Chapter 02
‘Life is really something else.’
To think that the man who almost became her husband would now come to slit her throat.
It would be a lie to say she wasn’t scared.
But this was a future shaped by the choices Maya had made.
She remembered the oath she took when she became the Captain of the Knights.
Back then, how ignorant she had been.
She had served the wrong master, and by the time she realized it, it was already too late.
Standing at the end of her life, Maya reflected on it.
‘It was a life full of regrets.’
Now, she just wanted to be free.
Once the Emperor died, her contract would be broken. Then, her original self—Maya Pendragon—would return.
But Maya couldn’t bear that.
She was terrified and disgusted at the thought of reliving the days when she had been absorbed into the Emperor’s will.
‘I want to decide how it ends.’
With that lifelong wish in mind, Maya raised her sword one final time.
And stabbed herself.
The moment the blade pierced her heart, what she felt first was relief.
‘It’s finally over.’
Clutching her bleeding chest, Maya exhaled a shallow breath.
It felt freeing—but regret lingered.
‘If I had known it would end like this…’
Then maybe she would’ve chosen differently.
“…Maya Pendragon!”
A shrill, panicked voice called out to her.
She saw someone running toward her, a stranger in her blurred vision.
He was handsome, with striking features. Perhaps clearer than her own future—
A stranger.
‘Who is he?’
Maya frowned.
She heard voices from behind him calling him Grand Duke.
Only then did Maya realize who he was—Grand Duke Tristan.
‘So that’s what he looks like without the helmet.’
“Maya Pendragon,”
He rushed to her side, panic on his face, and supported her.
His touch was unexpectedly warm—something unfamiliar to her.
The Grand Duke, who had always seemed as cold and lofty as the northern mountains, furrowed his brows.
“Why… Why would you take your own life?”
“Because I have no reason to live.”
Cough. Maya muttered, blood splattering from her lips.
Did he see it?
The despair she had endured—despair upon despair, and more despair still.
“I just… wanted to live for someone who believed in me.”
A modest wish—yet one so hard to realize.
Tristan’s grip around her body tightened.
Could he possibly understand?
No. That was impossible.
Struggling to breathe, Maya diverted the conversation.
“But Grand Duke… you’re really handsome.”
It had been a long time since she spoke her mind so honestly, and it felt like a weight had lifted off her chest.
A monster? Yeah, right.
The man was more beautiful than anyone she had ever seen.
‘He looks younger than I thought.’
His face, still tinged with youth, surprised her.
At most, he looked like a teenager.
“You were meant to answer for your sins in proper judgment. Dying like this is cowardly. And…”
Tristan’s firm tone carried an odd urgency.
It was as if he had more to say.
The way he frantically supported her felt sincere, and the gaze he fixed on her was unwavering.
Unlike the Emperor’s murky eyes, his were clear. She knew then—he meant it when he said he wouldn’t kill her on a whim.
‘Even his personality matches that perfect face.’
Looking at Tristan, so different from the Emperor, Maya couldn’t help but revisit her past.
If Grand Duke Tristan had been her contractor instead of the Emperor, she wouldn’t have become a killer.
“I should’ve met you instead…”
Holding on to her fading consciousness, she heard his voice.
“I wanted to meet you too.”
His words surprised her.
“…Because you were the only way to break my curse.”
Even as her senses drifted away, his voice remained sweet.
But his words jolted her mind.
‘Curse?’
The Grand Duke was cursed? She had never heard that.
Was that why he always wore a helmet?
But unlike the rumors calling him a monster, there was nothing wrong with his face.
Just then, he must’ve noticed her widened eyes—Tristan smiled.
“This was finally your chance to return to your real age…”
“Losing hope is nothing new.”
The voice of one of Tristan’s followers, filled with bitterness, echoed in the shadows.
‘I’m someone who deserves to die anyway.’
Yet he said she was the only way to break his curse.
He needed her, just like the Emperor did—but he respected her choice.
It was all so unfamiliar.
As if he understood her.
Something hot stirred within her chest.
“Rest in peace.”
Tristan’s heartfelt words pierced her heart.
What curse?
Why didn’t he finish what he was saying…
Ah… she needed to hear more… but her mind was slipping away.
‘If there’s a next life, please… don’t let me repeat the same mistake.’
Maya closed her eyes with a whisper of a final prayer.
It was a deep, deep sleep.
***
Maya never believed in the afterlife.
Her life had been exhausting enough.
She didn’t want to go through it again.
So why could she still think?
‘Is this hell?’
She was definitely dead. If she still had consciousness, that could be the only explanation.
There was no way she was going to heaven—so hell made sense.
But unlike the usual hell, hers was oddly cozy.
The bedding was soft and surprisingly pleasant. Even the sunlight brushing her eyelids…
‘Wait, sunlight?’
Sunlight?
Maya gasped and opened her eyes. Squinting against the bright light, she slowly looked around.
What she saw first was a familiar ceiling.
She was speechless.
‘What the—was it all a dream?’
There was no way she could’ve survived that wound.
Then maybe she was unconscious?
‘That’s possible.’
If this was the final moment before death, it felt unfair.
If she were dreaming, she’d prefer the moment the Emperor appointed her as Knight Captain.
‘So I could chop off that bastard’s head then and there…’
But reality was harsh.
She was in her old, tiny room—before she became a knight.
‘Ugh, I hated this place.’
Since becoming Knight Captain, she had never returned home.
She hated it just as much as the Imperial Palace.
Sighing in frustration, Maya opened her eyes narrowly.
‘Let’s see.’
There had to be a reason why her subconscious was wandering here.
She looked around her room.
It was a shabby little place, only ever visited by a single maid.
As she moved, dust stirred from the old furniture. It was a stark contrast from her palace room, funded by imperial gold.
Maybe this was a chance to reflect?
‘My body feels light.’
An unease began to creep up inside her.
She urgently wanted to check her appearance.
But the small mirror in her room was stained and dirty.
Maya blew off the dust and wiped it roughly with her sleeve.
Finally, her reflection appeared.
“What the hell?”
Maya groaned at what she saw.
‘What the hell.’
She still looked like a teenager, not yet past adolescence.
And her eyes—plain brown.
‘Before awakening.’
Those who inherited the Pendragon blood awakened at the age of twenty.
Awakened ones always had eyes that burned red like fire.
That, along with the White Dragon crest, was the definitive mark of a true Pendragon heir.
Maya checked her wrist.
‘No White Dragon mark.’
Definitely before her awakening.
She sighed.
‘What a shame.’
Maya had always been skilled—but after her awakening as a Swordmaster, her swordsmanship became almost inhuman.
‘Guess I can’t use White Dragon either.’
The sword she named White Dragon could only be summoned from her crest.
It was the very weapon that helped her overcome prejudice against her youth and gender, and rise to the position of Knight Captain.
Even though the Emperor personally appointed her, many had raged over some “young girl” becoming the captain.
There were no fond memories before age twenty.
She endured wounds from her family in silence, survived by her sword.
‘Still, nothing compares to the Emperor’s bullshit.’
As she dug through memories, Maya paused.
‘Wasn’t this around the time that proposal arrived?’
She never even made it to the debutante ball because of her wretched family.
And there was no way a proper proposal would come to a house that only had its name left.
That is, until Grand Duke Tristan’s letter arrived.
‘…’
She shook her head, remembering his face.
As much as he was her type, she had no intention of accepting his proposal.
Growl. Her stomach rumbled.
Even in her subconscious, her stomach kept track of time.
‘Food is important.’
Back then, it was the only joy she had as Knight Captain.
Before that, books were her only escape.
‘If I’m hungry, I should eat.’
Primal needs should be satisfied.
It was a pure desire, untouched by anyone else’s will.
How long had it been since she felt something that was truly her own?
With bold steps, Maya headed to the dining room—one she was never invited to.
Her stride didn’t waver.
