Chapter 23
Alesia spoke to Sarah with a stern expression.
“Sarah, you’re the only person I trust in the Imperial Palace. I hope you never keep secrets from me. Otherwise… I think I’d feel too lonely.”
“Milady…”
Alesia let go of Sarah’s hand, looking disappointed.
“If you don’t want to talk, you don’t have to. I won’t force you.”
“No, I’ll tell you.”
Sarah made a determined face. After hesitating for a moment, she turned and picked up a medicine bottle.
She handed it to Alesia and opened her mouth to speak.
“The truth is… I called the palace physician.”
“And?”
“That’s all. There’s nothing else I’m hiding.”
Alesia frowned at Sarah. Sarah, seeing her suspicious look, waved both hands as if to prove her innocence.
“Really, that’s it.”
“You were going to keep something as minor as a visit from the palace physician a secret? Why?”
“His Highness the Second Prince told me not to tell you about the physician. Not just today—he said not to mention it in the future either.”
Alesia narrowed her eyes and rolled the medicine bottle in her hand. The blue liquid inside the transparent glass sloshed gently.
Sarah nervously watched her reaction.
“I’m sorry. I should have prioritized your orders over the Prince’s, but I heard you were very sensitive about the topic of the physician, so I didn’t know what else to do.”
“…So I was.”
Alesia muttered bitterly.
She had thought the memories of her past life were buried away.
The pain of not being able to call a doctor, the betrayal she felt when Franz turned his back on her—none of that had happened in this life yet.
But just because something hasn’t happened doesn’t mean it never existed.
Alesia hadn’t freed herself from the pain of the past.
She gently placed her hand on her abdomen. Her fingertips trembled as she caressed the belly that had yet to bear life.
“Milady, what’s wrong? You don’t look well at all. I shouldn’t have said anything. What should I do…”
Sarah jumped to her feet in a panic. As she turned to summon the physician again, Alesia quickly grabbed her arm.
“I’m fine, Sarah.”
“But—!”
“I really—”
“If she’s your person, you should trust her. Let her call the physician if necessary.”
Just as Alesia tried to soothe Sarah, another voice cut in.
They turned to see a man entering through the side door.
“Franz.”
Alesia frowned the moment she recognized him.
“So this is something I’ll have to get used to now? I never realized being royalty meant having no privacy.”
She gritted her teeth as she spoke.
Part of her wanted to nail that door shut. Franz frequently used that door to barge in, and it irritated her to no end.
“At the very least, you could knock.”
“I did. Twice.”
Franz answered calmly as he approached the bed. Hearing his footsteps draw nearer, Alesia gripped the bedsheets tightly.
As he came closer, his scent wafted over her—cool and refreshing, like an oak forest. It wrapped around her.
Alesia ignored the alluring fragrance and spoke.
“You’re the reason I couldn’t trust Sarah. Why did you make her keep the physician a secret? You even gagged one of my own people.”
Franz sat on the edge of the bed, causing the mattress to sink slightly. Instead of answering, he looked over at Sarah.
Catching his gaze, Sarah flinched.
When he gave her a slight nod, she bowed and backed out of the room.
Even after the door closed, a heavy silence lingered between them.
“I didn’t exactly gag her.”
Just as the silence became suffocating, Franz let out a sigh and finally spoke. He stared at the bottle in Alesia’s hand and continued.
“I just wanted to keep the number of people who knew about what happened yesterday as small as possible.”
Alesia scoffed.
“So you kept it secret from the person it happened to?”
“…You were the last person I wanted to know.”
Franz’s expression twisted in pain. He reached out and gently took the medicine bottle from her hand.
She watched as he placed it on the table and asked,
“Why?”
“…”
“Why was I the last person you wanted to tell?”
Her voice was calm, but there was clear rebuke beneath her tone.
Franz slowly turned his gaze toward her. She raised her eyes and looked directly at him.
Eyes the color of summer greenery stared into ones lit by the sun’s gold.
“This is my body. I should know what’s happening to it better than anyone else.”
Franz’s eyes, locked with hers, wavered slightly. As he tried to turn away, she grabbed him.
His large frame stiffened. His body went rigid with tension. But Alesia didn’t let go.
“Are you hiding anything else from me?”
“And if I am?”
Franz’s voice came out hoarse, full of bitterness, almost as if blaming her.
She was momentarily at a loss for words at his counter-question.
‘Who are you to be mad right now?’
Alesia bit her lower lip and spoke.
“If you are, then please tell me.”
“You’re that curious about what I’m hiding? I didn’t think you even cared about me.”
“I didn’t realize you wanted me to care.”
“You…”
Franz sighed at her pointed words. He ran a rough hand over his face and began to speak.
“No matter what I do, you’ll hate me. I’m just the shameless man trying to force you to be my bride. The one using you to neutralize my mana. You must find even touching me disgusting.”
His words came pouring out like a flood. Alesia listened and thought bitterly,
‘So he knows.’
Franz was more self-aware than she expected.
That surprised her—and annoyed her. It meant he understood her pain and still ignored it.
‘How disgusting.’
The more she learned about him, the worse she felt. Alesia looked at him with a cold gaze.
Franz took a deep breath and shook his head. Then he spoke in a low, resigned tone.
“There’s nothing I’m hiding.”
A rational glint returned to his eyes.
He continued, as if he hadn’t just poured his heart out seconds ago.
“I told her not to tell you about the physician to protect your dignity.”
His golden eyes darkened.
“The second prince’s fiancée collapsed while picking out her wedding dress and had to summon a palace physician—nothing good would come of people hearing that. I thought it’d be better if you didn’t know either.”
“You’re saying you did all this just to protect my dignity?”
“It doesn’t reflect well to summon the physician for someone not yet officially royal. I figured it’d only burden you, so I tried to be considerate.”
“Because my dignity is your dignity, you tried to handle it all without even telling me, right?”
At Alesia’s cold remark, Franz’s brows twitched. His eyes dug into her, analyzing her every word.
Just as she was about to look away, he tilted his chin arrogantly, as if confirming her suspicion.
“And if that’s true?”
“What?”
Alesia stared at him, dumbfounded.
She knew Franz Eustace was an arrogant man. But she didn’t know he held his reputation in such high regard.
“Why not just abandon me, then?”
Her words spilled out before she could stop them. She roughly shook off his hand and snapped at him.
“Forget someone as difficult as me. Go find someone obedient. A noblewoman from a prestigious family—someone who can uphold your precious image. I’m sure they’re lining up for the chance to be with the second prince.”
“…My mana stone only reacted to you.”
“Oh, the soul bond.”
At his low reply, Alesia let out a bitter laugh.
That damned bond. She was sick of hearing about it.
If it weren’t for mana—if it weren’t for that soul bond—none of this misery would’ve happened.
‘But no matter how many times I die and come back, that won’t change. It’s my fate.’
Alesia forced a smile, her lips curving with effort.
“Then let me give you another option.”
Her bloodshot eyes bore into Franz. Her voice trembled with fury.
“Keep your soul bond. And get a mistress. Someone elegant and noble, exactly your type. That way, you won’t have to worry about my reputation anymore. How’s that?”
As soon as she finished, flames lit in Franz’s eyes.
He grabbed her hand roughly and ground his teeth. His jaw trembled.
“That will never happen.”
His intense gaze pierced through her.
“There’s no woman for me but you. So stop hoping for something else.”
