Episode 39
When the word “idiot” came out of Emilia’s mouth, Edwin honestly thought he’d misheard.
She wasn’t the type to say something like that or so he’d always believed.
But right now, she was dead serious, her anger written all over her face.
And she was angry. From her point of view, what he’d said wasn’t even a bad joke it was just insulting.
“Emilia.”
“Go on, tell me. What kind of rumors were going around while I was gone that could make you doubt me like this?”
Normally, Emilia didn’t pay attention to gossip. She knew it wasn’t good for her peace of mind.
There were always more bad rumors than good ones, and bad news could eat away at you; she’d learned that all too
well in the Hermann family.
So she’d done her best to ignore it and protect herself from getting hurt. But after marrying Edwin, her thinking had
changed.
She didn’t want to cause him trouble.
So instead of avoiding rumors, she started actively listening for them.
If it was just about her, she’d let it slide. But if it was something that could damage Edwin, she did everything she
could squash it.
That’s why being suspected by him right now felt absurd.
Before she left the capital, the only gossip about her and the royals was that they couldn’t stand each other—not that
she was in some shady “relationship” worth questioning.
“You do know I’ve been nothing but deferential to the royals all this time because your family’s pro-Emperor, right?”
“That’s not what I’m asking.”
“Then say what it is. I have no idea why you’re even doubting me right now.”
Her voice was colder than he’d ever heard it. She wasn’t mad about being linked to a prince, she was furious about
being suspected of having feelings for someone she’d never even liked.
Edwin couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something off in her reaction.
He’d thought that if he mentioned a prince, she’d understand and give him an answer. But she seemed to be gritting
her teeth at the idea of the royals in general.
He remembered well enough what her dealings with the royal family had been like in the capital. But still… he wanted
to ask.
“You weren’t involved with Prince Leoqus at all?”
It was the kind of thing he could’ve let go, but he couldn’t. He needed to hear from her own mouth that she hadn’t
been living happily with another man while forgetting him.
So he asked again this time using the name outright.
“Leo…qus?”
She froze. She wasn’t completely unfamiliar with the name back in the capital, she’d memorized all the royals’
names just to make sure she never slipped up.
But she’d never had much to do with him, and over time, she’d basically forgotten he existed.
She’d spent most of her time avoiding people’s eyes, and Leoqus rarely showed up anywhere she wasn’t welcome—
meaning their chances of meeting had been slim to none.
Then it clicked for her. Her head spun a little from the realization.
“Wait… Leo… as in Leoqus?”
“So you really didn’t know.”
For a second, Edwin’s expression softened.
If she hadn’t even known Leo’s real identity, then maybe their relationship wasn’t close after all.
But the conversation wasn’t over. She still looked stiff.
“And how exactly is that a reason to suspect me?”
She didn’t care that he was a prince. She appreciated the help Leo had given her, sure but being suspected at all still
pissed her off. That wasn’t going to change just because she now knew who he really was.
Of course, she was a little surprised—until this moment, she’d thought Leo was just a young detective from
Cardinald.
“I’ve already told you.”
That you’re like light to me.
A warm light.
A place I want to be and, for that reason, a place I can’t easily approach.
Hearing her words helped Edwin pull himself back from the edge a little.
Ever since finding her again, he’d been restless, on edge, and reacting too sharply to anything involving her.
Now he realized he’d gone too far.
And before he could stop himself, he sank to his knees.
The Duke of the Empire, kneeling it almost never happened, not even before the Emperor. Emilia was so shocked
she dropped down to her knees too.
“Edwin… are you okay?”
She thought maybe he was in pain. The Edwin she knew wasn’t the type to kneel so easily in front of someone.
But physically, he was fine. It was the inside that was a mess.
“You’re my light too.”
She just stared at him silently as he spoke.
Tears were running down his face.
It hurt to see him like that. She wanted to look away from his vulnerability—but she didn’t. She met his eyes and
stayed there.
And while he was grateful just for this moment, he also felt guilty for suspecting her.
If she wanted to walk away from him, he had no right to stop her. So why was his heart so selfish?
He wanted her to know exactly what was in his heart. Just like when they’d first met when she’d shown herself to
him without hiding anything.
“How could I ever be light to you?” she asked softly.
She knew how people saw her—there was no way she could be some shining figure to anyone.
But Edwin’s answer was firm.
“You have no idea how hard I searched for you.”
“Edwin…”
She gently took his arm. His tears still hadn’t stopped.
“The day you disappeared, I couldn’t see anything anymore.”
He couldn’t hear, couldn’t see it was like someone had stolen all the light from his world in an instant. Everything
had turned cold and dark.
It felt unreal, like a nightmare he wanted to wake up from only it was too hellish even for that.
He would’ve gladly gone to hell if it meant he could get her back. That’s how desperately he’d searched for his light
again.
And just when he was about to give up hope, he’d finally found her.
The light standing right in front of him now.
“Did you think of me as a weakness?” she asked.
“Yes. You were the biggest weakness I had.”
The word weakness almost made her laugh, but at the same time, it made her feel strangely happy. It confirmed how
much she mattered to him.
If he’d told her that back then, she might have stayed in that mansion and endured everything no matter if it was a
lie or if he eventually left her for Diana.
She would’ve believed him like a fool.
“And now?”
“Not anymore.”
“Then what am I to you now?”
His tears stopped.
Seeing that, Emilia smiled. The tension in the air dissolved like snow in sunlight—suddenly, it felt like spring.
“Emilia, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m just as full of regret toward you.”
“What could you possibly have to be sorry for?”
He’d only ever wanted to protect her—never realizing his actions would hurt her even more.
But ignorance wasn’t an excuse, and he knew it. The guilt was crushing. He hated that all he could do was say I’m
sorry and please forgive me.
Still, he wanted her forgiveness.
He wanted to start over with her.
And the truth was, she’d already tried to forgive him more than once.
For someone he thought was all ice, her heart was warmer than most.
She had every reason to hate him enough to want to kill him but here she was, ready to let it go.
He wanted to begin again with her.
From this very moment, before anyone else could interfere.
