COTP 13

Chapter 13

“Please visit the temple from time to time. The sheet music dedicated to the divine statue must be piling up with dust… It would be nice if Your Grace could wipe it clean.”

At the specific request, the hand of the maid brushing my hair slid down quietly.

Her eyes reflected in the mirror trembled without rest.

I tilted my head in curiosity at her reaction.

“Why are you like this?”

“Your Grace…”

“Yes?”

“I… dare to ask a question of Your Grace. Do you truly… sincerely want to return to the kingdom?”

At the unexpected question, I blinked a few times.

Remembering the words my husband had said, I couldn’t answer right away. As I hesitated, the maid asked again.

“Do you have a special reason…?”

Her clear eyes brimmed with tears, leaving me bewildered.

“I… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t meddle in matters that happen inside the bedchamber… But I just can’t imagine the Royal Palace without Your Grace anymore… If you’re truly planning to leave…”

Overwhelmed by emotion, a tear rolled down her cheek.

“Please… take me with you.”

Her shoulders shook as she burst into sorrowful tears.

That strange, indescribable feeling that came over me was probably natural.

She and I had been together for six years.

As one of the chief maids of the Queen’s Palace, she had been by my side since the day I arrived in the duchy.

And yet, I had never expected this kind of reaction.

We had always kept a certain distance.

“I truly think Your Grace is a wonderful person. I want to serve you for the rest of my life. I will be with Your Grace anytime, anywhere.”

Suddenly, I felt a warmth spreading in a corner of my heart.

I gently patted the maid’s delicate shoulders.

“I… am not going anywhere.”

The maid raised her head sharply.

Her eyes, quickly reddened, seemed to desperately want to say something to me.

“I was just throwing a petty tantrum at Your Grace. Since Your Grace has refused, it’s a closed matter now. My life is here.”

“Truly?”

“Yes.”

I murmured the undeniable reality I couldn’t avoid.

“Even if I die… I will die in this duchy. Please don’t worry.”

“Is that a promise?”

“Yes.”

At my answer, the maid wiped away her tears.

In a trembling voice, she asked quietly.

“But… then why did you destroy the piano?”

“Just…”

I lowered my eyes.

“I wanted to do something I wanted for once.”

Largo… One of the things I had written down for you.

Number three: Live as myself.

Even if just for a short time, not as the “Seer,” not as the Duchess, not as the Western Princess of the Kingdom, but simply as me, as a single human being.

So the thing that defined me now had to be broken.

I felt like I couldn’t truly be myself unless that beautiful thing was gone.

From now on, until the day I die—soon—I will not offer praises to God again.

I drew a line on my first, humble wish that I had finally fulfilled.

Next, and the next, and the one after that…

I decided to be a little greedier.

“Then, what kind of ornament shall we use today?”

Perhaps she had gotten the answer she wanted.

The maid’s hands moved gently again, her tear-filled voice softening.

“How about black pearls? Ah, the Duke sent new lapis lazuli yesterday.”

As the maid struggled to steady her breath and smiled faintly, a small voice spoke.

“Your Grace, I’ve brought the rinsing water.”

A young maid, barely fifteen or sixteen years old, entered holding a tray and a small cup.

After placing the tray in its designated spot, the girl gazed at the back of my neck.

Her stare was blatant.

The maid picking out my accessories scolded her on my behalf.

“What kind of rudeness is this? Why are you holding your head so high!”

“Uh… well…”

Her words trailed off timidly.

The girl’s eyes, looking at the maid, wavered.

“My Lady… I’m not sure if I should say this but…”

“Hm?”

“I… I think the letters on the back of Her Grace’s neck… changed…”

I froze for a moment, lying in the maid’s hands.

Did this child remember?

This small phrase that changed little by little every day.

She saw the back of my neck only for less than five minutes each morning.

“Did God give another prophecy? I… I was just curious… I… Should I not have said that?”

Hearing her timid mumble, I turned my head, struck by sudden realization.

Only three people in each generation could see, hear, and recite the language of God.

Though it appeared pitch black, most people only saw it as a mess of meaningless lines.

Even I couldn’t clearly read it until I had awakened as a true “Seer.”

Only three people could recognize that these characters had “changed.”

As if possessed, I reached out.

My hand cut sharply through the air and grabbed the girl’s chin.

I faced her directly.

“Y… Your Grace?”

Innocent, bewildered eyes looked up at me—black as a mirror.

I must have worn an indescribable expression.

A face like a demon risen from hell, like a soul screaming in despair and ruin.

The air sank heavily. The girl’s trembling lips quivered, on the verge of tears.

“I… I’m sorry. Please forgive my rudeness.”

Her voice of apology sounded distant.

I could only lament, far away in my mind.

It’s you.

Ah… it’s you.

The new “Seer” God had chosen in my place.

The reason God now wished to take me back into His arms.

The one slowly erasing me from this world.

“Why…”

I muttered stupidly.

I couldn’t put into words the storm of emotions boiling inside me.

Why are you here… by my side?

Soon, you too will naturally see what God says.

Not just noticing the change, but reading it and proclaiming it to the world.

In my place, just as I had done.

In a world without me.

“No… it’s fine… I’m not angry, so don’t worry.”

Releasing her chin, I murmured blankly.

She was barely sixteen, about the same age I had been when I first became the “Seer.”

She had no idea what lay ahead for her.

I could only repeat to myself:

The day you realize what you are… I’ll have to leave this life.

But none of that will ever be your fault. Not even by the smallest bit.

“Yes… God’s message to me has changed.”

Her very existence now brought me new, painful contemplation.

I looked back at the two maids, frozen by the brief moment.

Instead of making them more uncomfortable with an apology, I spoke as gently as I could.

“Shall we go boating around lunchtime?”

“Boating?”

The maid brushing my hair finally spoke.

Clutching her chest in relief, she seemed truly sorry for worrying me so much.

“What has brought this on, Your Grace?”

“I’ve been neglecting everyone, holed up in the temple all this time.”

Facing her, I smiled as brightly as I could.

My face muscles pulled awkwardly at this unfamiliar expression.

“I want to start doing things… more fitting for a duchess.”

For the short time I have left… even just a little.

Ah… Largo.

I just want to live these moments… without regret.

Every minute, every second… so very precious.

The weather was clear.

Floating a boat on the deep blue lake, listening to the maids’ laughter while sitting on the lawn, I heard it.

“It seems Her Grace is having a change of heart.”

Having heard the news, he suddenly appeared.

Everyone bowed their heads to him.

“Your Grace, the Duke.”

“We greet Your Grace.”

Nodding lightly to them, he turned to look at me.

“It’s the first time I’ve seen Your Grace enjoying such leisure.”

It was true.

Even I found this time unfamiliar.

“When I think of Your Grace… I always imagine you under the divine light in the temple, offering your praises to God.”

At that moment, I realized.

Perhaps all along, this had been his grievance.

That the Queen had secluded herself in the temple, neglecting her duties.

Thinking from his perspective, it wouldn’t have been welcome at all.

Does death make people wiser?

I was only now understanding this obvious thing.

“By the way…”

His lips curled into a crooked smile.

“Since you destroyed it, I suppose you can’t play anymore, can you?”