Chapter 01
It was love at first sight.
I didn’t care that he was the heir of a rival family.
I was the daughter of the Heister family, and he was the heir of our enemy, the Valdormer family.
It all started with a small, meaningless act of kindness.
But for me, it shook my entire world.
Curiosity turned into interest, and interest into love.
He became my light… my breath.
And so, I loved him alone for 10 years.
When I was arranged to marry him in a deal between our families, I thought it was my chance.
It didn’t matter if I was a pawn in a family trade.
I was just happy to be by his side.
But he wasn’t the same.
“We’ll only share a bed on the scheduled days. I’d prefer no interference or interest beyond that,” he said.
To him, I was just the enemy’s daughter. A hostage, sold and unwanted.
Still, I didn’t mind.
I barely saw him once a month.
Even then, his face would be half-covered in shadow.
But when he was above me, breathing heavily, I could almost believe he wanted me.
I thought that maybe… maybe one day…
He would see my true feelings.
Smile at me just once.
Then, one day, I became pregnant with his child.
I felt like I had the whole world.
I thought—even he would be happy about this.
But he only said, “Another Heister bloodline, huh.”
So cold. Like it was a bother.
But this wasn’t a Heister child. It was your child. Our child.
And I felt guilty… like the Heister blood in me would make him hate even our baby.
But the moment the baby was born, he became my light.
Brighter than anything. My own sun.
His tiny hands, soft lips, his clear innocent eyes looking up at me—
He brought me a happiness I’d never felt before.
My child, Denian.
He was a gift from the heavens.
But then…
“Ah…”
I looked down at him, not breathing.
“Ahh…”
I held his cold, tiny hand.
“Ah, ahh…!”
My world shattered.
My beloved Denian. My light. My son…
He was gone.
I couldn’t accept it.
Couldn’t believe it.
My child… was murdered.
“Kallion! Denian was murdered! Your and my son was killed!”
I grabbed onto his leg, crying like a madwoman.
Begged him to find who did it.
But all he said, coldly, as he pushed me away:
“Don’t jump to conclusions, Yuliana.”
That one sentence froze my heart.
But I knew.
Denian was murdered.
Because of the special powers he inherited from my Heister bloodline.
I went crazy searching for the killer.
But Kallion treated me like a burden and locked me in a room.
“Let me out! Kallion, you bastard! Let me out!”
There was no love anymore.
Only hatred.
He became the most terrible person in my world.
“Stay quiet in that room. It’ll be better for you.”
“Kallion!”
The door sealed with Valdormer’s magic couldn’t be opened by my powers.
And so I stayed in that room like a lifeless doll.
Didn’t eat. Didn’t drink.
Days passed.
Then I saw the knife next to the food the maid brought.
I couldn’t stop myself.
I couldn’t live in a world without Denian.
So I closed my eyes and died… alone.
***
When I opened my eyes again,
I had gone back to when I was 20.
Before I married Kallion.
I ran away from my family to avoid the arranged marriage.
Far away—somewhere no one could find me.
And I started my life over again.
I grew crops, did embroidery, married an ordinary man.
Pretended everything was okay.
But in the end, someone who noticed my powers killed me.
And so I kept returning… again and again.
I lived as a wild woman with many men.
Met someone who loved me more than life itself.
But I could never meet Denian again.
A life without him…
It was worse than death.
Like wandering in darkness with no light.
Every time I returned, I died alone.
***
On the 11th return…
I stood in front of you again.
“Groom, Kallion de Valdormer. Will you love the woman before you, with your family’s vow?”
He answered coldly,
“Yes.”
“Bride, Yuliana de Heister. Will you love the man before you, with your family’s vow?”
I looked up from the ground,
no longer afraid, no longer hesitant.
If I could just meet that child again—
If I could find the one who killed us—
“Yes.”
But Kallion—remember this.
There is no more love between us.
I stared coldly back at his blank eyes.
And so, I married him a second time.
***
After the wedding.
The wedding night.
I sat by the window. Kallion didn’t come.
I wasn’t surprised.
Even in the past, he didn’t come that night.
People would talk about how I spent the wedding night alone.
But I didn’t care.
Denian wasn’t supposed to be conceived until later anyway.
So I wasn’t nervous or sad.
Just… bored. Sick of this moment.
Then—there was a knock.
In the past, I might’ve run barefoot, hoping it was him.
Now, I just stared calmly at the door.
“Come in.”
Click.
As expected, that woman entered.
“Hello, madam.”
A neat, polite smile on her face.
She was Kallion’s secretary.
And the daughter of a vassal family loyal to Valdormer: the Sorrentos.
She looked at me with mild pity and said kindly:
“Lord Kallion is busy with work and asked me to tell you to go to sleep without him.”
Why he had to send his secretary for that message, I didn’t know.
In the past, it had made me furious. It was humiliating.
Layla de Sorrento—Kallion’s secretary.
There was a time I used to be jealous of her.
The woman who spent so much time with Kallion,
the woman closest to him.
“Kallion! Tell me the truth! What’s going on between you and your secretary?”
Whenever I asked, he always gave me that annoyed, fed-up look.
“Stop talking nonsense, Yuliana. Every time you act like this, I feel like I can’t breathe.”
Looking back now, the old me was pathetic and foolish.
Why was I so anxious? So desperate?
What was so special about that so-called love?
No—was it even love at all?
I pushed those memories out of my mind and replied calmly,
“Alright.”
Layla’s eyes widened in surprise at my calm answer.
Did she think I’d storm off to Kallion’s office, fuming with rage?
“Do you have anything else to say?”
“…No, ma’am.”
I stared at Layla blankly, then closed the door without hesitation.
Honestly, I was relieved I didn’t have to see his face on the wedding night.
The man who ignored Denian’s death…
The man who locked me away like I was a nuisance while I was begging, crying, losing my mind from grief.
If I had to face that man and share a bed with him that night,
I might’ve stabbed him in the back.
But I couldn’t let that happen.
If I did, then everything I’d endured—this painful return to this hellish mansion—would mean nothing.
Kallion.
I hated him.
I resented him more than anything.
But after living and dying so many times,
I learned that even hatred is pointless.
Now, I have only one wish.
To meet my child, Denian.
To live quietly with him in some faraway place.
For that, I could endure any shame or insult.
Outside the window, the moon glowed softly in the dark sky.
It was the same moon I once saw while crying alone on my wedding night.
