Episode 13
Alicia woke up in her familiar bedroom—
But bright moonlight, almost like daylight, lit up a terrifying scene.
Anes and Howard were lying on the floor, cut down by a sword.
And then—flash!—a bolt of lightning lit Kaien’s face.
Blood splattered across his cheek, and his eyes were full of madness.
“You dared to deceive me… death would be mercy.”
Kaien walked toward Alicia slowly, sword in hand.
The killing intent in his black eyes froze her in place. She couldn’t even run.
“So, Empress… what punishment do you deserve?”
Her lips trembled, but no answer came out.
Kaien seemed to take her silence as an answer.
He raised his sword high—
Alicia squeezed her eyes shut.
“—Hhh… haah…!”
Alicia jolted awake.
Her body was drenched in sweat, her breathing rough.
She quickly looked at her hands and around the room—
no blood, no bodies. It had only been a nightmare.
“Yes… That’s who he is.”
Kaien was still a proud predator, a man with no mercy.
Just because he had shown a slightly softer side didn’t mean he had truly changed.
“I was too careless…”
This entire palace existed for Kaien alone.
Even the Empress was no exception.
That meant she couldn’t just quit whenever she wanted.
“There’s no way he would simply allow… a divorce.”
If she said the wrong thing, Kaien’s anger could mean death—not only for her, but for the maids in her palace too.
She couldn’t stand the thought of them dying because of her.
“Your Majesty…”
A soft knock.
Anes entered carefully, and her eyes went wide when she saw Alicia drenched in sweat.
“Are you unwell?”
Anes wiped Alicia’s forehead with a cloth, worry clear on her face.
Alicia looked at her and thought: she couldn’t let such a kind woman die because of her selfishness.
“It’s nothing… just a nightmare.”
“What kind of nightmare makes you sweat like this?”
Alicia couldn’t bring herself to say it aloud. She just shook her head.
Anes poured her some water, and after such a nightmare, it tasted like sweet honey.
“Anes.”
“Yes, Your Majesty?”
Alicia drank another sip and spoke seriously:
“That plan we discussed—finding a way to contact the Kingdom of Tristan in secret… forget about it for now.”
Anes looked surprised, but seeing how serious Alicia was, she only nodded.
“And like I told you before… everyone here must be careful. Especially when His Majesty’s eyes are on us.”
In the past, Kaien never cared about the Empress’s palace.
Even if there was surveillance, she didn’t care—he wasn’t interested.
One dinner, one tea time—she had thought nothing of it because she believed they would soon go their separate ways.
…But now, what if his interest continued? What if his mood kept changing?
“Your Majesty, you don’t need to worry about us maids.”
“No. You all heard him last night. He said if something happened to me again, he’d punish the maids.”
“He only said that out of concern for you.”
Alicia slowly shook her head.
“He meant it.”
Anes didn’t argue. She had heard that cold, deadly voice, too.
“I still remember the day His Majesty returned and I went to greet him…
There was mud and someone’s blood on his boots.
And that sharp smell of iron.”
He carried the smell of killing with him.
And Alicia knew—whoever the target was, if Kaien wanted to cut them down, he would do it without hesitation.
“It’s never bad to be careful,” Anes said gently. “His Majesty will leave for Lubeo soon. Until then, we’ll be cautious.”
“Yes…” Alicia replied.
“Try to get some more sleep, Your Majesty. The night is still long.”
Alicia nodded, and Anes bowed and left.
But Alicia knew she wouldn’t sleep again.
She didn’t want to risk dreaming that nightmare again.
“I need to think. I can’t just drift along.”
Alicia hugged her knees and whispered to herself.
This was her second life as Alicia.
When she first died in the modern world and woke up as Alicia in the novel, she had been so overwhelmed that she did nothing but try to adapt day by day.
She didn’t know proper manners, didn’t even greet people properly.
People thought she was crazy.
Kaien ignored her even more because of it.
“When you leave your life choices to others, you’re bound to be unhappy.”
In her last life, Alicia had clung to Lukan.
She thought, Better to rely on my family than a husband I barely see.
Because of that, she only parroted Lukan’s words and barely survived in the palace, while Kaien ignored her completely.
Even until the moment she died.
“Every result comes from a cause.”
In her last life, she thought just being Empress meant she’d eventually get close to Kaien and find happiness.
But her life was real, not a fairy tale.
Love and happiness don’t come so easily.
“Kaien changed because… I changed.”
He always mocked Alicia for repeating Lukan’s teachings like a parrot.
But in this life, she had thrown away Lukan’s influence—and Kaien’s attitude changed.
But that wasn’t the only reason.
It made her easier to be around, but it wasn’t enough to make him seek her out.
Then she remembered Miller’s report:
His Majesty was very pleased with the luncheon…
The luncheon Kaien had specifically asked the Empress’s palace to prepare.
Howard, the Empress’s chief attendant, had personally served him—just like that dinner before.
“My little act worked… even better than I expected.”
Whether that was good or bad, she didn’t know.
But one thing was certain: she had drawn Kaien’s attention far more than planned.
“Time going back doesn’t mean a person changes on their own.”
Kaien had changed because Alicia had changed.
And she now understood something about him:
If you do something to provoke him, there will always be a result.
But she also knew—one careless word, one wrong move, and his sword could cut her down.
“Is this… what it feels like to try taming a wild beast?”
She thought of those TV shows from her first life—trainers taming animals that were thought impossible to control.
Even a doctor guiding troubled children.
“So… it’s possible with people too.”
It sounded crazy, but what if she could tame Kaien, even a little?
She had already made small progress.
She had proof he could learn.
“It’s not impossible. No one else has tried, that’s all.”
Alicia squeezed her knees tightly, determination growing.
If this were her first life as Alicia, she would have given up and just adapted.
But she refused to live a meaningless life again.
If she had to live like that for ten more years, she’d rather die by Kaien’s sword.
“I can do it. No… only I can do it.”
She was the only Empress.
She could use her “memory loss” as an excuse.
And unlike others, she had no fear of risking her life—because she was willing to.
“There are things worth testing.”
Simple dining manners had already changed Kaien.
Luckily, Alicia knew no one in this world could imagine:
How to train dogs, how to comfort hurt children—small lessons from her past life.
“More like training a dangerous dog… than raising a child.”
Kaien was a predator.
To train him, she needed methods for taming a vicious dog.
Her first success had been the dining manners.
Like someone once said, there’s no such thing as a bad dog.
Starting with eating habits was the right choice.
“I need to find ways to try… very carefully… without him noticing.”
The fear in her heart faded.
Her mind was now full of plans—how to handle Kaien.
Because she knew better than anyone:
If the Emperor’s will is against her, her life has no hope.
“If I can’t be his friend… then at least close enough that he’d let me leave the palace.”
Kaien didn’t stay in the capital anyway.
In her past life, even as she died, he didn’t return from Lubeo.
So an Empress could leave the palace—if she played it right.
“Alright…”
She didn’t want to live powerless and waste away again.
“I’ll do it. I have to try.”
In the deep night, Alicia made a bold, dangerous decision she could tell no one.
Even to herself, it felt daring and reckless—but her mind was set.
