Chapter 90
Yulia gazed quietly at him, waiting for his response.
Only then did Fernan lower his gaze and, instead of answering, he pulled her hand towards him.
When he wrapped his arms around her fragile shoulders, Yuliaâs body pressed fully against his.
With wide eyes, Yulia froze for a moment, but then, slowly following his lead, she raised her hand.
She wrapped her slender arm around his firm waist, awkwardly pulling him closer.
For some reason, she felt her ears growing warmer.
To hide her reddened face, Yulia gently buried it in his chest, thinking that this was the answer she had been waiting for.
In that moment, a cool breeze brushed by, passing through them.
A large hand carefully swept her disheveled hair away, as if the wind had tousled it.
Feeling his touch, Yulia subtly tilted her face towards him.
The anxiety that had once filled her heart began to fade little by little as she rested in his embrace.
Cedric watched from across the window as the two of them walked together from a distance.
As was fitting for the noble couple of the castle, the servants lined up and bowed deeply when they entered the gate.
Yulia, still unable to remember anything, had been spending time with the Duke lately.
Cedric couldnât help but notice their intertwined hands as they walked.
Unconsciously clenching his fist, Cedric only relaxed when they disappeared through the entrance.
Watching them from afar always brought a bitter feeling, deeper than he had expected.
There were times when he felt like an unwelcome guest in this place.
ââŠAn unwelcome guest.â
It might be true. The way he was looking at Yulia now, it was something that wouldnât sit well with âthe current Yulia.â
He had decided to wait until her memories returned, but she still hadnât remembered anything.
Endless waiting⊠Was it always this difficult?
ââŠSigh.â
Cedric could feel the ugly emotions building up inside of him.
He shouldnât be jealous of the Duke. But he couldnât help but feel uneasy, wondering what he would do if Yulia never remembered.
On the other hand, a part of him even wondered if it might be better for Yulia to stay here, as it seemed like the best choice for her.
After staring at the empty castle gates for a long time, Cedric turned away.
He walked down the corridor, stopping briefly at the stairs.
Yuliaâs room was on the floor below.
Whenever Calrosa visited her, Cedric would sometimes accompany him as support.
He hadnât yet met Yulia alone. He hadnât had a long conversation with her either.
At least once, he wanted to talk to her alone, without anyone else present.
With this decision in mind, Cedric descended the stairs.
When he reached the floor where her room was located, he walked down the corridor and stopped near her door.
âMay I speak with Lady Yulia for a moment?â
Cedric asked the maid standing near her room.
The maid, recognizing that he was a guest at the castle, bowed her head and answered.
âAre you here for treatment? I will let her know immediately.â
Thinking he had come for treatment, the maid went inside without hesitation.
Soon, permission to enter was granted.
Cedric stepped cautiously into the room, and as always when she received treatment, Yulia was sitting at the table.
âWelcome, Priest.â
Unlike when he had seen her from the window earlier, she had tied her hair up in a single knot.
Seeing her like this reminded him of their time in the monastery.
Back then, she always tied her hair loosely in a simple knot.
Cedric liked watching her hair fluttering as it hung loosely down her back.
âPriest?â
When Cedric remained silent and motionless, Yulia looked at him in confusion.
Finally snapping out of his trance, he let out a small sound.
ââŠMy apologies. I was lost in thought for a moment.â
Cedric slowly approached the table and sat down.
She tilted her head slightly, gazing at him with curiosity.
âYou didnât come with Priest Calrosa today?â
ââŠActually, I came here because I have something to say to you, not for treatment.â
Yulia looked at him with a quiet expression, her curiosity piqued.
Cedric studied her face for a moment.
Her face, once pale and near death during her long illness, was now much healthier, her complexion glowing with vitality.
In fact, Yulia seemed more comfortable and happy now than when she had stayed in the monastery.
âHow is Lady YuliaâŠ?â
Before Cedric could say more, the door suddenly burst open.
Both he and Yulia turned their faces toward the door.
âYour Grace.â
Standing in the doorway was the Duke, his brow furrowed slightly.
Behind him stood the maid, suggesting that the Duke had opened the door after realizing Cedric had come alone.
Yulia greeted him warmly as he approached.
âI know today isnât your treatment day.â
Unlike his furrowed brow, his voice was soft and calm.
Although his gaze was on Yulia, his words were directed at Cedric.
ââŠYes, I came here because I have something to tell Lady Yulia.â
But now that the Duke was here, Cedric knew there would be no further chance for conversation.
Like Cedric, the Duke would not want them alone together.
Cedric briefly glanced at the Duke, then turned his gaze to Yulia.
She was looking at the Duke with a smile, far brighter than when she had looked at Cedric.
Watching her, Cedric slowly clenched his hands in his lap.
Then, releasing the tension, he pressed his lips tightly together.
âSince Your Grace has arrived, I will speak with Lady Yulia another time.â
âSpeak now. In front of me.â
The Dukeâs tone had changed, slightly colder, as if to make it clear that he would not allow them to meet alone.
Sensing the change in atmosphere, Yulia widened her eyes in surprise as she looked at the Duke.
Seeing that further resistance would only make her more uncomfortable, Cedric stood up slowly.
Facing the Duke squarely, his expression hard, he spoke firmly.
âI will come back another time.â
With those words, Cedric bowed his head to both of them.
After a brief nod, he quickly left the room.
The door closed with a soft thud, leaving a brief silence in the room.
âYour Grace?â
Yulia asked, looking at Fernan with a puzzled expression, as he stood there looking like he was holding something back.
Only then did Fernan turn his gaze back to her, his expression softening as if nothing had happened.
âPerhaps⊠you donât want me to meet with Priest Cedric alone?â
Unexpectedly, Yuliaâs words hit the mark. Fernan looked at her for a moment and then muttered softly.
ââŠYes.â
His voice lowered, almost inaudible.
âIf you want to meet him, I wonât stop you. ButâŠâ
Yulia felt something uneasy about Fernanâs appearance at that moment.
It wasnât just because of the priest earlier; it seemed like there was another reason.
Slowly standing, Yulia approached him, gazing up at him with concern.
âDonât make that face.â
Seeing him look uneasy made her feel uneasy too.
She had always thought she was the one anxious about this dreamlike time ending, but now, it seemed he was the one feeling it more.
She lightly touched his firm hand, lifting her lips into a small smile.
âLetâs stay together.â
ââŠ.â
âI want to stay with you. Always.â
Fernan, taken by surprise at her words, blinked, his eyes widening.
He then tightened his grip on her hand, holding it firmly.
âI feel the same way.â
He wanted to stay with her, more than anything. The longing in his heart was stronger than anything else.
With all his heavy emotions bottled up, Fernan held on tight.
He didnât want to let go of Yulia. He wanted her to forget everything, to stay by his side forever.
Fernan slowly loosened his grip, holding her gently enough not to hurt her.
âIâll stay with you. Always.â
Finally, Yulia relaxed and smiled, nodding her head in agreement.
âContinue being with me, always.â
Yulia finally smiled more comfortably, nodding her head.
In that moment, a sense of warmth and peace seemed to settle between them, a quiet understanding and connection, without the need for further words.
They remained in the embrace, a steady rhythm to their shared breathing, a silent promise to face whatever was ahead, together.
But even with this mutual comfort, an undercurrent of tension still lingered in the air. Yulia couldnât quite shake off the feeling that something, someone, was silently watching from the shadows. She chose to ignore it for now, holding onto the peace they had found in each otherâs company.
For now, that was enough.
âLetâs stay like this, just for a little longer,â she whispered, as if afraid that the moment might slip away.
Feranâs grip tightened slightly, his emotions caught between the intensity of their connection and the fear of losing this fragile moment.
âAlways,â he replied softly, his voice filled with more unspoken promises.
And in that moment, it felt like time itself had slowed down, the world outside their little space forgotten, as if it was just the two of them, holding onto each other in the silence.
They stood there, wrapped in each otherâs presence, the quiet surrounding them a stark contrast to the storm of emotions swirling inside.
Yulia, with her head resting against Feranâs chest, closed her eyes for a moment. She let the steady beat of his heart soothe the restlessness that had been building within her for so long.
Feran, on the other hand, was deep in thought. The overwhelming feelings that had gripped him only moments ago had not entirely subsided.
He was afraidâafraid of losing her, afraid of the unknown future that loomed ahead of them. But most of all, he was afraid of the truth she still had yet to discover.
His hand gently stroked the back of her head, his thoughts focused on the uncertainty of everything around them. How long could they keep pretending that nothing was wrong?
How long could they live in this bubble, unaware of the dangers lying in wait outside?
He wasnât sure. But he knew one thingâhe would do anything to keep her safe, to keep her by his side.
âYulia,â he whispered, pulling away just slightly so he could look at her face.
âAre you really alright? Youâve been so quiet latelyâŠâ
Yulia opened her eyes and met his gaze. For a brief moment, her expression softened.
âIâm alright⊠Itâs justâŠâ
She hesitated, unsure of how to put her feelings into words.
âEverything feels so⊠different. I donât know how to explain it.â
Feran searched her eyes, sensing the unease beneath her calm exterior.
âYou donât have to explain it to me right now. Just know that Iâm here, for whatever you need.â
She smiled faintly, appreciating his reassuring words.
âThank you,â
she whispered, her voice barely above a breath.
The silence between them stretched on, both of them lost in their own thoughts, yet connected in a way that words couldnât fully capture. The outside world felt distant, almost irrelevant in that moment.
But they both knew that the peace they shared now wouldnât last forever. Their pasts, their struggles, and the uncertain future that awaited them would eventually break through, testing their bond in ways they couldnât predict.
For now, though, they allowed themselves to live in this fragile moment, hoping that whatever lay ahead, they could face it together.
And as they stood there, the room still and quiet around them, the weight of the world seemed just a little bit lighter, as if, for a brief moment, they had managed to escape it.
As the minutes passed, Yulia and Feran remained in each otherâs embrace, both silently aware of the world that would soon demand their attention.
It was a bittersweet understandingâthat no matter how much they wished for this moment to last forever, they could not keep the tides of fate at bay.
The pressure of their roles, their families, and the uncertainties that loomed over them were not things they could easily escape.
Feranâs hand gently cupped her cheek, his thumb brushing softly over her skin.
The touch was both tender and possessive, as though he were silently claiming her as his own, but also trying to reassure her, to remind her that she wasnât alone in this storm.
Yulia looked up at him, her gaze unwavering, her heart a swirling mixture of emotions.
The truth of her feelings had become clear to her over timeâshe had grown deeply attached to him, in a way she hadnât expected. But with that attachment came fear.
Fear of the inevitable end, of what they could never have, of the future that seemed to slip through her fingers like sand.
âWhat happens now?â she asked, her voice filled with an unspoken heaviness.
Feranâs jaw tightened, a flicker of unease crossing his features.
He had hoped she wouldnât ask, not yet.
But the question had always been there, hanging between them like a stormcloud.
âI donât know,â he admitted softly. âBut I do know that whatever happens, I want you with me.â
Yulia swallowed hard, her emotions threatening to spill over.
She wanted to believe him, to trust in those words, but her heart was heavy with doubt.
They were both walking on a fragile path, one that could shatter at any moment.
âI want that too,â she said, her voice barely a whisper.
âBut Iâm not sure weâre strong enough for whatâs ahead.â
Feranâs grip on her tightened, as though he could hold back all the uncertainty that threatened to tear them apart.
âWeâll be strong enough. Together.â
For a moment, they just stood there, the air around them thick with emotion.
The world outside continued, indifferent to the quiet struggle taking place within the walls of the room.
The storm still raged within their hearts, but for now, they could find solace in each other.
But as the last remnants of the peaceful moment began to fade, the weight of the outside world crept back in.
The sound of distant footsteps echoed down the hall, a reminder that their time together was limited, that reality was closing in on them once again.
Yulia pulled back just slightly, her gaze never leaving Feranâs.
âWhat should we do now?â she asked, her voice steady despite the turmoil inside her.
Feran took a deep breath, his eyes hardening with resolve.
âWe prepare. We face whatever comes our way, and we protect whatâs ours.â
She nodded slowly, the determination in her own eyes matching his.
They both knew the challenges ahead would not be easy, but there was a strength in their shared resolve, a bond forged in the fires of their struggles.
Together, they would face the futureâwhatever it held.
And as they turned to walk back into the uncertainty of the world outside, they did so with the unspoken promise that no matter how difficult the journey, they would never face it alone.
