Chapter 1
Noah was lying silently next to the bathtub, in front of a big window that showed the black sea of Malibu.
Her pale blonde hair was messy, and she looked very thin. She had her left arm over her eyes and was breathing quietly.
She was tall and had a sharp, cold look. She looked hard to approach.
And it wasn’t even the bathtub—she was lying on the cold bathroom floor.
Then, the door opened and a woman with long black hair walked in.
She looked at Noah and clicked her tongue.
“Noah, seriously?”
She sounded like she was scolding her, but her voice was full of care. She sat down next to Noah.
“I saw you storm out of the studio. I thought you went somewhere dramatic. But really? You’re just lying on your bathroom floor at home?”
Noah didn’t move her arm or look at her. She just said, “Go away.”
“Why are you so angry again? Is it because of the session players? I told you this would happen. Why did you fight with the band members again?”
“I said go away.”
“You’re like this even to the last member who’s still with you.”
The woman laughed and gently pulled Noah’s arm down.
Noah’s tired face appeared, her smoky makeup smudged. She didn’t open her eyes—she didn’t want to show the tears.
Her name was Anya.
She was the drummer of Noah’s band, Arkless, and the only one who stayed by her side.
“You didn’t like the new bassist, right? I’ll find another one. They’re all scared of you anyway—”
“It’s not about them.”
Noah interrupted her.
It really didn’t matter who played. Even a random cat could’ve stood in for them—it would feel the same to her.
“Then why are you like this?”
“…I can’t sing.”
“You?!”
Anya looked completely shocked.
Noah, the lead singer of Arkless, couldn’t sing?
“Is this a joke? Maybe your throat is just tired today. Rest a bit—”
“I want to be alone, Anya.”
Noah sat up, wiping her face with both hands. Her dark makeup smeared even more.
She didn’t even have the energy to push Anya out, so she just crawled into the bathtub instead.
Whenever she wanted to be completely alone, Noah did this.
Anya understood and left quietly, though she looked worried.
When the door closed, Noah hugged her knees and lay on her side.
Her ear touched the cold floor.
Suddenly, memories of the stage came flooding back.
Back when all four band members were together, full of joy and dreams.
“We were never
the chosen ones,
not even once.
We’ve always been the first ones thrown away.
But it’s okay.
I’ll sink into the water with you,
just like this.
Just like this.”
Those were the days when they sang on stage with no worries.
Noah remembered a time with Mia, the guitarist.
“Did you record the ocean sound?”
“Yeah. Where do you want to use it?”
“Here—‘I’ll sink into the water with you.’”
“Why this wave sound? Can’t we use something else?”
Mia always frowned when she didn’t understand something.
“I just want to capture this moment of us four by the ocean.”
“Ew. You’re being creepy again, Noah.”
“Shut up, Rosie. Your pink hair is creepier.”
Rosie, the bassist, pretended to gag. She hated emotional moments.
But Noah would joke back, saying Rosie had the most romantic name.
Then Anya, the drummer, would always jump in and calm things down.
“If Noah wasn’t such a kind person, half of our songs wouldn’t exist.”
“Rock stars aren’t supposed to be kind. Noah’s a failed rocker.”
“He’s just crazy about rock.”
They laughed and fought, but those were happy times.
Noah kept thinking about them—times that would never come back.
That one part of the song:
“I’ll sink into the water with you.”
It was the only line where all four members sang together.
Even Rosie, who hated singing, agreed to do backup vocals there.
To the world, the song “Sink Into the Water” was a Grammy-winning hit.
But to the band, it was much more.
It showed their bond and love for each other.
Now, it was all in the past.
Noah laughed bitterly.
It had been 10 years since that song came out.
Now, Arkless was just an old band no one cared about.
“I want to get married.”
“What?!”
“I want to live as a wife and mom. I’m tired of this life.”
“But your talent! People would die to have what you have!”
“Not everyone wants to live for music like you, Noah.”
Mia left the band to live a normal life.
“Ugh, paparazzi again. They never stop.”
“You should be used to it after more than 10 years.”
“This kind of life is exhausting. I love music and you guys, but I hate the rumors, the gossip, the reporters always outside my house.”
“No, Rosie. Mia already left. If you go too—”
“Sorry, Noah. I can’t do it anymore.”
Rosie left and disappeared. No one could reach her.
Only sometimes they heard from her mom that she was traveling the world.
Now, only Noah and Anya were left.
Noah was mentally broken.
Anya, as always, stayed strong and protected the band—or rather, protected Noah.
Noah wanted to give up many times, but she held on because she didn’t want to disappoint Anya.
She had been holding on for 10 years.
Now, she had nothing left. She couldn’t even sing.
Noah had written all the band’s songs, but now she hadn’t written a single one in years.
She had still managed to sing somehow—until now.
But now, even her voice was gone.
“I don’t want to wake up anymore.”
I just want to dream of when the four of us were on stage.
With that thought, Noah closed her eyes.
* * *
“Hey.”
“…?”
Hey?
Is this a fan? But I’m almost 40. Why are they calling me a fairy or something?
“Hey, wake up.”
Wait… Was that Korean?
In the middle of Malibu? And it’s not Anya’s voice?
Noah opened her eyes.
The person poking her arm was a young Asian girl.
“A kid?”
Noah was too shocked to speak. The girl looked about 17, super young.
She had fancy makeup, not like normal American teens. And she was really pretty.
“Come on! We have to go on stage! How long are you going to lie there?”
“S-stage?”
“Yeah, the stage. Don’t tell me you forgot the lyrics again and are panicking?”
“…Lyrics?”
What lyrics? Wait—what?!
“You and me… on the same stage?”
I’m… standing on stage with a kid who looks like she was just born?
Me? The greatest rock star of the 21st centurY.
