Chapter 3
On the day I bought sweets for Euna,
her forehead burned with fever all through the night.
Seeing Euna flushed with heat, Mother grew distressed—and scolded me.
“Euna said she was fine, and you just left anyway? How could you be so careless? You should have thought about Euna.”
“But today was the day of my exam. I studied hard for it—”
“Your sister is this sick! Exams can be taken any time, can’t they?”
That night, my parents turned their backs on me as I stood clutching Mother’s skirt, and spent the entire night caring for Euna.
After that, I stopped talking about my own circumstances.
After all, in my parents’ eyes, the first priority was always sick Euna—not me.
It was the same even on days that should have been special to me.
“Oh dear, yesterday was Seha’s birthday. We’ve been so busy lately that we couldn’t even celebrate…”
“Go with Hong-a today and have some clothes made—anything you like. I need to stop by the apothecary, so…”
At first, I understood.
My parents felt guilty toward me.
But as it grew harder to even see their faces—on my birthdays, on holidays—my expectations quietly faded.
Ever since we came to Eunri Escort Agency, I had been lonely.
I had no memories of spending time alone with Mother.
Father seemed uninterested in my academic achievements or my martial progress.
In their hearts, there was only sick Euna.
It felt as though I didn’t exist at all.
In the end, even at my long-awaited engagement ceremony, Father failed to arrive on time.
Without realizing it, I was learning how to give up.
Time passed, and a few days before my eighteenth birthday—
Eighteen was an important age at Eunri Escort Agency, when one was formally recognized as an adult.
I secretly hoped there might be a banquet.
But my parents seemed to think otherwise.
“Sir, there’s a rumor that a spiritual beast’s inner core has appeared in Suzhou. They say it contains strong yang energy—exactly what Euna needs.”
“Then we must go at once.”
“Seha, we’ll need to make a short trip to Suzhou. Please take good care of Soeun.”
That was all they said before leaving at dawn.
Then, for three straight days, rain poured without pause—and the carriage carrying my parents slipped off a cliff. They were declared missing.
The escort guards searched the area thoroughly for days, trying to confirm whether my parents were alive.
I waited, heart clenched tight, praying only for their return.
On the morning of my birthday, the guards who had been searching returned with heavy expressions.
“We regret to inform you… we have found the bodies.”
My parents, having fallen from the cliff, were returned to us as cold corpses.
The sudden loss shattered the fragile structure holding my heart together.
I tried desperately to recall my parents as they were in life.
But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t clearly remember their faces.
All I could recall was Mother’s profile as she fed Euna her medicine,
and Father’s back as he busied himself with escort work.
They were my sister’s parents—
not mine.
That was when Euna rubbed her eyes and climbed down from her bed.
She was wearing the white clothes Mother had sewn for her not long ago.
“Unnie… have Mother and Father come back?”
Euna was simply worried about our parents—but my gaze wouldn’t leave those clothes.
They never even paid attention to me…
The dark, sticky emotions I had been suppressing surged up my throat.
“…Eun Soeun. This is your fault!”
Euna flinched.
“Our parents died because they went to get medicine for you.”
I knew it was wrong to say it.
“If you’d never been born… Mother and Father wouldn’t have died!”
But once the words began spilling out, they wouldn’t stop.
“It’s your fault!”
I resented my sister, sick since birth.
I resented her illness.
I resented my parents for leaving this world without even leaving their faces behind.
“If only you didn’t exist—”
My head spun.
Instead of accepting my grief, I searched for someone I could hate.
I was so pathetic back then.
It felt like a massive stone had been placed on my chest.
Euna did nothing wrong…
The cruel words I spat out, unable to bear my own sorrow, must have shredded Soeun’s heart.
No matter how overwhelmed I was, it was unforgivable.
After being assaulted by my venomous words, it was only natural that Soeun now couldn’t meet my eyes.
She was a child who had lived her entire life shrinking inward because of illness. Fainting immediately after my outburst must have made the shock even worse.
Do I even have the right to approach Euna now?
My steps toward her came to a halt.
Like someone who had lost their voice, my lips trembled without sound.
I was afraid that if I called her name wrong, my sister would vanish like an illusion.
“Seha-unnie…”
Euna said my name first.
“Does it… hurt a lot?”
Her large eyes brimmed with tears, as if they might fall at any moment. After hesitating, she toddled toward me.
“Little miss, Lady Seha must be tired right now—perhaps later—”
Ignoring her nursemaid’s protest, Euna came closer.
“I’m sorry, unnie…”
Moisture pooled in Euna’s eyes.
“Soeun did something wrong…”
What? What did you do wrong?
Seeing Euna bite her lip, holding back tears, the magma in my chest boiled over.
Being sick isn’t a sin. Don’t apologize to me.
She was a precious child—one who worried about me more than her own life.
I couldn’t bear to see the sister I had wished to meet again, even if only in a dream, bowing her head like this.
I carefully stepped closer, taking in Euna’s small body.
There was no time for hesitation or self-reproach.
The fact that I could face Euna like this was a miracle.
I knelt down to meet her eyes. I felt her flinch in surprise.
Sorry. Happy. Sad. Overjoyed.
A storm of emotions I’d long buried tore through my chest.
“Euna.”
The moment I called her childhood name, tears I thought long dried surged forth.
“Unnie…”
Euna’s clear eyes filled with tears as she sniffled.
I reached out to her.
Afraid that holding her too tightly might break her, I gently pulled her into my arms and patted her back.
“…I’m sorry.”
A cracked sound escaped my parched lips.
“I’m really sorry.”
For blaming you when our parents died.
For failing to protect you when the attackers came.
For breaking my promise to live a long life with you.
Words of regret floated through my mind like mist.
“Hic… unnie…”
Euna clung tightly to me.
Her fragile body was cold, yet her forehead was warm with lingering fever.
As her warmth reached my skin, I could truly feel that Euna was alive.
“…It’s not because of you. Never.”
I whispered to her.
“Unnie said bad things because she was too sad. I’m sorry…”
“…Mm.”
As I apologized through my sobs, Euna hugged me even tighter.
“…But we won’t get to see Mother and Father anymore, right?”
Euna asked softly, sniffling.
“…No.”
She already understood that our parents were gone—and knowing it was because of my cruel words weighed heavily on me.
“Hic… unnie must miss them too… Soeun is sorry…”
Euna trembled with guilt, desperately holding back her tears, wiping at her eyes as if afraid I might get angry if she cried.
I patted her small back so she wouldn’t have to hold it in.
Even now, she worried about me.
Tears welled up in my own eyes.
Seeing my tears, Euna hiccupped and cried softly.
“Unnie…”
Her small hand reached up to wipe away my tears.
“Mother and Father won’t come back anymore… but unnie will stay by your side. For your whole life.”
I held her cheeks gently, making her look at me.
I will never lose you again.
I didn’t know how I had returned nine years into the past—but there was no doubt.
A miracle had been given to me.
“Will you give unnie another chance?”
At my whisper, Euna finally burst into tears.
“Hic… unnie… Euna too… Euna will stay by unnie’s side. I’ll protect you.”
I remembered her final day—cooling in my arms, forcing a smile even then.
My sister, who worried only about me until her last breath.
Euna… this time…
I hugged her trembling body tightly.
I will protect you.
No—that wasn’t enough.
I will make you happy. No matter what.
I would watch her grow until she filled my arms,
until she smiled brightly like peach blossoms in full bloom.
