DSFL | Chapter 58

~Chapter 58~

Idette raised her voice, making both Simon and me look at her.

“Bianca didn’t do anything wrong!”

“Ah, okay, okay. I take it back.”

I quickly backed off, surprised by Idette’s anger.

Simon seemed startled too and stuttered his words.

“W-wait, why are you getting so mad?”

“Because you were nitpicking for no reason!”

“N-nitpicking? I was just worried because she keeps making mistakes, and she’s going to Orphen soon…”

“If you’re worried, then be nice about it!”

Simon flinched and stood at attention.

…She’d make a good drill sergeant.

Idette, I think you’ve found your hidden talent.

“Simon! Can you come help over here?”

Just then, someone called Simon away.

He glanced at us briefly and walked off.

“Coming!”

Once he was gone, Idette turned to me.

“Everyone’s just on edge because they’re busy. Don’t take it too personally.”

“I’m okay! Thanks to you.”

“Really? I helped?”

She looked at me with sparkling eyes.

“Yeah? Yeah.”

“Phew, that’s good. I was worried. When I first came to the tower, no one was really welcoming either.”

“No one welcomed you?”

“Nope. That’s why I was worried about you. It’s not a great feeling, right?”

She started walking toward the stairs.

“Delivering supplies for the tower is actually a big deal. It means Peril trusts you.”

“Oh, so that’s why…”

“And Simon’s from Orphen.”

That was unexpected.

He spoke the imperial language so well.

“That’s why he’s touchy. He probably thought he’d get to see his family again.”

Ugh, now I really feel bad. Trying to explain I didn’t take his spot now would just make things worse.

Guess this is why people say you shouldn’t hold on to saying things.

“Peril, we’re here!” Even with Idette’s cheerful voice, the room was quiet.

“Maybe he stepped out?”

As I walked further in to open a window, I heard soft breathing.

There was Peril, fast asleep on the sofa.

“…He’s sleeping.”

Idette tiptoed closer.

“Wow, he actually sleeps.”

A little late to realize that, considering I was the one who disturbed his decades-long nap.

“Bianca, look at this!”

Idette, who was looking around the desk, held up a paper.

“Looks like a list of people going to Orphen…”

“Oh yeah, it does.”

“Hmm, your name’s not here. Must be under a fake name.”

Just like she said, I couldn’t find my name anywhere.

She scanned the list with her finger, then stopped at the name “Ann.”

“This must be it. I recognize all the other names.”

“You’re not going to Orphen?”

“Nope. Peril doesn’t trust me enough yet.”

Or more like, she couldn’t go because she’s related to Ailins.

“I’m not asleep.”

Suddenly, Peril spoke.

He held his forehead like he had a headache and didn’t look great.

“But we saw you sleeping! Right, Bianca?”

“Uh, yeah.”

Peril blinked slowly a few times, then sighed deeply and rubbed his face.

“Next time, wake me up.”

Idette gave me a confused glance.

Yeah, I don’t get it either.

“…That wasn’t exactly a pleasant experience.”

He clicked his tongue and stood up.

“You look really tired. Should I bring you some tea?”

Idette, ever the quick one, offered.

But she didn’t even wait for his answer before walking out of the room.

Now it was just the two of us, and I felt awkward.

“Should I leave so you can rest?”

“Stay.”

“Okay.”

Can’t say no to the master of the tower.

I awkwardly sat down, hoping he’d say something because the silence was killing me.

But Peril stayed unusually quiet.

Finally, I couldn’t take it and blurted something out.

“So… do immortals dream too?”

Ugh, my stupid mouth…

Of course they do!

I wanted to sew my lips shut.

“N-no, I just thought… maybe you had a nightmare.”

“A nightmare?”

“Or not. Never mind.”

Seriously, sometimes it’s better to just stay quiet.

Peril seemed deep in thought but then suddenly laughed.

“Forget it.”

“Saying half of something and stopping is the worst.”

So frustrating! I cleared my throat and said seriously:

“Remember I told you before? Whatever it is you want, I’ll help.”

“…”

“I’m ready to listen now.”

He let out a short sigh. I already knew what he wanted—death.

But hearing it from him would feel totally different.

I’m not the smartest, but maybe if we talked it through, we’d find a way.

…But there’s no way he’d actually tell me, right?

That face doesn’t exactly say “Let’s open up.”

Just as I was about to take my words back—

“I want eternal sleep.”

“…!”

“I’m asking you to help me die. Can you do it?”

He said it almost like a joke.

“See? That’s why I didn’t say anything.”

He nodded toward me.

I was surprised.

I hadn’t expected him to actually answer.

He looked at my face, then started to look regretful for saying anything.

I quickly jumped in.

“We’re kinda the same, you know.”

“In what way?”

“I’m human. Everyone dies eventually. So we’re not that different.”

He blinked, taken aback.

“…Didn’t expect that answer.”

“Don’t worry! You’re just… taking a little longer than most. I’ll be right behind you someday.”

“You’ve got to be kidding.”

He sighed and shook his head.

Then, after a moment of silence, he spoke quietly.

“When that time comes…”

“Yes?”

“Will you be sad?”

What does he think I am?

Of course I would be.

“I’ll probably cry the most.”

“Like last time?”

“…”

“Sorry.”

When I glared at him, he quickly apologized.

Hey! We agreed that day was off-limits!

***

“Is this the last box?”

“Yup, once you move that, you can take a break.”

At Lily’s words, I lifted the box and carefully set it down in the storage room.

“…Feels kind of satisfying.”

Looking at the stacked boxes filled me with pride.

I took off my gloves and wiped the sweat from my forehead.

As I sat down on the floor to catch my breath—

“…Here.”

A cold water bottle was suddenly handed to me, in a gruff voice.

“Simon?”

Did not expect that. I blanked for a moment before awkwardly taking the bottle.

Simon sat down next to me, staring into space, clearly not good at talking.

…Guess this is his way of apologizing.

“Thanks. I was just getting thirsty.”

I spoke carefully, but he just fidgeted with his fingers instead of replying.

He looked like he wanted to say something, but no words came out.

Well, I think I get what he wants to say anyway.

“Uh… I don’t really have a word to say in that.”

“What?”

“The list of people going to Orphen is managed by Peril. I don’t get to decide.”

Simon’s face fell instantly.

“I have my own reasons for going. And I won’t be coming back to the tower.”

“Y-you’re not becoming his student?”

“Nope. Like you said, I’m not interested in magic.”

“I-I didn’t mean it like that…”

I hesitated for a second.

“Or… maybe try asking Peril again. If it really matters that much, you should at least give it a shot.”

I hadn’t meant to say that.

But I guess hearing about his family softened me up.

Ugh, I’m too soft—it’s like a disease.