~Chapter 18~
“Josephine, are you alright?”
“Ah… Tilla.”
It was Tilla. She looked at me with pity and gently placed her arm around my shoulders. Her sudden kindness caught me off guard.
“You look beautiful today, Josephine. Well, you’ve always been beautiful, of course.”
“……”
“You must’ve made up your mind at last — to walk the same path as me.”
Her blue eyes shimmered, tinged with sorrow and empathy.
“You seem tense. Want to toast, Josephine?”
Without waiting for my answer, she tapped her glass against mine.
Clink. A clear ring sounded. She smiled brightly and downed her drink, then motioned for me to follow.
I was parched anyway. With shaking hands, I lifted my glass and gulped the champagne. The deep thirst from all the stress seemed to ease just a bit. I almost wished I’d pass out from the alcohol.
“This is a gift. You saved my life, Josephine.”
“Huh?”
“Special contraceptives. They work fast and dull the pain. The first time feels like your body’s being split apart. But honestly, it’s better to be out of your mind than in agony.”
“…What are you saying?”
That’s when I realized — she had slipped it into my drink under the guise of a hug.
“I was ordered to do this… I had no choice. But I didn’t want you to suffer. Oh, there can be side effects… I hope you can endure them.”
She tapped my shoulder with her fingertips and walked away.
A flush of heat spread from deep inside me. What kind of drug was this? Barely minutes passed before my head swam and my face felt like it was on fire.
A strange warmth swirled in my lower belly. A tingling pressure — not quite pain, but urgent — bloomed between my thighs.
My back stiffened from the unfamiliar sensation. It felt like standing on a cliff’s edge. I tried deep breathing, but only hot gasps came out.
I wanted to flee — but even walking was hard. If I didn’t get away now, something humiliating would happen. I staggered to the outermost terrace, fumbling along the wall.
As I gripped the railing, the door behind me suddenly burst open.
“Are you Josephine of Iote? Is that you?”
A familiar voice made me spin around.
“…Anton.”
In this moment, he felt like salvation itself.
Anton rushed over and caught me in his arms.
“So that really was you earlier…”
He examined me, horror in his eyes.
“H-Help me… please…”
I clung to him desperately.
Suddenly, I was swept off the ground.
Anton cradled me in his arms and leapt over the terrace railing — nearly three stories high. Yet his landing was quiet and effortless.
It was a midsummer night, the moonlight pouring down. Wind rushed past our ears as he ran swiftly, carrying me.
I didn’t know where we were going. I couldn’t even open my eyes — my body was overwhelmed.
My heart pounded wildly. I gasped for air, but it wasn’t enough. All that escaped were strangled breaths.
“Haa… ahh…”
The fact that I couldn’t control even my breathing made me feel utterly powerless. Trembling, I clung tighter to Anton’s shoulder.
Soon, the moonlight faded. Dim oil-lamp light spilled through my lashes. Anton had entered a building with me.
I didn’t know where we were. We hadn’t left the imperial grounds… had we?
My body burned with a fever, vision blurred.
He supported my neck and gently laid me down. Something soft — like a bed — cradled my back. I cracked open my eyes and reached toward his silhouette.
“Haa… Anton…”
I needed warmth. Even though I was burning, human touch felt desperately necessary.
My trembling fingers brushed his cheek. It was warm. I cupped his face with my hands and gently stroked it.
I’m not alone. That simple truth gave me a sliver of peace.
“Lonely…”
The word escaped and vanished into the air.
Only after being drugged did I realize: since coming to the Ruby Palace, I had shut everyone out. There had never been anyone by my side. I’d clung to the illusion of the convent, and loneliness had settled thick like dust.
Hoo. Anton sighed deeply.
I could finally see the outline of his face.
His hand reached out, caressing my cheek with his callused palm.
“So this is where that bastard kissed you.”
He rubbed my temple with his thumb. The pressure of his fingerprint was sharp against my skin. I gasped involuntarily.
“I was late. It’s my fault. I had my reasons, but… no excuses.”
His voice was pained.
I stared at him, dazed. Slowly, my eyes focused. His face came into view clearly now.
Something was boiling in his eyes — like molten gold. He was angry. But why?
“What did that bastard give you? What’s wrong with your condition?”
“Tilla… gave me something.”
My breathing hitched.
“…What kind of drug?”
“Special… contraceptive. Said… it’d hurt. First time… h-hurts, so…”
“Damn it. I can’t even make you spit it out now.”
He cursed, running a hand through his hair.
“And your lips… what’s with these?”
He pressed his thumb against my lower lip and smudged it sideways.
“You’re red enough without this nonsense.”
“Mmm…”
His touch made me nervous. I tried to breathe, but the tight dress squeezed my chest painfully.
“Anton… hnn… please, loosen this…”
I turned and groaned. I wanted him to untie the back of my bodice.
“Is that something a man should do?”
“No… it’s just… too tight…”
Frowning, he reached behind me.
Rustle, rustle. His rough fingers undid the ribbon at my back.
“Haa… I can breathe again.”
My chest, once tightly pressed, returned to its normal shape. The loosened fabric slipped down, revealing some skin.
“Ugh…”
As my breathing calmed, the heat surged again. My skin prickled like scales. Everything felt hypersensitive.
My head was foggy, like it had been submerged underwater. A sharp pressure coiled low in my belly.
I closed my eyes.
The Third Prince had publicly displayed his desire for me.
Tilla probably gave me the drug after watching us dance.
Tonight… I was likely fated to give myself to him.
I had struggled so hard not to be shamed — yet in the end, I would meet the same fate as the other Ruby Palace princesses.
Even my father said it himself. This was a fate I could not escape.
The more I realized it, the drier my lips became — my mouth cracked open like a desert.
