Chapter 4
After leaving the office and passing through the training grounds, I heard Kiern’s voice behind me.
“Commander, did you meet with Captain Alonso?”
“Yeah.”
Kiern’s attire was lighter than it had been in the dining hall earlier.
Looks like he planned to train at the practice grounds even on his day off. No wonder he hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol.
“So when is the next subjugation?”
“One week.”
Despite the irritation clear in my tone, Kiern continued asking questions without hesitation.
“We haven’t even been back for a full week yet.”
“If you don’t like it, you can sit this one out.”
Realizing I was joking, Kiern chuckled.
“I’m just happy. We only just returned, and the next mission’s already scheduled. As expected of you, Commander.”
“Quiet. We’ll go with the minimum number of people and finish quickly. You handle the necessary supplies.”
“I’ll make sure we can leave immediately in a week. Oh—should I prepare your bedding separately as well?”
Bedding?
I stopped mid-stride and turned around.
Tilting his head in confusion, Kiern looked at me as I crooked a finger, motioning him closer.
When he leaned down to my height, I flicked his forehead lightly with my thumb and middle finger.
“Uh…?”
Clutching his forehead with a bewildered expression, it didn’t seem like he’d been joking.
“Why would you prepare my bedding?”
“Well, last time you said your sleeping arrangements were uncomfortable.”
Do subordinates usually worry about their commander’s sleeping conditions? If it were me, I wouldn’t care if Alonso Vargas froze to death.
I scanned Kiern suspiciously.
Lately, his overly familiar attitude toward me had been downright questionable.
That said, I didn’t doubt his abilities. He had talent—and worked incredibly hard.
“Stop doing unnecessary things and just prepare what’s actually needed.”
Kiern fidgeted with his fingers, clearly displeased, but didn’t say anything.
“No answer?”
“Yes.”
“That lacked conviction. Want to get a proper dressing-down?”
“If it’s from you, Commander, I’ll take it.”
Was he insane? Still grinning, he looked so earnest that I couldn’t help but let out a short laugh.
As if truly waiting for it, Kiern stared at me blankly. I lightly punched his shoulder and walked ahead.
“That’s enough. Stop following me.”
I headed straight for the stables, where my beloved horse, Laura, greeted me with a snort.
First, I needed to return to the estate and pack. Come to think of it, it had been nearly a month since I’d last seen my brother.
After the previous subjugation, I’d stayed in the residence provided by the emperor to submit reports.
If Pavel found out I was leaving again in just a few days, he’d probably cling to my leg and beg me not to go. Only now did I start worrying about him.
Did he finish the books I gave him? Has he been attending the temple properly?
The longer I’d been away, the more questions I had. I couldn’t afford to waste the entire week comforting him while he begged me to stay.
Maybe I should just leave without telling him?
Lost in thought, I took the reins.
As I rode out through the castle gates, everyone’s attention turned to me. I heard whispers following in my wake.
I wasn’t trying to listen—but years of fighting monsters had left my hearing perpetually alert.
“Look! That’s Shiona Rodriz.”
“That’s her? The one who fights monsters alone and wins?”
“Didn’t you hear? They say her whole body’s covered in some kind of hardened vinyl. And when she fights, extra arms grow out of her shoulders!”
Was I even human anymore?
The rumors were too ridiculous to bother correcting.
I’d always been at the center of gossip in the empire. Most of it was so absurd I doubted anyone truly believed it.
“Still, makes sense. You’d need four arms to fight monsters, right?”
“Not just monsters. They say there’s no one who can match her on the entire continent.”
There were a few idiots who believed it. But I couldn’t possibly hunt them down one by one to correct them.
At least these rumors were harmless. They were so far removed from reality that few people would take them seriously.
Still, I wished the rumors were cuter—like having fairy wings or scattering flowers wherever I went.
Sometimes—no, often—I wondered what my life would have been like if I hadn’t joined the knight order.
By now, I’d probably be the belle of high society, setting the hearts of imperial men aflame…
It was fortunate for them that they’d escaped such lovesickness—but incredibly irritating for me.
No matter how I thought about it, it was deeply unfair.
Isn’t this supposed to be a romance novel? Why does romance only happen to the female lead?
I used to believe that, like a protagonist, every man I met would eventually fall in love with me.
I didn’t realize back then that men naturally gravitated toward the female lead simply because she was the female lead.
By the time I realized that truth, I was already thoroughly ground down by knight life.
Once reality sank in, I wanted to quit everything and move to the countryside—despite never having grown a single plant in my life.
But even that proved impossible. Alonso threatened to die if I left, my subordinates put on tearful performances, and in the end, I gave up.
Damn it. Thinking back on those tear-soaked memories made the back of my neck ache.
After riding through the central district and into quieter streets, I soon arrived at the estate.
As I entered, the butler Robert greeted me.
“Miss, we’ve been waiting for your return.”
Taking my cumbersome cloak, Robert followed behind me as he spoke.
“The Marquis and Marchioness will likely return this evening.”
“What about Pavel?”
“Well, actually, the young master—”
“Sister!”
Robert’s words were drowned out by another voice.
Turning around, I saw Pavel running toward me from the end of the hallway.
Though he’d grown tall enough to surpass me, he still looked like a child in my eyes. I opened my arms, and he ran straight into them.
“Why didn’t you come home right away? I’ve been counting the days waiting for you.”
After our hug, Pavel complained in a sulky voice. Having someone wait for me like this was something I was truly grateful for.
“I had to report to Captain Alonso first. And there was a gathering with the knights.”
At once, sparks seemed to fly from Pavel’s eyes, accompanied by the sound of teeth grinding.
“That bald bastard…”
“Huh? Pavel?”
Despite me never telling him about Alonso’s lack of hair, Pavel somehow knew not only his appearance but his awful personality too.
Had he secretly investigated him?
Pavel’s intense interest in Alonso worried me—especially the open hostility.
Where is that level of hatred coming from?
In the original story, Pavel killed Alonso because he was the male lead Ricardo Berg’s mentor.
But now?
Thanks—or unfortunately—since I joined the knight order, the novel’s flow had changed slightly.
Unlike in the story, Alonso Vargas was no longer Ricardo’s mentor. I’d taken that role instead. Watching the awkward relationship between those two was uncomfortable even for me.
There was no real reason for Pavel to hate Alonso Vargas.
Confused, I asked,
“Pavel, why do you dislike Captain Alonso so much?”
“Alonso Vargas isn’t the only one. Duke Berg is just as repulsive.”
…Wait. Duke Berg too?
Hating someone was a natural human emotion. But in Pavel’s case, it required caution.
That hatred could grow—and become the catalyst that turned him into a villain.
It might feel unfair to Pavel, but having confirmed the possibility through the novel, I couldn’t just ignore it.
“Why do you dislike Duke Berg?”
“Because you dislike them, Sister.”
I did dislike them. I thought I hid it well—but apparently not.
Still, I couldn’t tell him the truth.
“You’re mistaken. I love all of humanity.”
I wanted to appear kind and righteous in my brother’s eyes. It was part of my strategy—hoping he’d follow that example and walk the right path.
“Sister… you don’t have to lie to me.”
“……”
Pavel was sharper than I expected. This wasn’t the first time he’d seen through my facade.
I’d done my best to help him grow up properly.
But I was always busy. I lacked the time to have long conversations with him, and there was a limit to how closely I could watch over him.
I received reports from servants, but I couldn’t monitor everything happening beyond my sight.
Truthfully, over the past ten years, I’d grown numb to the fact that this world was a novel.
Surely he wouldn’t kill anyone.
My brother is kind—he’ll be fine.
That complacency had settled in.
If I hadn’t recently met the novel’s female lead, I probably wouldn’t have started worrying so seriously about the future.
Emilia Dua.
She was the central female protagonist of the novel.
The presence she carried was overwhelming. Just a brief glance made her feel inhuman.
At the same time, I felt uneasy. Seeing the female lead confirmed that this really was the world of a novel.
And the story I’d taken lightly began resurfacing, piece by piece.
Pavel Rodriz—the villain who killed countless people, including Emilia before her regression, and Alonso Vargas.
What if Pavel really became a murderer like in the novel? What if the story followed its predetermined ending regardless of my efforts?
The Pavel I knew had nothing to do with killing. He was gentle, kind—and except when it came to me, he rarely even lost his temper.
But what if he’s hiding another side I don’t know about?
No matter how closely I watched him, I didn’t spend that much time with him. There had to be sides of him I’d never seen.
Holding Pavel’s hand, I asked quietly,
“Pavel, do you remember what I told you before?”
“I write down everything you say and keep it, but there may be things I’ve missed. I’ll work harder.”
“No, you don’t need to work harder… just remember this. If someone—”
“If someone stabs me in the back, I should tell you everything.”
Impressive memory. A villain did need a sharp mind, after all.
“And if you ever start hating someone or feeling overwhelmed with anger, you should tell me honestly.”
“Exactly. You don’t need to handle things yourself. That’s wasteful and unnecessary. And if your delicate hands were to get hurt, wouldn’t that be a tragic loss for humanity?”
“Sister, I’m not so petty as to get angry over a little betrayal.”
“‘Stabbed in the back’ was a metaphor. I mean anything that makes your emotions hard to control—don’t hide it. Tell me.”
Thankfully, Pavel trusted my words absolutely.
Perhaps it was gratitude toward the sister who saved him when he was young. Sometimes, he felt less like a brother and more like a fiercely loyal dog.
Pavel nodded and smiled brightly. Unlike me, his warm yellow eyes shone clearly.
Every time I saw that gentle face, the same question surfaced.
This kid was the villain? Does that make any sense?
I wasn’t saying this just because he was my brother—Pavel was far too beautiful.
