Chapter 35
I looked at Diane as if I couldn’t understand her words.
“Diane?”
She paused for a moment, as if holding something back, then smiled casually.
“Sometimes, crazy people like that do exist. And right now, my father is focused on an important deal. Even if this causes some concern, now is not the right time.”
Then, with a slightly troubled expression, she added,
“And… something about his confidence bothers me. As if he’s holding onto something. If something happens…”
She muttered,
“Yes… now is not the time. At least, not until my father’s deal is finished.”
At first, I was furious at her for being too careless when she said she would just burn it all down. But I couldn’t say anything after hearing her words.
She didn’t want to bring shame to her family. And I knew all too well what that felt like.
She suddenly clapped her hands and put on a bright expression.
“The mood got too serious, didn’t it? All because of that man. This was supposed to be fun. Let’s talk about something more cheerful. Did you hear that Lady Baron is having an affair?”
Seeing her forcefully change the subject made me feel terrible.
I had thought I was the only one suffering back then. But she had been walking straight into her hell while still smiling.
She never told anyone the truth. She carried everything alone, never saying a word, enduring it all.
Maybe it was because she thought I wouldn’t be able to help. Or maybe she believed it was simply her duty.
Before I could ask why no one had helped me, I realized I hadn’t even known what kind of hell my friend was living in.
Why had she never told me?
Was it something I couldn’t have helped with?
I had never imagined Diane was the kind of person who bottled everything up.
How little did I know about the people around me?
I looked at Diane.
She seemed to be worried that she had ruined my mood with her words.
Even that thoughtfulness made my heart ache.
I knew how much a terrible marriage could destroy a person.
I couldn’t bear to see Diane end up like that.
I quietly said to her,
“Diana.”
She sighed as if she had no choice.
“I ruined the mood today. That was my mistake. Should we end it here?”
I replied,
“No, that’s not it. People don’t have to be cheerful all the time. If we can share the good moments, we should be able to share the bad ones too.”
Diane looked at me with a slightly unreadable expression.
Seeing that, I spoke sincerely,
“More than anything… what that man said worries me. I’ll do my best to look into it and help, so if you have any guesses, please tell me.”
Finally, Diane smiled faintly.
“You’re always so serious. I do like that about you, though.”
Then, as if she had never looked troubled at all, she smiled brightly.
“Alright. I will.”
Even after I returned home, I couldn’t get Diane out of my head.
“How could she smile in that situation? How could she say nothing at all? I thought she was such a lighthearted person…”
The fact that our wedding preparations overlapped also bothered me.
“How painful must it have been for her while I was excited about my marriage?”
Even if I hadn’t known, she must have cried so many times while preparing for her wedding.
And yet, I had no idea.
I had talked about my happiness and even congratulated her.
Sigh—
A deep breath escaped me. I leaned back in my chair and looked out the window. The sky had already darkened.
“Even now, I still feel this heavy.”
My thoughts were tangled. I kept going back and forth between telling myself it was her problem and wondering just how painful it must have been for her.
I wished I had some kind of reason—some justification to convince myself.
My actions didn’t just affect me. If I got involved in trouble and ruined my reputation, the Armen family’s name would suffer as well.
Frustrated, I bit my lip.
“Even if I died and came back to life, this stubborn personality wouldn’t change.”
For a moment, I thought about ignoring it like before.
But then I pictured Diane’s future after marriage, and my chest tightened.
If only she were the type to cry and ask for help, I might not be so worried.
But she wasn’t.
She would just smile calmly—until she died.
Just like I had.
I wasn’t strong like Diane. In the end, I broke down and acted disgracefully.
Pressing my hand against my chest, I thought,
If someone had reached out to me back then. If someone had told me to stop, to leave, or even just that my dreams would never come true—
If someone had told me that my happiness was impossible—
How different would my life have been?
At least, it wouldn’t have been this painful.
I was lucky. A miracle had saved me.
But would Diane have the same luck?
“Why was I the only one given a miracle?”
Why had I learned about all of this now?
Why had I never thought about giving to others the salvation I had once wished for?
Slowly, my swirling thoughts solidified into a decision.
Just as I had hoped for someone to save me back then, I wanted to save Diane now.
“This isn’t foolish or arrogant.”
Because if someone had reached out to me, I would have been saved.
At that moment, my eyes landed on my desk drawer.
I don’t know why, but I felt drawn to it.
I reached inside and pulled out a letter.
I ran my fingers over the cold, smooth handwriting—words that promised me an eternal silver rose.
Then, I took out an invitation.
Avoiding this just because it started the same way as before—wasn’t that proof I was still trapped by my past?
Gently, I traced my fingers over the glossy invitation and made up my mind.
“I’ll help Diane. And I’ll meet this person to express my gratitude and talk to them one more time.”
If I turned away now, I would regret it someday.
I didn’t want to have any more regrets.
Miracles don’t happen twice.
Deciding to help Diane made me feel lighter.
That strengthened my resolve.
Something that felt this right couldn’t be a mistake.
“Even if I end up suffering a little, I won’t regret it. Because this is something worth doing.”
The first step to helping Diane was gathering information.
Using my family’s influence would be the fastest way.
But if I told my parents everything and asked for help, it would only cause unnecessary trouble.
So, I decided to do things the old-fashioned way—on my own.
“Lysdel.”
“Miss? It’s me. I’m coming in.”
When I rang the bell, Lysdel entered gracefully.
She looked more confident now.
She used to be so nervous and stiff, but now she had an air of ease.
I couldn’t help but tease her.
“You look great these days. No more crying? That’s a shame.”
Lysdel, usually calm and composed, turned bright red.
“A-ah, Miss, that’s—”
I laughed and continued,
“Just now, you looked so serious and professional, I almost thought you were the head maid.”
Lysdel looked horrified.
“I looked like Miss Yuli?”
I knew she secretly thought the head maid was scary, so I laughed harder.
After teasing her a bit more, I finally got to the point.
“Do you know any maids working at the Rust household? Or in Count Donau Decaine’s house?”
Lysdel thought for a moment.
“Not me, but Hannah might. And if not, we can quietly ask around. Someone will know.”
Then, with certainty, she added,
“If we dig deep enough, we’ll find something. Especially about the Donau household. I’ve heard the lady of the house is absent, so the servants are often replaced and discipline is weak. If you need something, it won’t be hard to find out. I’ll investigate it properly.”
Seeing her so reliable, I smiled in satisfaction.
