree, nodding thoughtfully.

“Now that you mention it… If that’s the case, then maybe…”

I focused, trying to catch what Russell was about to say.

And suddenly—I saw a light in my vision that shouldn’t be there.

It’s okay. ■.

That voice—it was definitely mine. From my past life.

In the darkness, a single ray of light like the one I’d seen in the sewer crack appeared.

Why am I seeing this now?

He said that even if you’re powerless, if you take just one step forward, you won’t be scared anymore.

I don’t believe that.

A girl? No, he still looked like a child.

His form was blurry, but he looked small and thin, with a fragile frame.

But… I was always alone in my past life. No one pitied me or mourned when I died. So what is this memory?

“What is this…”

“Lady Fiana?”

A worried voice rang in my ears. Where am I right now? Am I still myself? What if these “past life memories” are just illusions caused by a head injury?

“Fiana, you…”

“I…”

My head spun, and my body tilted. Right before I hit the ground, someone caught me.

“My lady! Are you okay?”

It sounded like Asha, but I couldn’t hear her clearly. My head burned like it had been struck by lightning.

Now that I think of it… how did Russell even get here?

He didn’t ride a horse, and yet he covered such a long distance so quickly.

“My lady! Please, stay with us!”

I don’t know.

The more I try to learn about Russell, the more I feel like I’m the one getting hurt.

As my consciousness faded,

the image of the small, thin girl overlapped with Russell’s.

***

A dream.

My eyes, which should have shown only darkness, instead revealed a gray sky and a crumbling wooden building. That’s how I knew it was a dream.

I got up from the damp, sticky ground.

My brown hair fell over my shoulders.

Right. In my past life, I had ordinary brown hair and black eyes. After I went blind, I couldn’t see myself anymore, so I’d forgotten.

As I was lost in thought, my stomach growled.

Even in a dream, the hunger felt so real.

Maybe I should go outside and drink some rainwater…

Just as I moved to step out, I felt something underfoot at the threshold.

It was a child’s hand.

Pale, soft, and too innocent to be in a slum.

Without hesitation, I stepped over the door and approached the collapsed child.

“Hey! Wake up! Are you okay?”

I lifted the child. He was frighteningly thin and small. When I looked at his chest, I saw it gently rising and falling—he was still breathing.

He’s alive.

But even so, what difference did it make?

This place was the slums—a pit of filth. The very heart of the empire’s darkness.

There were more people dying of hunger than one could count, and just as many who would dig through the pockets of the dead just to fill their own stomachs.

So a child starving to death wasn’t anything unusual.

That’s how it should have been.

But when I came to my senses, my body had moved on its own.

I brought the girl inside and laid him down. Rain leaked through the ceiling, but it was still better than lying outside in the cold.

I took some ground oatmeal from the cupboard and mixed it with rainwater I had stored in a jar to make a simple porridge. I had no spices to season it with, but it was better than starving.

I held the girl in my arms and picked up a wooden spoon I had carved myself. I scooped up the oatmeal porridge and gently fed it into his throat. The girl let out a choking gasp and then started coughing dryly over and over again.

I softly patted his back.

“Swallow slowly. It’s okay.”

To others, this might look like tasteless slop—but for this child, it was precious nourishment.

After the girl finished the porridge, I took the bowl and started to head outside to wash it.

That’s when a faint, almost breaking voice stopped me.

“Why… are you being nice to me…?”

Of all things, that was the first thing he said after coming to his senses—not thank you or I almost died, but why are you being kind to me?

I let out a small laugh, caught off guard. I turned back and looked at the girl, slumped weakly against the wall with his knees pulled close.

I walked over to him and knelt down to meet his eyes. As I brought my face closer, he flinched slightly.

“There’s no reason. …I just didn’t want a dead body lying in front of my house.”

That’s what I said—but even I didn’t fully understand my true feelings. I didn’t have enough to eat myself. I was only heading to drink some rainwater from the jar—so why had I helped someone else?

Was it because, even as a rat from the slums, I still wanted to pretend I was human?

Just as that thought crossed my mind, the girl moved his lips.

“…■■■. I… I’m okay now.”

For some reason, those words made me feel at ease.

A small smile formed on my lips.

“Good. I’m glad. Then, shall we try moving a bit?”