BTCATL 51

Chapter 51

“Have you been well all this time, Asila?”

I had been standing frozen for quite a while, as if nailed to the spot, until I snapped back to reality when Ldin spoke softly with a gentle smile.

“…Ah, why, here, why, no, how…?”

I stammered, completely caught off guard by Ldin’s unexpected appearance.

“May I come in?”

At his low voice, I instinctively stepped aside.

Ldin’s gaze swept over the messy papers scattered on the table and bed as he entered the room.

Blinking, I pressed my trembling hands firmly together to stop them from shaking.

Even when he was angry, Ldin was someone who spoke with a gentle smile.

I desperately wanted to know what he was thinking now, but at the same time, I was afraid.

As if sensing my thoughts, Ldin’s blue eyes flickered as they fixed on me.

What was reflected in those eyes?

Sadness? Guilt?

Ah, ah.

Though I wondered why I felt this way, my lips pressed tightly as the emotion surged.

If words that seemed like accusations came from his mouth, I really…

Really…

“…L-Ldin?”

Before I realized it, I was embraced firmly in his arms. I felt the warm comfort wrapping around my body.

For a long while, he held me tightly without saying a word.

As if suspecting I might try to run away somewhere, he really gripped me firmly and wouldn’t let go.

I could feel Ldin’s unique fresh scent calming my anxious heart just a little.

After some time, Ldin gently held my shoulder and pulled me away, locking his gaze on my eyes.

He had apparently rushed here, his usually tied-up silver hair now unbound and disheveled.

His clear, blue eyes were staring straight at me.

The handsome man with silver hair filled my vision.

“Don’t think about anything anymore.”

Then, at some point, Ldin clenched his teeth and spoke in a low voice.

His words were disjointed and without a subject.

Don’t think… about anything anymore?

I lifted my head at his words that hit me like a sudden gust in my already fragile state.

The “thoughts” he was talking about—could I interpret that as I wished?

I looked at him with desperate, trembling eyes.

His face was so close I could hear his breathing; I gazed into those blue eyes that reflected my shaky form.

The light in his ocean-blue eyes rippled.

The emotions I felt from those eyes were much more complex than before.

Sadness and anger intertwined, his eyes piercing right through me.

Ah. He was angry.

Ldin’s face, wiped clean of all smiles, was expressionless to the point of fear.

Yet, from the hand that gently held me, warmth radiated, so I flinched but stood still, meeting his gaze.

The fierceness was gathering in Ldin’s eyes as if he was scrutinizing me.

Was he disappointed? Regretting bringing me to the tower? Regretting having met me?

Regretting the fact that he reached out to me…?

A rough energy swirled around Ldin. It was the first time I’d seen him unable to control his energy like this.

A man who always maintained polite composure now looked so broken by anger.

I moved my lips slightly. Resignation wrapped around my chest.

Part of me was angry and hurt that terrible rumors, caused by people from a horrifying past and not by me, had spread to my precious current friends.

But it was so hard.

“…I’m sorry.”

The moment I apologized, Ldin’s eyes opened wide.

“…What are you saying, Asila?”

I wanted to explain to him. That it was a misunderstanding. That he was wrong. That it wasn’t true.

The one who saved me, the one I first learned to trust, thought of me even for a moment as that person, and it tore my heart apart.

I was sad and frustrated.

Maybe from now on, I wouldn’t see his smile again. The deep curve of those blue eyes might never look at me again. Maybe I wouldn’t be by his side anymore.

That thought was unbearably sad.

So, stammering, I opened my mouth. I mustered courage. I couldn’t let this possibly last moment go to waste.

“The things announced by the Chelcia Empire… I didn’t do them. You may not believe it, but, no, Ldin, I didn’t.”

My legs gave out. I slumped down and looked up at the man in front of me.

His blue eyes stared at me without moving.

Those eyes, once filled with such kindness, now seemed devoid of any emotion.

My chest hurt so much.

“Well, you see… I was watching the grand duke and his child, and suddenly they vomited blood. I was so shocked and confused, and then I thought about the baby’s milk bottle and grabbed it, but people accused me of being the culprit.”

I spoke incoherently and laughed weakly.

“I’m just an empty shell with nothing. I have no way to get poison… If anyone thought for a moment, they would have known, but no one believed me.”

They criticized me as a princess with nowhere to go but didn’t realize the truth.

I was so foolish, but if I said it out loud, I felt like I would truly break.

I thought I had changed. I thought things were definitely different now, but was it all just my illusion? Once again, I felt utterly alone, standing isolated in this world.

Lonely.

No one understands.

I felt tears leak from one eye.

“And, I was locked in the attic, for a month, trapped, but…”

“Enough.”

Ldin cut me off sharply, and I lowered my head weakly.

Tears streamed down uncontrollably like something broken.

It was so hard. Or was it? I wasn’t sure. It felt like a thick wall was blocking my path to calm.

I gasped for breath, unable to steady myself.

Why am I like this, really.

“Should I leave the tower? It’s a shameless request, but… please, don’t send me back to the royal family. I’m… too exhausted…”

“Asila.”

I flinched but didn’t stop speaking. I knew he didn’t trust me, but still, I was a spirit mage.

“If I stay with the royal family, it’s just too hard—”

“Asila!!!”

Ldin’s shout was like a scream, and I slowly raised my head.

“No one believes that you did that. Really, no one. Everyone who knows you! Abella, Christina, Diarun, Kallios von Cantana, and even me. Not a single one of us has ever believed you would do such a thing.”

I stared at him blankly. His face was distorted with anguish as he looked at me.

Slowly, Ldin kneeled and lowered his body, then pulled me into a tight embrace.

“Even if you did, we are all on your side. We like you, and we fully trust you. Why, why would you even think that…”

I suddenly understood his words, and tears poured out of my eyes like a child.

Relief washed over my entire body.

I had tried so hard to erase the past, yet remnants of it followed me, choking me.

It forced me to remember things I didn’t want to recall.

I had never been this weak before. I had been holding on alone until now. Something built up inside me finally burst, and I rested my head against Ldin’s firm chest.

Just now. Just this once.

I wanted to lean on someone.

Click.

After Asila, who had been silently crying for a long time, finally fell asleep from exhaustion, Ldin carefully laid her on the bed and left the room.

“How is she?”

Outside the room stood Kallios, who had called Ldin to the west tower.

Kallios had noticed Asila’s abnormality ever since he told her about the baseless accusations the Chelcia Empire had made against the princess.

“She barely calmed down, but that’s not the problem.”

Kallios raised his eyebrows. His eyes widened when he spotted the potted plant in Ldin’s hand.

“…Why is that?”

Neovis.

At first glance, it looked like an ordinary purple flower, but it was a type of magical beast that amplifies emotions.

Because it didn’t interfere with spirit mages’ sensing, it usually grew deep in the mountains.

Ldin realized something was off when Asila was crying endlessly, seemingly broken.

It was strange.

When she entered the tower, her fragile demeanor had gradually faded. No matter how much her past haunted her, Asila was still Asila.

Then he found it. The potted plant emitting a faint light, cleverly hidden between the window frame and the curtains.

“…Who? Why?”

Ldin stared blankly at Kallios murmuring, lost in thought himself.

He wanted to punish the Chelcia Empire, the primary cause of Asila’s suffering, but now this was more urgent.

What profit could be gained by disturbing Asila’s emotions?

He and Kallios became concerned about Asila, and then…

Kallios’s expression suddenly changed.

“Hey, Lazerin. You need to go north immediately.”

Ldin looked up.

“Check if anything’s wrong there, then come back or not.”

Kallios, unusually serious, roughly ruffled his hair and said.

Ldin nodded, understanding what Kallios meant. Kallios seemed to think similarly.

If Asila’s state deteriorated, inevitably Ldin, Kallios, the tower master, and those close to her would all focus their attention on her.

And coincidentally, those close to Asila held important positions among the tower’s spirit mages.

Who knew what might happen while their eyes were elsewhere.

What was more serious was that the Neovis was inside the tower — in Asila’s very room.

That meant whoever orchestrated this knew exactly who Asila was close to.

No matter who the enemy was or their purpose to cause chaos, there was a traitor inside the Spirit Tower.