Chapter 10
“Edwin, what on earth are you talking about?”
“What? Did you not hear me clearly? Reina, I will marry you. You should be grateful that I am not casting you out. However, I want you to enter the palace as a concubine, not the Crown Princess.”
I was momentarily speechless at his sheer brazenness. I stared at Edwin, utterly dazed.
In my previous life, Edwin had been a radiant flower to me. His brilliant silver hair and eyes that sparkled like molten gold made him look as noble as a white lily.
But even a lily is nothing more than a withered, unsightly weed once it rots. That was exactly what he was to me now.
“I do not understand why you are making such a demand, Edwin.”
“What?”
“Do you not remember? You were the one who asked for this engagement. Furthermore, how can you unilaterally break a promise made between our two families?”
“But you were the one who accepted my proposal. Therefore, you should be the one to step back.”
I take it back—I shouldn’t call him a flower. A flower is still a flower even when it rots, but he was currently nothing more, and nothing less, than a piece of wretched filth.
“As your fiancée, I have strived to never bring shame upon you. Even if you hated me, I remained faithfully by your side. And yet, you ask me to be the one to suggest breaking the engagement?”
“I’m telling you I’ll still marry you, aren’t I?”
“As a concubine?”
“Yes! You aren’t even the true daughter of Marquis Elvain anyway!” Edwin shouted, as if he could no longer contain himself.
Even though it wasn’t a lie and was a fact known to everyone, I reflexively fell silent. Even if I no longer held any feelings for Edwin, having my entire life negated once again felt truly horrific.
Realizing his slip of the tongue too late, he covered his mouth, then frowned and drove the point home.
“That was a mistake.”
“…Please leave.”
“I said it was a mistake! Besides, we aren’t finished talking!”
“I don’t wish to speak further. Please, just leave.”
When I adamantly refused, Edwin’s face turned beet-red with rage as he bellowed.
“I am apologizing, Reina! Accept my apology this instant and do as I say!”
“Is this an apology? To merely call it a mistake—is that what passes for an apology from Your Highness?”
I should have pretended to cry to deceive him, but I felt so disgusted that anger surged instead, causing my expression to harden.
“Then what, do you expect me, the Crown Prince of the Empire, to bow my head to you? You are truly narrow-minded to refuse a proper apology.”
Edwin pointed a finger at me, then stomped toward the door, splashing water everywhere. Every time he took a step, a wet footprint was left on the carpet, which was incredibly unpleasant.
Slam!
Edwin slammed the door so hard that the entire room vibrated. I looked up at the sound of glass clinking; the crystal ornaments on the chandelier were swaying violently from the impact, making a chaotic noise.
“Sigh.”
I let out a heavy breath, and only then did Leonhardt, who had missed his chance to leave the room, come into view.
“If it isn’t urgent, could we speak tomorrow, Leon?”
“…Understood. My apologies. Please, get some rest.”
I thought he was leaving, but he suddenly stopped and turned around.
“Would you perhaps be able to spare some time tomorrow?”
“Regrettably, I cannot give you an answer. As you can see, I am exhausted right now.”
“I understand. I will send someone in the evening to ask again.”
With a polite bow, he made a quick exit and closed the door behind him.
“Phew.”
Once I was completely alone in the bedroom, the doctor—who had been waiting outside under Leonhardt’s orders—entered with Ella, looking hesitant.
“I heard you injured your leg, My Lady.”
“I did.”
The maid who brought the doctor inside had a look of sheer bewilderment on her face.
“My Lady, is there anything else I can help with?”
“Could you clean the room? There is so much water everywhere, it’s unpleasant.”
“Of course.”
Thus, I had my sprained ankle treated by the doctor while the maid brought in other servants to wipe away every trace of water from the room.
When evening came, Leonhardt sent a messenger, but I declined his request and continued to rest without eating dinner.
Everything was just so tiresome.
“I am so sad to see you leave again today.”
In my previous life, my foster mother had never said she was sad to say goodbye. I stared at her in silence, finding it strange that she was suddenly showing concern for me.
Before leaving the Marquis’s estate, I was saying my goodbyes to my foster parents in the Marquess’s study. I sat in the seat of honor while they sat across from me, looking at me with affectionate expressions, just as they had before Josefina appeared.
It felt bizarre. They hadn’t been this doting since Josefina was found.
Perhaps because the plan to poison my sister had gone awry, they were trying to treat me like their own child again? A small spark of hope flickered in my chest.
“Your hands are cold.”
My foster mother took my hand with her own, warmed by the teacup, sharing her heat. As I quietly felt her touch, I blinked, catching a scent that drifted past my nose.
“This isn’t black tea. Did you get a new blend?”
The scent of the tea poured before me was unfamiliar. My foster mother smiled brightly.
“It’s cinnamon tea. I thought it would be good for you to take some back to the Imperial Palace.”
“Indeed. I heard cinnamon tea warms the body. You’ve always had a cold constitution. Though we can no longer be together, we wanted to look after you in this small way.”
With even my foster father chiming in with concern, I fell into the illusion that things had returned to the way they used to be. Suddenly, I remembered the past, shortly after I was first adopted into the Marquis’s family. Back then, I found the sprawling estate so fascinating that I would run around all day, exploring every nook and cranny.
“You mustn’t run, Reina.”
“I’m sorry.”
At the time, I thought they said that because they didn’t want me behaving in an un-noble manner.
“If you fall, it breaks Mama’s heart. So please, don’t run.”
My foster mother had been such a kind person. Until Josefina returned.
Did she change because Josefina came back? Even if Josefina was there, surely their affection for me wasn’t so shallow that they could turn cold in an instant.
Though they were frigid now, looking back at my previous life, they hadn’t directly harmed me like Edwin and Josefina had.
“Thank you. I will drink it often at the palace while thinking of you both.”
“Not at all. We are the ones who are sorry we cannot look after you more often.”
“Yes. It makes me shamelessly happy to hear you say that.”
It was hard to look at them because it had been so long since I’d seen those warm, smiling eyes. My reflection in the teacup looked like a mess, so I quickly pulled my hands away to wipe my eyes.
“Come to think of it, it has already been four years since you entered the palace.”
Suddenly, my foster mother changed the subject with a wistful expression. As she said, I had lived in the Imperial Palace since I was sixteen, receiving education to become the Crown Princess. Thus, I spent most of the year there, visiting the Marquis’s estate only occasionally during winter or summer with the Emperor’s permission.
“So, I’ve been giving it some thought.”
Whenever Mother had a favor to ask, she would clasp her hands neatly and look me straight in the eye before beginning. Just like she was doing now.
“How I might be able to look after you from your side.”
She let out a sigh and continued.
“What do you think about taking Pippi (Josefina) as your lady-in-waiting?”
“Pardon?”
I reflexively questioned the unexpected proposal and followed up hurriedly.
“Mother, didn’t you say Sister Josefina would become the next Marquess Elvain?”
“Yes. That is why I want her to learn many things by working in the palace before then. And I thought you wouldn’t be as lonely in the palace if Pippi were with you.”
“But a lady-in-waiting is strictly my subordinate. How could I possibly give orders and instructions to my own sister?”
As I showed my reluctance, Mother gripped both my hands tightly and pleaded.
“Reina, Pippi has been wandering outside all this time without a proper education. Even if she becomes the Young Marquess, everyone in high society might look down on her. Pippi says there is much she wants to learn at the palace, too.”
“…”
“It was just Pippi’s birthday the other day, Reina. Consider it a birthday present to your sister and accept her as your lady-in-waiting for just one year.”
A hollow laugh escaped me. It was absurd to see her clinging to me, even bringing up Josefina’s birthday. I stiffened my expression and fell silent.
It made me even angrier that she acted like someone who knew my birthday only in theory but never actually remembered it.
“Choosing your ladies-in-waiting is entirely your prerogative, is it not?”
I found my foster mother’s persistence even more ridiculous in the face of my cold reaction, so I deliberately chose not to answer.
“Pippi just wants to help you. You know how kind our Pippi is. It seems she is worried about you.”
Sister isn’t worried about me; she just wants to be near Edwin.
It seemed Mother wouldn’t back down until I agreed. I had no choice but to pull my hands away again and speak.
“As you well know, Mother, the Imperial Palace is like walking on thin ice. A single small mistake there can cost a life. Wouldn’t it be dangerous to take Sister inside?”
“You can protect her. You are the noble woman who will become the Crown Princess, so surely you can protect your sister. I believe in you.”
My foster mother was undeterred by my persuasion.
Regardless of my hatred for bringing Josefina into the palace, it was indeed a dangerous place. Every day felt precarious, as if walking on a razor-sharp blade. Even if I filled my circle with only the most carefully selected people, it wouldn’t be enough. Taking my sister along, just like before, was too dangerous.
If it were Josefina, she would surely target me even more in that environment.
“…I understand. I will think about it.”
I nodded to my foster parents as if I had no choice. Of course, I only planned to think about it. I figured if I kept delaying, she would eventually give up on her own.
“Thank you, Reina.”
Even though it wasn’t an acceptance, my foster mother looked as happy as if I were taking Josefina with me, her eyes welling with tears.
“I’ve talked far too much about myself. Hurry and drink your tea. It’s getting cold.”
“I really must be going now, Mother. I’ll drink the tea next time I visit.”
Mother once again offered the cup of cinnamon tea with a smile. However, I waved it off and hurriedly left the study. For some reason, I felt as though I would never be able to drink cinnamon tea again.
They say the ground hardens after the rain. Since my regression, my heart had hardened with the rain of disappointment, becoming so firm that it seemed it could never be softened again.
The disappointment of having trusted such people as family, and the self-loathing for almost leaning on them again, solidified my heart.
“What took you so long?”
“Oh, my apologies. I’ve kept you waiting, Edwin.”
After shaking off my foster parents, who insisted on seeing me off, I saw the carriage sent by the Imperial Family. Edwin, who had insisted on waiting for me, was already seated inside.
It is basic etiquette to offer a hand to a lady boarding a carriage, but he seemed to have no intention of showing such consideration, so I had to climb in myself.
“Ugh…”
As luck would have it, the ankle I had injured yesterday throbbed, and I nearly fell forward as I lost my balance. However, I managed to steady myself and take my seat, causing his scowl to deepen.
“To think you can’t even board a carriage properly. Truly pathetic.”
I forced a smile at Edwin, who looked at me with contempt, and he snorted and turned his head away. I also gazed out the opposite window to avoid giving him a reason to pick another fight.
We spent the uncomfortable journey in total silence.
The scenery outside looked like delicate watercolors or blurred oil paintings depending on the speed of the carriage; it wasn’t half bad. In fact, as long as Edwin was sitting across from me, anything—even trash—would probably look beautiful by comparison.
“…What did Marquis Elvain say?”
Edwin was the first to break the silence.
“He didn’t say much.”
“I’m asking what you talked about.”
Despite my answer, Edwin was persistent. Did he want an answer to the threat he made yesterday? Judging by his reaction, it seemed he and Josefina had already reached an agreement.
If that were the case, they wouldn’t have used my foster mother to bring up the lady-in-waiting issue. Was he bringing it up on purpose?
Various suspicions crossed my mind, but since there was no need to share this matter with Edwin, I pretended to be ignorant and answered with a different topic.
“He told me to always keep warm at the palace since my body is cold.”
“…I see.”
Edwin’s interest seemed to vanish at my reply, and he turned his gaze back outside.
The road back to the Imperial Palace should have felt long, but it passed too quickly. Perhaps it was because of the discomfort I felt around Edwin, or perhaps it was the dread of having to see the difficult Emperor.
As soon as I arrived at the palace, I had to have an audience with the Emperor alongside Edwin. I wanted to run away, using the excuse that he was busy, but the Emperor’s attendant had personally come out to wait for us.
As I walked down the palace corridors following the attendant, my previous life suddenly flashed before me, making my chest feel tight.
“How could you do such a horrific thing! Why! Do you even have the intention of becoming the Crown Princess? How dare you bring such disgrace upon my face!”
“Your Majesty, I…!”
“Do not even think of making excuses! I heard everything from the Prince!”
In that life, I had entered the palace safely without being framed. However, Leonhardt had betrayed me. The Emperor, in a fit of rage, had treated me like a criminal and interrogated me. In the end, I had collapsed from the strain.
I felt wronged and miserable. And the fear of the Emperor that had been carved into my soul back then was still shackling me even now, as I vowed my revenge.
“Haa…”
“Lady Elvain, are you feeling unwell? If it is too difficult, I will ask His Majesty to keep the audience brief so you may rest.”
I had let out a sigh to try and ease my tension, but it only seemed to make my chest feel tighter. The attendant walking ahead stopped and asked me.
“Now you’re even sighing just to get attention.”
Ignoring Edwin’s nonsense, I shook my head at the attendant to indicate I was fine and continued walking. Perhaps because I wasn’t walking arm-in-arm with Edwin, I could manage the walk despite the nausea.
“Reina, come here.”
As we arrived in front of the audience chamber and the attendant announced our visit, Edwin offered his arm with a look of extreme displeasure. It was to present the image of a devoted couple to the Emperor.
Before long, we were granted permission to enter and headed inside. The marble floors and mahogany doors of the audience chamber were incredibly lavish. Not to mention the opulent chandelier. The Emperor was a miser, but he never spared any expense when it came to flaunting his power.
Beyond that, the Emperor was visible. He sat on the throne, looking down at us, and spoke in a slow, languid tone.
“Both of you look just as healthy as when you left the palace. It truly gladdens me. Did the Crown Princess have a good visit to her family home?”
“Yes, Your Majesty. Thank you truly for allowing me to see my parents.”
“Raise your head and look at me. Reina, as my expectations for you are high, this is the least I can do for my future Crown Princess.”
As I raised my head with the Emperor’s permission, my eyes met his. His golden eyes, so like Edwin’s, were like those of a bird of prey. Except that bird was a vulture that only ate rotting meat.
“So, did you and Edwin get your dresses fitted properly? As the Crown Princess, you could have summoned a tailor to the palace, but you are quite frugal.”
“Yes. However, I humbly report that I do not believe I will be wearing that dress.”
“Crown Princess, what on earth is this preposterous talk?”
At my answer, the Emperor frowned and shifted in his seat to press me further.
“Your Majesty, how can I dare to speak like this in your presence? Please, punish me for failing to properly assist the Crown Prince!”
“Crown Princess, even if you are not yet formally married to Edwin, you know well that the entire Empire considers you the future Empress. I shall not punish you, so speak the truth.”
“Your Majesty, I…! Your grace is as vast as the sea, and I am overwhelmed that you would pity me so! I shall speak, though I am ashamed.”
“…”
“Prince Edwin has told me that he intends to make Sister Josefina the Crown Princess and asked me to become his concubine. I have a small heart and no one to lean on, so I had no choice but to report this to Your Majesty! Please, punish me!”
As soon as my confession ended, the Emperor glared at Edwin with eyes full of rage. The veins on the fist he used to strike the armrest of the throne were bulging.
“Crown Princess, is this all true? Crown Prince, is what the Crown Princess says the truth? What sort of madness is this!”
“Your Majesty, that is not all! The Crown Prince was almost poisoned at the Marquis’s estate, and I was insufficient and failed to prevent it!”
“…Reina!”
“Furthermore, no one wished to protect the Crown Prince… I alone insisted that we must find the culprit to protect him, but I had no power…”
“That’s not it, Your Majesty! Please listen to me!”
“Silence! Be quiet, Crown Prince! I have much more to hear from the Crown Princess!”
With tears glistening in my eyes, I looked at the Emperor and cried out about the atrocities of Edwin and Josefina. Then, adding in a trembling voice, I lowered my head as if struggling.
“On the day of Sister Josefina’s birthday banquet, there was poison in the wine that the Crown Prince and I drank.”
The Emperor cherished Edwin dearly. Like the apple of his eye, his greatest pride.
