Became a stagnant person in a squalid prison cell

Chapter 40 —

Hmm.

“These days, there seems to be trouble among the prisoners on the upper floors of the tower.”

“Really?”

“Yes. It’s not common for so many people to die outside the tower.”

Thinking back to what Sergeant Steven had said, it seemed like something suspicious was happening on the upper floors—something even the warden wasn’t talking about.

I slowly opened my eyes.

‘Well, it’s none of my business anymore.’

I couldn’t say I had no bonds here, but everyone would take care of themselves.

They all called me “Captain,” but honestly, I was just a leader in name. I hadn’t done much.

No one would miss me. And if someone did, they’d forget soon enough.

Just like how I was slowly forgetting those who had died here.

“Yaaawn.”

I was sleepy.

Maybe because I’d been thinking too much for the first time in a while.

It’s best to live life without thinking too hard.

“……”

I turned my head and saw Helios staring at me.

It was breakfast time.

Somehow, his tray was already empty. He sure eats well.

You need to eat whenever you can here.

‘If your stomach gets upset from the tower’s trials, throwing up is nothing.’

And that’s not all. Prisoners fight, and if you get unlucky, you might end up starving in solitary.

“What were you thinking about so deeply?” Helios frowned a bit.

Not long ago, he used to stiffen like a wooden doll if I got too close. But now, that reaction had faded a lot.

‘I still don’t know why he was like that, though.’

I rested my chin on my hand and tilted my head.

Some things hadn’t changed.

If I stared at him silently for long enough, Helios would look away.

Always shyly.

“Are you in puberty or something?”

“What?”

“You always turn your head when you see me. Are you writing a secret diary in your room or something?”

“What nonsense are you spouting?”

His handsome face scrunched up—but he still looked good.

“Then why do you look away?”

“I’ve just… been thinking a lot lately.”

“About what?”

“You live so simply. Must be nice.”

Hey, did he just throw shade at me?

I replied with a blank face, “Really?”

Helios let out a sigh with a complicated look.

“I’ve been thinking about the ability you showed on the 29th floor. Whenever I remember it, I realize how far behind I still am.”

There was still a gap of at least three levels between Helios and me.

The more you know, the more you see the difference—that’s probably what he was feeling.

I expected this.

‘Though it came a bit faster than I thought.’

When I didn’t respond, Helios lowered his head with a troubled face.

His slumped shoulders made me curious.

‘Why does he look so down?’

I reached out and gently lifted his chin.

“…What are you doing?”

“Why are you looking so defeated?”

Helios looked at me, confused.

“Who said I was defeated…”

Yeah, right. Even his voice sounded weak.

He tried to knock my hand away, but of course, my hand didn’t budge.

His eyebrow twitched.

“Let go.”

“Your eyes are droopy, your cute mouth is droopy, and your shoulders too.”

“…You’re not planning to let go, are you?”

“Don’t be discouraged. I’ve been taking such good care of you—why lose confidence?”

From the 30th floor and up, you enter the top rank among low-level prisoners.

Every time I heard about ranking, I couldn’t help but think of beef or pork cuts.

But Helios was already beyond others in his class.

Hadn’t he already beaten a mid-level prisoner in the hallway?

‘I was actually kind of proud then.’

Maybe this is what it feels like to raise a newbie.

Even if my goal is to be released, small moments of pride like this weren’t bad.

It had been a long time since I felt anything like that in this prison.

‘With all that talent, he really shouldn’t feel down.’

He absorbed knowledge like a sponge.

I hadn’t told him how talented he was because I figured it wouldn’t help to know.

Despite his playful appearance, he had the heart of a serious, justice-loving hero.

He didn’t fit this prison.

But people adapt. Eventually, he’d learn to find the right balance and survive.

‘If only he were a proud jerk, it’d be easier for him.’

He was the kind of person you’d never find in this place, and that’s what made him special.

The lower you are, the more you admire what’s above.

‘Of course, some people would just feel inferior around someone like him.’

I felt his warmth on my wrist.

“…How long are you going to hold me like this?”

He sounded annoyed.

Sure enough, his eyes were rebellious.

He couldn’t break free by force, so he was holding it in—but one wrong move and he’d lash out like a furious dog.

“I raised you this well, and now you’ve lost your confidence? That’s disappointing for your teacher.”

“I’ve always wanted to ask: Isn’t it embarrassing to talk about yourself in third person?”

Honestly, I preferred him getting angry over being moody. It felt more energetic.

I replied with a straight face:

“Teacher doesn’t care about things like that~”

“…You’ve gone crazy.”

Taking advantage of the moment, Helios finally knocked my hand away with a “thwack.”

“What’s bothering you so much? You’re not going to die.”

The dining hall was noisy.

Some prisoners looked our way, but most were focused on their own meals.

Helios spoke with a complicated look.

“Why?”

“…”

“Because you’re going to protect me?”

His soft purple eyes stared right through me.

I didn’t think I said anything to make him mad, but—

“Nope. You have to survive on your own.”

“…Then why.”

“Hm?”

“Never mind.”

Helios stood up.

His cheek, as he turned away, was bright red.

‘He’s sulking again.’

The fact that he still picked up his tray is what made me think of him as a noble or a hero inside.

‘If it were me, I would’ve told someone else to clean it and run off.’

He always did the right thing.

And people who are too upright tend to break easily.

I followed him out of the cafeteria. We met again just outside.

Helios asked, puzzled, “What about your tray?”

“It’s on the table.”

“Why didn’t you clean up?”

“Good question.”

“….”

Oof, he’s judging me. I smirked.

“Come here,” I said, pulling him closer by the shoulder.

I grabbed his head and gently ruffled his hair.

“Don’t die. Go all the way up—to the very top.”

“…”

“I can’t protect you, but I can help you not die.”

Our eyes met.

His pale face slowly turned red again. I didn’t know why he kept getting so heated.

“…How is that any different from protecting me?”

He mumbled, but I pretended not to hear. If he really wanted me to hear, he would’ve spoken louder.

“Why do you keep turning red? What’s got you so worked up?”

“I’m not upset.”

“Then, is it embarrassment? Are you really in puberty?”

“Are you seriously asking because you don’t know?”

I paused, then answered honestly without much thought.

I had no reason to hide it.

“I don’t understand people’s emotions well. It’s hard for me to read them.”

“…”

“It makes life easy, but it’s hard to fit into society.”

Helios stared at me like he forgot he was supposed to pull away.

“So, as your teacher, please understand. And yes, I’m forcing you to.”

“…So you really don’t know why I’ve been acting weird lately?”

“…Huh? You never said anything, so how would I know?”

“….”

Helios let out a deep sigh and looked annoyed. See? He was upset.

Then he gently lowered my hand from his head and rubbed his face.

“Haah…”

“Just say it now. I’ll listen. Why have you been acting so weird? Don’t bottle it up.”

Checking on Helios’s emotional state was important too. I raised him well—it’d be a waste if he broke down before reaching the top.

“First of all… I’m not angry or upset.”

He said that with a rebellious face, but I nodded anyway.

“It’s just… I admire you.”