Chapter 33
I hesitated for a moment. What kind of reply would convince them that I was truly fine? I struggled with my literary ability.
But the situation was terrible. No matter how eloquently a great dead author returned to proclaim their well-being, no one would believe it.
Yet, I was truly fine.
The next day, I felt so much better that I wondered why I had been so shaken and acted so irrationally the day before.
Maybe it was because of the kind person who silently stayed by my side until the end.
Or perhaps it was because Raina had finally disappointed me enough to rid me of my last lingering attachment.
“I was hoping without even realizing it… again. How foolish and stubborn of me.”
If it had been someone else, I would have laughed at them, but since it was me, I could only sigh.
At least now, I was sure. Yesterday had made me realize—I had no reason to hold on any longer.
I would leave the rest to the butler and head maid and step away from it all.
Demeter House would take care of the rest without me dirtying my hands. They affected me too much.
Revenge only led to more pain. Even though I knew I would never receive an apology, I kept clinging to it. This was self-destruction.
I scolded myself.
“How foolish. I knew I was but to this extent? This is beyond what I can excuse, even for myself.”
I had embarrassed myself at a party held by the young ladies of my faction. I had inconvenienced a stranger and poured out my emotions to them.
I had let people see me with my hair in disarray, crying like a fool.
Mother must have been so shocked. The other young ladies in my circle must have been just as stunned.
If I couldn’t maintain my distance, I should have left it to others from the start.
“What a disgrace.”
After sleeping and letting my mind clear, I came to one conclusion.
This was not just for my sake—it was a punishment as well.
“If I lose myself over this, I shouldn’t be involved at all.”
Besides, revenge was already set in motion without my interference.
Bern’s reputation was damaged. His competence as an heir was being questioned. And his obsessive protectiveness over Raina…
Great noble families deal with problems in a ruthlessly cold and brutal manner.
If Bern harmed Raina, despite his parents’ wishes, he would not be forgiven. Those dark navy eyes had been calm but firm—if Raina was harmed, he wouldn’t stand by, even if the perpetrators were his parents.
It was like planting a bomb inside the Demeter family.
“Of course, it won’t go as far as rumors of the heir murdering the head of the family… probably.”
After much thought, I finally summoned the butler and headmaid.
I turned to Yuli, the head maid. Though she had a gentle and caring appearance, she was strict and efficient in her work.
“Yuli, from now on, I want you to take over the matter of my ward. I wanted to handle it myself, but my emotions were getting in the way… Please take care of it.”
As I spoke, I felt I had made it too personal, so I trailed off.
Then I turned to the butler and added,
“Butler, the reason I called you as well… I don’t want to hear about her anymore. I will support her as best as I can so my name isn’t shamed, but I don’t want to know anything about her life. Only inform me when her wedding date is set.”
Once that wedding was over, I would truly forget. Completely forget.
Even if I died, I wouldn’t let myself remember. I refused to be dragged down any further.
After saying it, I felt ashamed to face them. That’s why I wanted to say it quickly and leave.
But when I saw them respond with their usual calm expressions and nods, I couldn’t hold back anymore.
I hesitated, then spoke weakly.
“I’m sorry… Arsen, Yuli. I took on something thinking I could handle it, and now I’m dumping it on you. I guess I’m still not ready to be the lady of a household.”
The butler looked me in the eye and spoke gently.
“Please don’t worry, my lady. If this is the request, I would gladly fulfill it a thousand times. I will ensure that no unnecessary news reaches your ears.”
The head maid added in a confident tone,
“I will take care of everything so that your name is never tarnished. I will handle this properly, without personal feelings getting in the way.”
Their reassurances eased my heart.
Lately, I have been relying on those around me too much.
Looking at them, I sincerely said,
“…Thank you.”
Now, I could live my life. I could do what I wanted.
I was finally free.
That thought left me feeling blank.
For the first time, I had to ask myself a question I should have faced long ago.
“Then… what do I live for now?”
It was strange.
Before my life was shattered by that nightmare, I had never even questioned how to live.
“Why do I have to think about how to live now?”
I wasn’t empty—I just had no clear direction. The end of one thing didn’t mean the beginning of another. I had to piece myself together again.
But I wasn’t alone.
“Father said he would teach me business. Mother suggested we go on a retreat together….”
The people I once feared as shallow acquaintances had welcomed me back as a friend.
“Hyde, who always argued with me, but also listened, still remembered me.”
A smile naturally spread across my face.
It was both terrifying and exciting.
Rediscovering myself would be difficult, but not impossible.
But my resolution was interrupted by something unexpected.
“Ah! Look at these flowers! These are peonies imported from the East… They say it’s the king of flowers. It’s so beautiful and romantic.”
Lysdel was admiring the flowers, wondering where to place them. I glanced around in disbelief.
Every available space was covered with flowers.
Gifts had been arriving at my house since that night.
I had never had suitors send gifts like this before, so I had no idea what to do.
Mother simply told me to do as I pleased. Father thought it might be a nice distraction.
But as the one receiving the gifts, it was overwhelming. There were too many to decline individually, but I wasn’t particularly eager to meet any of the senders either.
“There’s no space left to put another flower.”
I murmured in confusion.
“I have no idea what’s going on.”
Hannah, who was organizing the gifts, smirked proudly.
“Lysdel said that anyone who saw you that night would have no choice but to fall for you. They all fell in love at first sight! They do have good taste.”
Then she suddenly pouted and cursed Raina.
“I wish I had seen your radiant beauty that night, but because of that woman…! So frustrating.”
I smiled slightly.
I couldn’t exactly tell her that I had run out of the party with messy hair and tear-streaked cheeks.
Just thinking about it made me cringe, so I shook my head to clear my mind.
But it wasn’t a terrible memory, thanks to him.
A man with gentle green eyes and a pale face—calm, yet unreadable.
The thought of him made me smile.
At that moment, Lysdel gasped.
“My lady! Look at this! A silver rose! How did they make this?”
“A silver rose?”
A thought struck me, and I stood up.
Lysdel and Hannah were already examining it in awe.
“Oh my, it looks just like the silver rose you wore that night! But this one is made of real silver! Someone must have been very impressed by your hairpiece. Ah, who could it be? This is so exciting!”
Hannah handed me the gift. Unlike the bulky presents, this one was small and elegant.
Inside a black wooden box, a deep red velvet lining cradled a delicately crafted silver rose.
“My lady, there was a letter with it.”
Hannah handed me an envelope with no family crest or sender’s name.
Breaking the simple wax seal, I found a card inside.
My heart pounded.
I had a feeling I knew who it was from.
Did he know I had wanted to see him again?
But why was he hiding his identity?
And where did he get such a finely made silver rose?
My mind raced with questions as I read the elegant handwriting:
“I look forward to seeing you again. Your silver rose withered as if it were a real flower. So, I send you an eternal one, made of pure silver.”
There was no sender, no address—just that simple message.
For some reason, my heart beat faster.
“Lady, there’s another card in the envelope.”
It was an invitation to Countess Lydia’s poetry gathering.
I blinked at it, recalling memories.
“This place….”
