“What are you doing, you?”
It wasn’t a question.
Seongbin didn’t finish. He growled, holding back his rapid, gasping breath and his heart pounding like crazy.
Anger outweighed joy, and fear outweighed longing.
Zeon looked like someone from another world. His hair was cropped, his clothes were neat, and his silence was unfamiliar.
The absence of the past few days seemed to have completely changed her.
Strangely enough, Zion was calm.
She was like an actor about to go on stage, recalling only the lines she had practiced the entire way there.
She slowly pulled at the corners of her lips.
“How have you been?”
Seongbin strained his eyes. She had vanished without a trace and returned six days later, smiling. It was as if nothing had happened, despite the fact that she had turned his entire routine upside down.
Seongbin forcefully pushed up his eyelids, which felt rough as if they had sand stuck to them.
At first glance, Zion’s face was indescribable. The time she spent there must have been no different.
The past few days, during which she deliberately went into hiding, have been hell. Each day, anxiety has torn my heart apart.
“What the hell are you…. What the….”
A long sigh settled between the questions that were about to burst out all at once.
At that time, I couldn’t even utter a single word of the question I really wanted to ask.
“How was it?”
Seongbin’s angry eyebrows twitched at her somewhat unexpected question.
“How did you feel?”
“under!”
His suppressed anger burst out in a ragged breath. A spasm formed at the corners of his mouth. His gaze, which had been drifting for a moment, finally landed on Zion.
Like an actor waiting for the cue, holding her heart racing like crazy, her next line continued.
“This is what it’s like to be left behind. Without knowing why, you just sit there, numb, and endure it. There’s nothing you can do.”
“Explain it so I can understand what you mean!”
The setting sun poured in. Zion’s face, which had been expressionless, flushed red.
Seongbin opened his eyes wide and looked at her, as if the blushing Zion was about to disappear somewhere again.
She, too, met Seongbin’s gaze with unwavering steadfastness.
“We can’t do that.”
Her dry voice cut through the air.
Seongbin closed his cold eyes for a moment and then opened them.
“Is it because of my marriage story?”
A bitter smile appeared on Zion’s lips.
“No. It just reminded me that you are that kind of person.”
“what?”
“Still, thank you. Thanks to you, things are definitely sorted out.”
Seongbin let out a short breath.
“Is that all you can say? Thank you? Are you okay?”
His voice was softly laid down.
“Yeah. Thank you, sincerely. I almost forgot. What kind of person you are.”
“What about me?”
“You’re the kind of person who runs away when we’re at our best. First to England, then to marriage.”
Seongbin’s expression hardened.
I had guessed she would be shocked by the wedding news, but I never imagined she would take it this way.
Their gazes were tensely locked with each other.
“Did you really think I would get married like this?”
“It doesn’t matter, do it or not. Either way, the outcome will be the same. You’ll leave, and I’ll be left behind.”
Zion’s voice remained unwavering. He simply poured out the words he’d prepared, without hesitation, as if he were determined to finish his sentence.
Seongbin took a moment to catch his breath.
“So, this is your answer? Or rather, a punishment?”
There was a coolness in his voice as he poured out his words calmly.
“Think whatever you want.”
Her voice was even colder than his.
Seongbin pressed his temples against the sudden headache that came over him.
“But you should have at least asked. You should have given me a chance to explain something. You just disappeared like that…”
“You were only a few days old. I was five years old. For five whole years, I had to fight that damn memory you carved into me.”
The words I had prepared scattered in my head, and the words I had suppressed to protect my pride burst out.
“That’s not possible, we can’t. I’ll carry that memory with me until I die, and it’ll constantly make me anxious.”
Why did I cling so tightly to that little bit of pride? When I finally let it go, it was nothing special.
“I’ll always have to live in silence, because I don’t know when you’ll disappear again.”
I’m afraid you’ll leave, so I won’t keep you by my side. It’s more pathetic than telling you not to leave, but that’s my true feelings.
It’s that easy.
What is this?
“So this time… I’m going to abandon you.”
So, go when you send it.
Zion’s shoulders trembled slightly. He clenched his fists tightly, standing precariously as if he might collapse at any moment.
“…It was a punishment.”
Seongbin muttered as he looked at Zion, who was gasping for breath.
after-.
A long breath escaped Seongbin’s lips. A sigh mingled with his heart, unable to accept it at all.
He leaned back in his chair and took a deep breath.
“So, you’re really going to stop here?”
Seongbin asked.
Zion’s throat was locked, and he couldn’t easily answer. He was almost there, almost finished, but strangely, his tongue wouldn’t obey.
Unable to even nod, Zion simply strained his eyes and glared at him.
“Yeah. That’s what you want.”
Seongbin muttered, as if talking to himself. His voice was muffled by the suffocating tension.
“I will gladly accept that punishment.”
It was around the time when Zion’s eyes, which had been wet, were starting to dry up.
“If you want to throw it away, throw it away. If you want to run away, run away. I won’t stop you. Do whatever you want.”
It was the moment she had been preparing for, and even though she had gotten the answer she wanted, her heart, which had been beating uncontrollably, suddenly sank.
I thought it was finally over…
“It’s all okay. This time, I’ll be the one hanging on.”
Seongbin smiled comfortably, as if he had put everything down.
“I have no pride towards you anymore.”
One day, the two of them put aside their pride for the first time.
She said goodbye, and he said the beginning.
