Chapter 04
4. The Visit of the Knight Commander
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That dream again.
In the dream, I become me.
Black hair, black eyes.
A face much like mine appears in the mirror.
The me reflected in the mirror was sewing my own clothes. The clothes I had worn until then had grown too tight, so I was letting them out, adding a little more fabric to match my body’s size.
At my feet, Garnet-kun sat quietly, reading a picture book.
All the clothes Garnet-kun wore were ones I had made for him. I sewed them with room to grow, taking in the width and folding back the sleeves and hems.
Shoes were the only thing I couldn’t make. I had to buy them from the town’s cobbler. But when I suggested we go to town to fit them properly, Garnet-kun grew terribly frightened. So instead, I measured his feet and bought some close to his size.
Since he almost never went outside, that seemed sufficient.
“Big Sister, Big Sister, what’s your name?”
“I’m Cecil. Garnet-kun, can’t you remember your own name?”
When I first asked, maybe he had just been too confused to say it. That’s why I kept asking from time to time. But every time, Garnet-kun would shake his head with a tearful look.
His pomegranate-colored crimson eyes would well up with tears, and I couldn’t bring myself to push him further.
That day too, he shook his head, but after thinking for a moment, he beckoned me closer.
“Lend me your ear?”
“What is it?”
“You see, I do know my real name. But I was told I mustn’t tell anyone.”
“You mustn’t?”
“Mm. I’m sorry.”
He lowered his small head, apologizing, and I stroked his silky silver hair.
“It’s all right. Then here, you can just be Garnet-kun.”
“I like the name Big Sister gave me.”
“I like your name too, Garnet-kun.”
“I like you too, Big Sister.”
He gazed at me with those pure crimson eyes, and I couldn’t help but giggle. I had just been confessed to by a six-year-old boy.
Sixteen as I was, I had never once been involved in romance. That was the very first confession I had ever received from the opposite sex.
“I love you too, Garnet-kun.”
As family, as a little brother-like presence, I loved Garnet-kun dearly.
Even if someone came to take him away one day, I knew I would never forget him.
Even if the little Garnet-kun forgot about me.
When I awoke, I reflected on what had actually happened to me.
That was at the graduation party.
There, my engagement was annulled. I was so glad about it, even relieved. But then, for some reason, His Majesty the Emperor himself proposed to me.
Why in the world would His Majesty propose to me?
If only that part had been a dream.
But my wish was in vain. The day after I returned to our modest manor in our domain, a formal envoy arrived from the Emperor.
The envoy was none other than the famous Knight Commander of the Imperial Knights, Captain Gregor Kremen.
He looked to be in his late forties, a little older than my parents. He handed over a sealed letter, stamped with the imperial signet, to my father and mother.
“I am Gregor Kremen, Commander of the Valen Empire’s Knights. I have been entrusted with a letter from His Majesty the Emperor, addressed to Viscount and Viscountess Dian. Please accept it.”
“Y-yes…”
Invited into the drawing room, Commander Kremen stood tall. My parents were completely cowed by his presence. His Majesty was tall and awe-inspiring, but Commander Kremen too was tall, broad-shouldered, and powerfully built. Standing straight-backed and rigid, he made it impossible for any of us—my parents, Sofia, or me—to take a seat.
“Commander Kremen, please, sit down.”
“No, I must remain standing until I witness the letter opened and receive your reply.”
“I-I see…”
Since Commander Kremen refused to sit, my father had to open the letter while standing.
Its contents were just as I had feared.
To Viscount Dian,
I, Emperor Aleksanteri Luxerion, hereby propose marriage to your daughter, Lacy Dian. A one-year engagement period shall be observed, after which we shall wed. During that year, Lacy shall reside in the Imperial Palace and receive her education there. You are instructed to send her to the capital at once.
—Aleksanteri Luxerion
There was no room for refusal in that wording!
What in the world were we supposed to reply!?
Looking at my father’s face, I could see the color drain from him.
The Emperor, who had always declared he would not marry, now intended to take me—whether as consort or concubine was unclear. There were no other direct heirs. The previous Emperor’s younger brother lived, but he had renounced succession. His children too would be made to renounce their claims as soon as His Majesty produced an heir.
The Emperor had to have children.
I understood it was his duty as Emperor. But I had no desire to be anyone’s consort or concubine.
At long last, I had escaped the nuisance of a political marriage. I wanted to be free.
But such freedom was not to be mine.
“I shall prepare Lacy for the palace. Surely His Majesty, in his mercy, will grant us that much time.”
“I will convey that to His Majesty.”
“Lacy is the Dian family’s eldest daughter and heir. What about that matter?”
“The Dian family has two daughters. That is your answer.”
My father tried to use my status as eldest daughter and heir as a pretext to refuse, but Commander Kremen brushed it aside without effort.
At last, he sat down, allowing us to do the same. With trembling hands, Father wrote his reply to the Emperor. Commander Kremen took it and departed for the capital.
Once he was gone, chaos erupted in our house.
“Why you, Sister!? What is His Majesty thinking!? If you go to the palace, won’t you be bullied?”
“I also think I am entirely unsuited for such a place. But perhaps His Majesty must marry, and I was conveniently available after my broken engagement.”
“And that rumor about him falling for you at the debutante?”
“Surely just an excuse. I believe I could have been anyone.”
Anything else would make no sense.
At the debutante, each girl had no more than thirty seconds to greet him. To say he felt destiny then—I simply could not believe it.
No, it was just that there happened to be a discarded fiancée right before him, and he, pressured by the court to marry, found me convenient enough to take as consort or concubine.
Dragged into this, I could only feel troubled.
But there was no avoiding it.
I had to prepare to go to the palace.
“I am sorry, Lacy. We cannot refuse His Majesty’s command.”
“Lacy, I dread to imagine what kind of treatment you will suffer in the palace.”
“It’s all right, Father, Mother. I imagine it will be nothing more than a marriage in name only. His Majesty probably just wants someone convenient to silence those who demand he wed.”
I could understand His Majesty’s feelings.
I too had dreaded a political marriage. I hadn’t truly wanted to wed my former fiancé, Lord Renan. When the engagement was broken, I had felt free. Marked as a cast-off, no one would want to marry me now—so I thought I could enjoy life alone.
In that sense, perhaps if I spoke openly with His Majesty, we might become co-conspirators of a sort.
“Sister, you are far too optimistic. At the graduation party, His Majesty grabbed your arm, forced you to stand beside him, and sat you at his side without even letting you bow. Every noble there saw it. His Majesty’s behavior toward you was unnatural.”
“Surely that was just to make the marriage seem credible.”
“You are too unaware of your own worth. Anyone would fall for someone as wise and kind as you.”
That’s just sisterly bias, isn’t it, Sofia?
I was glad she cherished me so, but I couldn’t help but think her view was mistaken.
To me, His Majesty was simply using me.
“Could it be that you and His Majesty met somewhere besides the debutante?”
“No, never.”
Sofia suspected me, but I could say that much with certainty. I had never approached such a handsome man, nor exchanged any words with him.
Truly, all I had ever done was that one brief greeting at the debutante.
There was nothing about me that could have made His Majesty like me.
Though I insisted this, Sofia only looked at me with doubt.
Because she cared, she couldn’t help but question my relationship with the Emperor.
From that day on, I grew busy.
I had no gowns fit for the palace. The only dress I could wear was one I had sewn myself. All I wanted to take with me besides that was my embroidery kit, sewing set, and lacework tools.
So little to bring—could I truly live in the palace with only this?
Would I be scolded if I wore the same dress every day? More than that, it was hardly sanitary.
I thought perhaps I should sew at least one more dress, but there was no time.
The day the palace came to fetch me was fast approaching.
