Chapter 28
28. A Confession from His Majesty Aleksanteri
I had noticed that the eggplants in the kitchen garden had begun to bear fruit. Autumn eggplants are delicious.
The potatoes were also growing well, and the cucumbers, once I had given them stakes, twined themselves neatly and thrived.
Satisfied after finishing my morning work in the courtyard, I washed my hands, changed clothes, and sat down at the breakfast table.
Tending to the kitchen garden was something I always did early in the morning. It was pleasant in spring and autumn, but in summer the heat became oppressive, so I had developed the habit of working at dawn.
When the potatoes are still small, I thought, I could brush off the dirt, fry them whole with their skins, and they would taste wonderful.
Humming to myself in anticipation of the harvest, I entered the dining room—just as His Majesty Aleksanteri, already prepared for the day, arrived.
“Reisie, after you.”
“Thank you very much.”
He opened the dining room door for me. After expressing my gratitude, I entered, and when His Majesty had taken his seat, I sat down as well.
The breakfast served to us consisted of thick slices of ham and bacon, an omelet, bread, soup, and salad, with fruit for dessert.
“What are your plans today, Reisie?”
“From the morning, Madam Laval is coming. I will be receiving consort training. I have lessons scheduled in the afternoon as well.”
“I will return in time for tea. Let us have tea together.”
“What about your official duties, Your Majesty?”
“Lately, my work has been progressing smoothly, and I’ve found myself with more free time. I can complete what remains in my study after tea.”
“Then, I shall look forward to it.”
It seemed I would be able to share tea with His Majesty today.
That thought filled me with happiness—yet, suddenly, a question welled up in my heart.
His Majesty Aleksanteri had never once said the words “I love you” or even “I like you” to me. Perhaps, as a noble, such things were meant to be understood without being voiced. But I was the kind of person who became anxious if those words were not spoken aloud.
He had admitted that Cecil was his first love, that he cherished her memory, and so I knew he must have truly cared for her.
But what about me?
I knew Cecil’s memories only because I had seen them in dreams. I was not Cecil herself.
“Your Majesty Aleksanteri… what do you think of me?”
The question slipped from my lips before I realized it, and His Majesty replied:
“You are precious to me.”
“Not like that…”
“You are the most important person in this world to me, Reisie. Without you, I could no longer live.”
“That makes me happy, but… I wish to know Your Majesty’s feelings.”
“Does this not convey them?”
So it was true—an emperor does not utter words such as “love” or “like.”
Because I did not reply, His Majesty continued:
“Your presence is necessary to me. I wish to be with you all my life. Does that not reach your heart?”
“It does reach me. It makes me very happy.”
Yet, I still longed to hear those simple words: “I like you” or “I love you.”
I must have sulked a little, because His Majesty looked puzzled—but breakfast ended, and he had to leave for his duties.
“Reisie, please cheer up. I will return at tea time. When I do, greet me with a ‘welcome back.’”
“Yes. Please take care, Your Majesty.”
I tried to dismiss my childish thoughts and send him off gracefully, yet I could not shake the haze lingering in my heart.
This morning, Madam Laval was to come for my consort training.
As I listened to her lesson, a sigh escaped me. She seemed to notice.
“Has something happened today, Princess Reisie? Could this be… what they call the ‘marriage blues’?”
Marriage blues—so they say—refers to the anxiety that grips some people before marriage. That wasn’t exactly my case, but I hesitated over whether to confide in her.
With no one else to ask, however, I gathered the courage to speak.
“Do highborn gentlemen never say things like ‘I like you’ or ‘I love you’ to their betrothed?”
“Is that from your own experience, Princess Reisie?”
“N-no, it merely crossed my mind…”
I tried to cover it up, but I had the feeling Madam Laval saw right through me.
“Well, it is true that such words are not spoken lightly. However, to convey one’s feelings, words of love are essential—even for those of the highest rank.”
“Should I perhaps be the one to say them first?”
“If you were to say it, I believe His Majesty would be overjoyed. But… do you mean to tell me His Majesty has yet to say ‘I like you’ or ‘I love you,’ despite his obvious devotion to you?”
“Ah! N-no, that’s not… I—I misspoke.”
“There’s no need to deny it now. His Majesty has matured greatly in spirit, yet in some ways he remains childlike.”
With her sigh, I realized I had let everything slip. I had revealed that His Majesty had never told me he loved me.
Madam Laval then scribbled something on a sheet of stationery, sealed it in an envelope, and entrusted it to a maid.
“Deliver this to His Majesty. Tell him it concerns a matter of great importance regarding Princess Reisie. He will surely respond at once.”
I could only watch the maid leave with regret, berating myself for having said too much.
Afterward, I continued my consort training with Madam Laval, then shared lunch with her. Since His Majesty was expected back for tea, she departed before that time.
I waited in the tea room. Soon, His Majesty Aleksanteri entered, breathless.
“Welcome back, Your Majesty.”
“I’m home, Reisie.”
Before I knew it, I was enveloped in his broad embrace. It must have been a “welcome home” hug, but since he had never done such a thing before, my heart pounded wildly.
When he finally let go and sat on the sofa, I joined him.
At meals, as with seating, His Majesty always preferred to sit beside me rather than across. I had to tilt my head upward to see him, while he gazed down with his usual gentle smile. But today, his expression was serious.
“Your Majesty Aleksanteri?”
As the maids poured the tea and withdrew to the corner, His Majesty took my hand. His pomegranate-red eyes fixed on me, earnest and unwavering.
“Reisie… I love you.”
“Y-yes!”
The suddenness of it nearly made my heart leap out of my chest. His Majesty clasped my hands between both of his and lifted them to his forehead, as if in prayer, continuing:
“I love you, Reisie. I will love only you, forever.”
“Your Majesty… I love you as well.”
“Reisie, all this time I believed I had already told you so—that I had said ‘I love you’ to you. But it seems I never did. Forgive me for making you uneasy.”
“You thought you had said it?”
“I assumed my feelings were already clear to you. But when Madam Laval’s letter reached me, I could not stay still. I wanted to abandon my duties and rush to you that very instant. I could not, of course—but I finished everything at record speed so I could return.”
So His Majesty did love me.
And I… loved him in return.
At first, his sudden proposal had terrified me. I had thought my freedom would vanish. I had feared he wanted a marriage in name only, or that I would be no more than a temporary consort or concubine.
Yet His Majesty had always treated me with sincerity and devotion.
Most of all, when I learned that the adorable little boy I had seen in my dreams—dear Garnet—was in fact His Majesty himself, and when he buried his face against my shoulder and wept, those tears spoke volumes of his heart.
“Your Majesty Aleksanteri… I love you.”
Though I was only a consort, perhaps even a concubine, being loved brought me joy. And I loved him in return.
When I confessed, His Majesty kissed my fingertips and smiled with a beauty like a flower in full bloom.
