Chapter 1
I was truly one of the unluckiest people alive.
Abandoned by my parents as a child, I was sent to an orphanage and had to leave as soon as I turned nineteen. Somehow, I scraped by through high school, paying tuition with part-time wages, and clawed my way to college, graduating with a full scholarship thanks to my grades.
I had no student loans because I was supported here and there, but at twenty-three, I was finally excited at the thought of living freely.
After suffocating through life, I had finally reached some stability.
Because I had gotten a job at G Corporation, one of the biggest companies, without any special connections!
The tension I felt during the interview was indescribable. Breathing felt like I might cough up my heart. But all the blood, sweat, and tears I poured in paid off when I beat out hundreds of competitors.
And the joy of knowing I achieved it with my own two hands—there was nothing like it!
On top of that!
“The winning numbers for round 929 are 7, 9, 12, 15, 19, 23 + 4.”
They matched my numbers exactly, not a single digit different!
A big corporate job and first place in the lottery!
Even though I grew up parentless, thanks to the orphanage director who cared for me and the nun who occasionally taught me piano, my life wasn’t as miserable as it could have been.
I believed one day my efforts would bloom.
But I didn’t know that flower would crumble like this.
They say life is a flower.
Maybe mine was just a weed.
“Kyaaah!”
“Miss, are you okay?”
“Oh my goodness, what happened here!”
I hit my head hard, but strangely, it didn’t hurt. My body wouldn’t move, yet the voices around me were growing distant, and I was pulled into a strange sensation, as if I were dreaming.
It was like being fully conscious but drowsy, like after taking sleeping pills.
“That lady must’ve fallen from above!”
Apparently, someone had fallen on top of me.
Really, after twenty-three years of bad luck, clawing my way through life, in the end…
Not hit by a car. Not struck by lightning.
But killed by a falling person.
F***. What a pathetic, shitty life.
“Gasp!”
What a ridiculous dream!
But then again, the place I was lying in felt strange. I didn’t own a bed.
—Rustle, rustle—
The government housing I lived in was always noisy, but not like this. This was the sound of footsteps. And when I looked up, the ceiling above my bed had strange golden patterns embroidered on luxurious red silk. What the hell?!
“Huh? What the…?”
I looked around. The room wasn’t just big—it was massive. And the thing I was lying on really was a bed.
Not just any bed—huge, enormous, so big I could probably jump around like on a trampoline.
“What is this?”
Did the woman who fell on me take me home and set me up here as compensation?
If so, shouldn’t I be hooked up to an IV? But my arm had no needle marks.
Calm down… breathe…
“Wait, what was my name again?”
My head throbbed, but strangely, I couldn’t remember my name.
[Hello! ‘Player 2’ of The Princess’s Men!]
A bright blue screen popped up in front of me, and my mind went blank. The Princess’s Men?
I’d heard that name before. I couldn’t possibly have forgotten such an embarrassing title.
[‘Player 2’ is the second imperial princess of the Bastian Empire!]
Maybe it was because I’d cracked my head, or maybe I really had memory issues, but the throbbing was getting worse. The blue window scrolled on its own, showing the next lines without me clicking.
[▼ But, since you are not a legitimate player, you cannot fully access target information.]
What is this? A dream?
[You must be wondering why you appeared here.]
What the hell…
[If you win this game, you will be granted one wish. No matter what it is. For example: “Make me richer than Bill Gaytes!” That’s possible too.
Also, as Player 2, you may use the status window ☆with limitations☆—so please use it wisely to survive.]
“A survival game? You call it The Princess’s Men, but what’s with all this? And what do you mean by ‘not a legitimate player’?”
[You can win this game by achieving one of the following three outcomes:]
Wow, it ignored me.
[1. Kill Keira Fletcher Gabriella Bastian.
-
Depose Keira Fletcher Gabriella Bastian, and let Gracie Fletcher Gabriella Bastian become emperor.
-
Have Keira Fletcher Gabriella Bastian sincerely apologize to you.]
“Who the hell are Keira and Gracie?”
[Bonus! The status window has a soft heart! (Tears!)
Normally this isn’t allowed, but since Player 2 knows nothing, I will grant you some generosity.
▼ While beginner’s luck lingers, you may use the status window. (Applause!)
But only for one week!
If you want to extend the period, keep accepting quests.
Best of luck! ▼]
“Hey!”
[p.s. If you fail to execute a quest, a severe penalty will be imposed!
Also, rewards may vary—or not exist at all.]
Because it was written in Korean, it felt like some scammy unpaid internship trying to exploit me.
The blue window vanished.
Still wondering if this was a dream, I slapped myself across the cheek.
Smack! Smack!
Ow. Damn, that hurt.
The cheek I slapped was swelling, so I covered it with my hand and sat up in bed. This couldn’t be real. Surely it was just a dream. They said comatose patients sometimes hallucinate—this must be that.
“I just hope when I wake up, I can go back to work in one piece.”
I’d just gotten into a big company—getting injured and losing the job would be the worst.
Well, even if I’m not in one piece, the lottery prize is seven billion won! I don’t need to be as rich as Bill Gaytes—just give me my seven billion!
Knock knock
“May I enter, Your Highness?”
I’d never been treated preciously in my life. No wonder it showed up in a dream.
[Caroline
: Minor noble / Handmaiden of Princess Gracie
▼ Caroline fears your horribly melted face.]
The red status window felt ominous.
As I silently read it, Caroline entered, trembling as she spoke.
“Y-your bathwater, Princess…”
“Game over!”
…No response.
I looked at her calmly. Why was she trembling so much?
And if she wasn’t my servant, why did she come in here? Did she mistake the room? But then why was her status window red? It had been blue earlier.
Was I really going to live another life of endless confusion?
It’s just a dream anyway. Should I just act like a maniac?
But what if it’s a nightmare, like sleep paralysis, and I never wake up?
[Tip! From the kind-hearted status window ⚝
Your bathwater contains the following impurities: mercury, lead, cadmium… For more details, click ▼.]
I didn’t even need to click to know—no way.
When I stared at the basin she carried, her expression twisted as if she were looking at something hideous. Whatever hesitation I had melted away.
“Hey.”
“Y-yes?”
“That’s right. You.”
“Wh-why, Your Highness?”
“Hmm.”
Why did a princess only have one maid? Shouldn’t she have a whole group of attendants?
“You.”
“…Y-yes?”
“Drink it.”
“…Excuse me?”
Dream or not, I wasn’t about to lose. My life had always been a battlefield, and not once did I give up in that war. So why should I start losing now, even in a dream?
“I said drink it. Didn’t you hear me?”
