“…Are you serious?”
“Of course I am.”
Haein’s voice, muffled against Siyul’s chest as she pulled him into her arms, was tinged with something dark.
Like a shadow lingering beneath the effort to appear bright.
Like a fragile star.
Within the pitch-black of herself, Haein felt the faint light of a star.
“Kang, you always tell me you love me.”
On that day when everything she loved had been torn away at once, leaving her hollow and empty, it was he who had filled the void in her chest.
If all she had lost was the dazzling moon, then Siyul was the star by its side.
He could never outshine the moon, could never burn brighter, but he was still one of the countless shining lights.
Something just as precious.
The tragedy was that no miracle could ever make a star take the moon’s place.
Even if both were loved, even if love was equal, there was no changing where she would inevitably return.
“But I think I’ve only ever listened.”
Hae-in held him close, as though soothing him.
She pressed her cheek to his forehead as he turned and exhaled a slow breath. Leaning against him, she wanted to speak.
I’m sorry I can’t give up everything for you. Let me hold you. I still love you.
Even if you’ll one day be buried completely in moonlight, just for now, I want to hold you tight.
Her heart was overflowing with that feeling.
She knew it was greedy, that it would only bring her pain later—but still, she couldn’t stop.
The more Haein’s eyes whispered, the more Siyul seemed to lose strength. One by one, his unyielding defenses fell away, leaving him exposed.
“I thought something like this would come… much later.”
“So did I.”
It was no wonder he hesitated to accept this moment.
Hae-in herself had never imagined she’d feel this way.
But the bigger her heart grew, the shorter their time seemed. Terrifyingly fast.
“Before I realized how little time we had, I thought so too.”
“…”
Siyul’s expression grew more complicated.
But the moment Hae-in came to him, pressing her body against his chest, he felt dizzy, breathless.
It made him sad, more than glad.
How much time is even left, for her to be like this?
He knew she wouldn’t give him an answer. All he could guess was that it was shorter than he wanted to imagine.
Maybe the reason she kept crying wasn’t the dead creature at all. Maybe it was simply because the thought of parting was unbearable.
One after another, fears plagued him. But then—
“Kang, I really like you.”
“…Me too.”
“For the first time in my life… I love you.”
At those words, everything else scattered.
In that moment, Siyul thought only this: if the woman in his arms told him to die, he would.
Whatever she said, he had to grant it.
As he wrapped his arms around her slender waist, heat surged through his body.
With her cheek pressed into his neck, all he could think was that in this instant, she was his.
Suddenly, the long night began.
A night where it didn’t matter who belonged to whom—because in the end, they were one.
________✧⑅˖♡∘˚˳°↝^._.^_________
Hae-in sat quietly on the bed.
She was docile, obedient, like something well-tamed.
Her neck, tilted slightly to the side, looked unbearably delicate.
The white line of her shoulders and waist was smooth like a child’s skin, and the curves down her hips, knees, and ankles glowed like flowing light.
There was something dizzying in those soft lines.
Bared without a single shield, she wasn’t defenseless—she was lethal.
Hae-in, who had been quietly watching Siyul approach, suddenly darted to the window and carefully drew the curtains shut.
Then she returned to the bed, her eyes glittering.
“What was that?”
“In case someone saw.”
“You do know what floor we’re on, right?”
“Of course.”
She even flashed him a thumbs-up. Siyul, half-amused, couldn’t hold back his laughter as he climbed onto the bed.
What followed was…
Touching, and being touched, with tender hands.
Kisses with closed eyes. Every moment sharp, vivid, like joy that would never end.
As her voice seeped directly into his ear, Siyul’s eyes fluttered open and closed.
In the dimly lit room, there was nothing but Hae-in.
The soft woman who clung to his neck, brushing her cheek against him wherever she touched.
Does she even know she smells like cotton candy?
Maybe it was because she loved sweets. Or maybe it was her shampoo. Either way, when he held her this close, the sweetness was overwhelming.
It made him want to devour her.
Siyul pressed his lips beneath her ear.
“Mmm, that tickles.”
Her little whimper made him chuckle. In the end, he was the one being seduced.
He hadn’t thought she’d take the lead.
But of course she would—wasn’t she a cat? Ignoring him when called, yet curling up against him when he stayed still.
Impossible to pin down. And so, he had no choice but to drown in her.
Siyul lifted Haein’s hands, which had been clutching the sheets, and placed them firmly against himself.
He pressed his lips to her collarbone.
Held her tight, hard enough to feel her ribs beneath his arms.
Under his shadow, he sought her.
Met her gaze, tangled his eyes with hers.
“…Do you love me?”
“I like you.”
He could see her shy smile, so he met her gaze and pressed his lips against hers.
As their eyes stayed locked, their lips touched slowly—so faintly that it was as if nothing at all had brushed against him.
It was so light, so subtle, that he could barely register the warmth of another’s body.
It was simply like being absorbed into her.
Their tongues brushed, tentative at first.
Tap, tap.
Like breathing, fleeting touches. Then suddenly, the contact deepened—but neither of them was surprised.
There would never be another conversation so intimate, so tender, so full of love as this.
I love you. I adore you.
The slow, deep kiss in this moment was being used to say exactly that.
“Kisses?”
“…I love them too. They feel so good.”
Their lips barely parted, still pressed together as if they couldn’t stand to break apart, whispering constantly between breaths.
At that, Si-yul let out a soft laugh and returned the favor with a flurry of small kisses.
Kiss after kiss, she drowned him in them.
“You know… before, I thought I’d regret this. But now… I think I’d regret it more if I never knew you.”
Overcome with happiness, Hae-in kissed Si-yul’s cheek with a quick peck as she confessed.
The sensation was soft, a little damp, a little springy… utterly tormenting in the sweetest way.
Si-yul inhaled sharply, catching himself before his emotions surged completely out of control.
________✧⑅˖♡∘˚˳°↝^._.^_________
Beep—
Beep—
The alarm kept ringing.
But Si-yul, oblivious, was still fast asleep.
“…You’re not dead, right?”
Hae-in had already woken earlier and was fidgeting around when she noticed how utterly motionless he was. She poked at his side, poke, poke, growing uneasy.
Normally, she wouldn’t worry about something like this. But after last night, she couldn’t help it…
Because she hadn’t realized until then just how much stamina it would take, and the thought had been eating at her ever since.
She bit her lip, anxiously waiting for his tightly shut eyelashes to flutter open.
“No… he’s breathing, so… it can’t be a coma, right?”
Just how much energy did that yang-qi of his even have?
She had trusted the reaper’s words that he wouldn’t die easily, but honestly… how trustworthy was a reaper supposed to be?
Looking grim, Hae-in gnawed at her thumbnail.
Should I splash cold water on his face…?
“Ahhh!”
Lost in thought, she suddenly yelped when something clamped around the sole of her bare foot. She jumped in fright.
Of course, the culprit was Si-yul—after all, they were the only two in the bed.
He was pretending to sleep?!
“You scared me! What do you think you’re doing?!”
“Heh. What are you doing?”
“What do you mean, what am I doing?!”
“You were staring so hard, I thought maybe you’d kiss me awake.”
Her worries evaporated as he stretched lazily and sat up, glancing around the room.
“…What are you looking for?”
“Mm, haven’t you seen my phone? The alarm was ringing a second ago.”
“It fell under the bed.”
It had been on the bed the night before, but at some point, it must have slipped down.
A nuisance, so to speak.
“It’s not here.”
Realizing she was still wrapped in nothing but a sheet, Hae-in hesitated before pointing toward the direction of the fallen phone, only letting one hand slip out from her cocoon.
“Over there.”
“Ah, thanks.”
Who’s he planning to call the moment he wakes up?
If it was Tae-il, he wouldn’t be back until tomorrow afternoon anyway. Was there anyone else? Besides… it was only seven in the morning.
“Why? Who are you calling?”
“The hospital.”
“The hospital?”
“To tell them I can’t come in. I’ll have to pretend I’m sick.”
…You don’t exactly look sick, though.
He looked perfectly fine, especially after she’d been worrying moments ago whether he was even alive.
Perplexed, Hae-in tilted her head. Maybe he was hurt somewhere, even if it didn’t show. Her face went pale.
This is because of me, isn’t it?!
Forgetting all modesty, she scrambled across the bed on her knees and pressed close behind him.
“Wait—are you in pain? Where?”
Fumbling, she touched his bare skin here and there, checking for fever or strain.
“Are you really hurting? Badly?”
“…It’s called faking it.”
“Huh?”
“I said I’m pretending.”
“For… what reason?”
“What, you thought it was over already?”
He looked at her as if she were the foolish one.
Hae-in froze with a dumb expression, then slowly scooted backward once she realized what he meant.
If his yang-qi wouldn’t run out first, then surely her stamina would.
“Tomorrow Tae-il comes back. I’ve got to make the most of it before then.”
Pretty sure you’ve made more than enough already. Taking sick leave for this… really?
“Don’t you think?”
“I do not!”
“I’m not satisfied yet.”
“Well, I am!”
She shook her head with all her might, but it didn’t matter—he caught her again easily. Si-yul was insatiable like that.
And Hae-in… didn’t truly hate that greed.
________✧⑅˖♡∘˚˳°↝^._.^_________
Worried someone might ask whether a young woman was living in that house, Hae-in always checked the entrance before going out, making sure no one was around.
She would then slip quietly outside and take the stairs.
The building had two apartments per floor, so with a little caution, it wasn’t difficult.
Her outings were usually short, just long enough to get the 500 won she needed.
“Mom! It’s me.”
[Oh, hey.]
“Everything okay at home? How’s Haegang?”
A few minutes’ walk from Tae-il’s house, Hae-in had found a public phone. From there, she occasionally called home to check in.
It was always just quick questions about her mom and younger brother, but she’d gotten better at timing it—once or twice a month was possible now.
She’d learned the two men’s daily rhythms, their range of movement, and managed to carve out these slivers of freedom.
[We’re fine here. Where are you these days?]
“Me? …I’m flying out again tomorrow. Just came by to drop off some things.”
[Good grief, abroad again? I’ll never understand you. Wandering around like some backpacker at your age. Are you even working?]
“Of course. This is work. Research, remember?”
Since she’d lived independently, contact with her family had been sparse anyway. Excuses like this worked well enough.
And luckily, the timing of her disappearance coincided with one of her supposed trips, so her family just assumed it was her wanderlust acting up again.
[So when are you coming home?]
“Well… home…”
[Christmas, you’ll be with your friends again, I suppose. How about New Year’s? It’s your father’s memorial.]
“Of course, I’ll be there.”
After her father’s death, Hae-in had been unable to draw for a long time.
The loss was crushing. He had understood and supported her work more than anyone.
Perhaps because that grief struck in her happiest days, she became especially prone to creative slumps.
Her work was inconsistent, her life unstable, her moods easily frayed.
She hadn’t wanted her family to see those ugly moments, so she’d moved out early.
When things got tough, she never said she was in pain—she simply hid away, like burrowing underground.
Her mother knew that about her and always just waited silently.
Even if she seemed cold, she wasn’t. Of everyone Hae-in knew, her mother was the one most like her.
[It’s fine if you don’t come home often. But at least call more, okay?]
“I will.”
[That’s my girl. You talk well.]
If she could, Hae-in would have gone home far more often.
But too many restrictions bound her. She had to stay hidden from both Si-yul and Tae-il. The reaper’s curse was both a help and a hindrance.
She couldn’t even speak her own name.
If anyone asked, her mouth locked up like she’d forgotten.
Her age, her ID number, even basic facts about her life—if she tried, her voice would freeze.
Even writing was impossible. The moment she realized someone was watching her, her hand would stop moving.
Because the one watching her… was her own subconscious.
And no one could ever deceive themselves.
“I’m just busy, that’s all.”
[All right. But don’t overwork yourself. It’ll only hurt you.]
“I’m fine.”
[Sigh, you never listen. A normal life is all you need. Just live like everyone else. Got it?]
“…Got it.”
Yeah, I want a normal life too. I hate this unstable body. I just want to go back to the way I was.
But lately, there was something catching, snagging at that desire.
She thought of Si-yul. Yet honestly, even keeping herself together was already a struggle.
[You’re eating properly, right? Not just skipping meals?]
She closed her eyes.
Leaning against the cold receiver of the public phone, Hae-in’s voice trembled.
“…Mom, I miss you.”
Standing at a merciless crossroads, all that rose inside her was pain.
