Chapter 1
. The World Turns Pure White
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“I’m sorry—”
I got rejected.
My childhood friend, the one who had always been by my side throughout my entire life.
It happened behind the school building after our high school graduation ceremony. From spring onward, we’d be going to different universities. I thought maybe we’d start drifting apart, and that’s why I decided—today, I had to confess my feelings.
Tears welled up quickly in Rika’s eyes.
I must have shocked her. To realize I’d been seeing her in that way. When it was just the two of us, she’d always been so unguarded, so open.
Even if she turned me down, I honestly thought she’d laugh it off.
But in those tear-filled, wide eyes, I didn’t see reproach. Only the color of compassion, like she was worried about my feelings. She was thinking she’d hurt me.
Why is it that I can understand something like that? When the truth is, I never really understood Rika at all.
“Yugo…”
She said my name, but no other words followed. Her eyes still glistened with tears.
Ahhh. I want to crawl into a hole. What the hell was I getting all worked up about by myself? Even if I tried to play it off, Rika could clearly tell I was being serious.
Otherwise, why would she be staring so straight at me without blinking, without looking away, even as her eyes filled with tears?
So this is what they mean when they say “your mind goes blank.”
My breathing grew shallow, my field of vision narrowed. Like sunlight scattering in every direction, the world around me was shrinking into a blinding white.
And still, I couldn’t tear my eyes away from Rika’s.
I knew I had to say something. But what? I was the one who hurt her, wasn’t I? And yet, she was the one worrying about me.
The whiteness crept further and further into my vision.
So this is how weak I really am. Even in self-mockery, the person who came to mind was still Rika. Her large, beautiful eyes blurred, then disappeared altogether. My sight went pure white, my mind empty.
We’d lived next door since we were born, done everything together.
Even this morning, we’d walked to school side by side. Kindergarten, elementary, middle school, high school… Today we’d laughed about how it was our last time going together.
I’d decided then—I would confess after graduation.
“I want you to listen without laughing,”
I’d said, trying to sound cool. That was my mistake.
Unable to bear it anymore, I covered my face with both hands. What expression was I supposed to wear? What face could I possibly show her?
—Wait, what?
In the middle of that blinding white, I could see my own palms.
When I lowered my hands, everything before me was still pure light, yet I could see my own body—my hands, arms, legs, torso.
What the hell? Do people get so shocked that they can only see themselves?
“Rika!”
I shouted, calling out for the girl who should have been standing before me. But no reply came. I couldn’t even see the ground. Was I… floating? Flying? What was this feeling?
Was I about to pass out?
God, I’m pathetic.
Rika had seen me at my most disgraceful yet again. We’d never been the type to keep secrets from each other, but to show her this, right before we parted ways for good—this had to be the worst.
Ahhh. At this point, whatever.
Just as the strength drained from my body, a color broke into my white vision—the vivid hue of blue.
Long, blue hair.
—What the hell? A gal?
A girl with hair so long it fell past her waist, lying there in lingerie that matched her dazzling blue hair. Clothes strewn across the floor, along with some scroll-like things scattered around the room.
—A room? Wait… where am I?
My panicked eyes accidentally fell on the deep cleavage of the blue-haired girl. I jerked my gaze away. Even Rika, unguarded as she always was, had never shown herself in just underwear.
The walls were stone, the ceiling wooden. The beams painted a deep vermilion, patterned with golden lines. Plush red cords dangled down…
Where was I? Had the shock of being rejected made me lose my memory? Was I sleepwalking? A daydream? Was this really happening? Does heartbreak do this to you?
Suddenly, Rika’s voice replayed in my ears: “I’m sorry—”
I shut my eyes tight, tilting my head back. I got dumped. I really got dumped.
Her words repeated over and over inside my head. “I’m sorry—.” I wanted to drown them out, to replace them with any other sound. Outside the room was noisy. Rain pattered down. Between those sounds, I heard soft breathing—the blue-haired girl’s, probably.
But still, Rika’s “I’m sorry—” filled my head, refusing to leave. I kept seeing her tearful eyes staring into mine.
Unable to endure it, I opened my eyes again—only for the lingerie-clad blue-haired girl to fill my vision.
If I stared too much, I had no idea what kind of accusations I might face. But if I didn’t focus on something, Rika’s image would just swell larger in my head. So I stared vaguely at the girl, unfocused.
Her figure was stunning—like something off the cover of a manga magazine, maybe even more. No matter how much I tried to blur my focus, this was still my first time seeing a girl in her underwear in real life. My cheeks burned, though my heart remained heavy.
Every time I thought “She’s got a chest as big as Rika’s—” the image of tearful Rika appeared again.
Actually, her face looked like Rika’s too. Practically identical. Or was I just so hung up that everyone looked like her now? In the dim light, I tried to take a closer look at the blue-haired girl’s face.
—Dim light?
A few lanterns glowed faintly in the room. Startled, I looked for a window. In the stone wall, I spotted a small opening. Outside was pitch dark. And pouring rain.
Night? But it had been just before noon when the graduation ceremony ended! How much time had I lost?
Even as Rika’s image and voice continued to replay vividly in my mind, the bizarre situation before me began to settle my panic.
Just then, the vermilion-painted door burst open with a loud slam.
A woman with long black hair rushed into the room.
Wait, what—?
A girl in her underwear. Clothes scattered everywhere. A dimly lit room in disarray. Wasn’t this exactly the kind of situation that looked bad? I had no memory of how I got here, but anyone walking in would doubt me.
If Rika saw this, it would only make her cry more—
The black-haired woman who had slammed the door shut turned toward me.
Her eyes blazed with a fiery crimson light.
