Chapter 44
“Huff….”
When I opened my eyes again, I couldn’t move properly.
I had seen that thing… and I forgot how to breathe. I didn’t even realize I stopped breathing before I lost consciousness.
Lying on the ground, I gasped and clutched my throat.
I couldn’t remember how to breathe. That image of the dark creature rising from the deep sea was burned into my mind like a black hole.
“Haaah…”
“Izana, are you having trouble breathing?”
A calm voice gently lifted me up. A beautiful, pale face came into view. It was winter.
Seeing someone I recognized made me feel a bit better. I nodded quickly.
Winter then calmly covered my mouth and nose with his hand.
What is he doing?!
His hand was cold—so cold it felt like my throat was being squeezed tighter.
I struggled with all my strength and finally broke free from his grip.
“Haa… haah… Are you crazy?!”
I panted as I stepped back.
Winter calmly lowered his hand and said,
“You know a lot about me, but it seems that was your first time meeting that.”
“Haa… Haa… Huh? I… I can breathe again…”
Air flowed into my lungs. I focused only on breathing.
It was strange—the air shouldn’t have a taste, but it felt delicious.
“Izana, remember this. That thing hasn’t actually done anything to us yet. Don’t forget.”
Winter gently helped me stand up.
“No matter how scary it looks, it is still the god who created us. You just forgot everything else for a moment because of the overwhelming fear. Next time, it will be different.”
My vision slowly cleared. I looked up at Winter with wide eyes.
“That… That was Fuehrion? Why did Fuehrion suddenly wake up?”
“To be exact, it was the evil god Abilisk.”
Winter didn’t look surprised at all.
“Abilisk’s seal was meant to break one day on its own. But even before that, someone could break it with enough force. I think we triggered it with the underwater volcano. We’ll need another plan.”
I put my hands over my chest and asked with a trembling voice,
“How did you defeat it?”
Winter gave me a small smile.
But I couldn’t smile. Not even jokingly.
That thing wasn’t something anyone could fight.
I shivered as the image of the black abyss returned.
Winter sat me down in a chair.
…Wait, a chair?
I looked around. Winter had just sat in the chair across from me.
I touched the familiar furniture and said,
“Winter, isn’t this the Rohia Castle?”
“Yes. This is where we first met.”
“Why are we here?”
It was the place where Winter once killed me. My room.
I felt confused.
I had always thought that when I died, I’d return to the moment just before I died. But now I had died in Elahi… and I was back in the castle?
And another thing—
“When did you die again?”
At my question, Winter, who had been pouring tea from a pot, looked up.
“I followed you right after you died. I wanted to see if it would work this way. And it seems it did.”
“Wait… You mean you killed yourself?”
I stared at Winter as he pushed aside the orange juice he had poured.
So… he took his own life. Even though he hated doing that.
I sighed and picked up the juice Winter didn’t want. I drank it all in one go.
“…Ahh.”
The sweet taste helped calm my shocked body. Finally, I could think straight again.
“I need to figure out exactly how my return works. Why didn’t I come back to the moment just before I died?”
Winter refilled my cup and said,
“You’re not wrong. We came back to the moment just before I killed you. So maybe that’s the point we return to.”
He had a point. But why that moment?
“Let’s think about how your death in Elahi was different from the one here.”
I thought hard.
When Winter Killed Me… I was scared. I knew I was about to die.
But in Elahi… I didn’t even realize I was dying. I just closed my eyes and woke up here.
“…Maybe that’s it?”
Winter looked at me.
I gently tapped my teacup.
Winter, me, and this world… It all reminded me of something.
A save point.
My death worked like a game’s save point. And Winter’s death? Like pressing the reset button.
“When I died in Elahi, I didn’t know I was dying. That’s the biggest difference.”
So I died without pressing the save button—like turning off a game in the forest before saving.
‘Only difference is there’s no talking mole to nag me about it.’
To prove this theory, I had one more thing to test.
“Winter, what would happen if you died right now, alone?”
If I really was the save point, then time should return to this exact moment.
Winter answered without hesitation.
“Shall we try it?”
“No, no!!”
I shouted in panic.
If I was wrong, and Winter’s solo death sent him alone 15 years back in time…
“Then I’ll be born again in Rohia with no memories. I can’t let that happen.”
“Izana, I’ve forgotten and thrown away many memories to survive all these years,”
Winter said softly.
“But I’ll never forget you. If I return to the beginning, I promise I’ll take you from Rohia as soon as you’re born.”
If he had truly gone back thousands of times and never met me before this, that meant…
I had never survived long enough for us to meet—until now.
I finally reached this point after countless failures I couldn’t even remember.
If we reset again, who knows what might kill me next?
And most of all…
I don’t want this version of me to disappear.
I stood up with determination and walked to a drawer.
Opening the second drawer, I found a small, plain box among my clothes.
I gently ran my hand over it.
“Duke, I know more about you than you think.”
“I’ve wondered about that. Maybe it’s because you’re [Materia]?”
Yeah. Even if the story had gone off course, I still knew him well.
Even if his pain was deeper than I imagined.
“I know that you’re crazy.”
“You’ve heard the rumors, I see.”
“No. That’s not what I meant.”
Even so, I still believe he’s a hero.
I slowly opened the lid of the box.
“You were crazy from the very beginning.”
During the Elahi plague, he was only 15.
And he died dozens—maybe hundreds—of times trying to find a way to save everyone on the coastline.
Not just Elahi. The entire continent’s coastline.
All of that at just fifteen years old. He died over and over again for a future that seemed impossible.
‘At the end of the original story, he was just happy that he could finally die for real.’
After reading that ending, I was sure he took his own life soon after.
No one who lived like that could just go live a normal, happy life.
His kindness bordered on obsession. I called it madness.
Heroes don’t go crazy—they’re already crazy to begin with.
Winter Orsheus wasn’t someone who lost his mind.
He had always been like that.
“Raglia, restrain him.”
Because I believe… Even now, he’s still a hero who’s willing to die if it means saving everyone.
