~Chapter 05~
. Strange Kidnappers (4)
“Whoa… Black Panther!”
At his bold and reassuring proposal, Gwangpae smiled and laid a hand on his shoulder.
“Since the day I met you, I’ve never found you this reliable. Well then, do you have the ingredients?”
“Who do you think I am? Ever since we set out on this journey, I’ve been carrying rice and dried food with me.”
“Excellent. Go on then, show us what you’ve got.”
“Yes, big brother!”
With Gwangpae’s praise and expectant gaze all on him, Black Panther began unpacking his things to prepare baby food.
“Let’s see… there’s no pot, of course… hmm, a rice bowl will do.”
“……”
“Water… this much should do, right? Since the rice is about this much… yeah, this much water?”
Unlike when he had proudly pulled out the ingredients, his face was now dead serious as he chewed his lips, mixing(?) things together.
And then, after a while—
A burning smell spread, followed quickly by Black Panther’s curses.
“Damn it! Why’s only the bottom burnt? The top looks okay though—ugh! ptooey! No, not okay! Damn it all!”
“……”
“Ahh… this isn’t as easy as I thought. Big brother, this isn’t something just anyone can make.”
“Sigh…”
“…Brother.”
While Gwangpae pressed his hand to his forehead with a long sigh, Baekryeong’s calm voice entered his ear.
“I’ll try making it.”
“…You, Baekryeong?”
“Yes.”
Though Gwangpae’s tone held doubt, Baekryeong simply nodded once and stepped forward.
“Hii…”
“…Ooh.”
“He’s sleeping, sleeping.”
The baby, whose belly was round and full from eating Baekryeong’s food, giggled in Gwangpae’s arms before drifting off to sleep.
Watching the scene, Black Panther turned to Baekryeong with a new look.
“When did you learn to make baby food?”
“It’s not baby food. It’s rice porridge.”
“Fine, porridge then. When did you learn to make porridge?”
“That was…”
“……”
“…a long time ago.”
“You little punk?”
As if asking are you kidding me right now?, Black Panther glared, but Baekryeong turned away with annoyance.
“You know I was an assassin. I learned then.”
“Assassins learn how to make porridge these days?”
“I don’t know about these days. Back in my time, we learned it.”
“Still playing word games, huh? Do I look like Seokdu to you?”
“Why him?”
Realizing he’d just been dragged into it, Seokdu frowned, and Black Panther, still salty about what happened at the doctor’s house, snapped at him.
“Stay out of this, idiot. Can’t you see we’re talking?”
“You called my name. You’re the idiot.”
“That wasn’t—!”
“Enough.”
As their bickering grew heated, Gwangpae, who had been silently listening, cut in with a low voice.
“Stop it, all three of you. You’ll wake the baby.”
“Ugh…”
“Yes, brother.”
“Yes, big brother.”
Black Panther groaned reluctantly, while Seokdu and Baekryeong obeyed without hesitation.
With everyone quieted, Gwangpae rose with the baby in his arms.
“From now on, Baekryeong’s in charge of the baby’s meals. You’re the only one who knows how to make porridge.”
“Yes, brother.”
“Alright, let’s move out. The baby’s fed, he’s not crying anymore, and we can reach the estate without—”
“Waaaah!”
“Ah, damn it. What now?”
Just as they were about to leave, the baby cried again. Gwangpae sighed and checked him.
His belly was round, so he wasn’t hungry. His face was healthy, not sickly.
He’d been eating and sleeping well—so why were his arms so warm…? Warm?
“…Brother.”
Black Panther frowned as he sniffed the baby in Gwangpae’s arms.
“Don’t you smell something?”
“……”
“…I think he pooped.”
“…Damn it.”
As much as Gwangpae didn’t want to accept it, the foul smell and the heat against his arm confirmed Black Panther’s suspicion.
“Hey! Somebody take him and wash—”
Whoosh!
“…You bastards?”
Before he even finished, both Black Panther and Baekryeong had already leapt more than ten yards away. Only Seokdu remained, staring back at him.
“…Why didn’t you run?”
“Why would I?”
“The baby pooped.”
“He’s a baby. Babies poop. Adults don’t… right?”
“……”
“…Or do adults poop too?”
As Seokdu tilted his head innocently, Gwangpae couldn’t help but smile.
“Doesn’t matter. So, you’re fine with it?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Then you go wash him.”
“No.”
“…What? Why not? You just said you’re fine.”
“You’ve been the only one holding the baby all this time. And now I’m just supposed to wash him? Let me hold him too.”
“……”
“Otherwise, you do it yourself.”
…Maybe this idiot isn’t an idiot after all.
He’d barely ever spoken, but now he was laying out arguments with surprising logic. He must really have wanted to hold the baby.
Suppressing a wry smile, Gwangpae tried to coax him.
“I only kept him with me because it might be dangerous. Wouldn’t the baby be more comfortable with someone who already has experience?”
“Why would it be dangerous with me?”
“Well, that’s because you—”
Because you’re the worst at controlling your strength.
But before Gwangpae could finish, Seokdu shook his head and interrupted.
“Anyway, I want to hold him. I’ll carry him all the way to the estate.”
“You’ll carry the baby… all the way?”
“If you don’t like it, forget it. I don’t care.”
Seokdu turned as if it was no loss to him, forcing Gwangpae to grab his thick arm with a smile.
“You can hold him at feeding times.”
“…Only at feeding times?”
“…And when changing diapers.”
“Deal.”
Seemingly satisfied with the compromise, Seokdu curled his lips into a half-smile and carefully took the baby.
Humming happily, he headed for the riverbank to wash the baby, while the others followed nervously.
Despite their worries, Seokdu handled the baby with surprising gentleness.
He cradled him securely in his strong arms, cleaned his bottom at the riverbank, and even washed the dirty diaper, drying it neatly with his inner energy.
With someone on diapers, someone on meals, and someone on food gathering, their journey went smoothly after that.
They almost hit a snag when the food ran out, but Black Panther returned swiftly with supplies after Gwangpae ordered him to “take responsibility.”
“How’d you get rice and vegetables in the mountains?”
“I borrowed them.”
“Borrowed? From who, in the middle of nowhere?”
“Bandits.”
“……”
“No need to return it. They can’t report it anyway.”
…Fair enough.
It’s not like bandits could complain to the authorities that their den got robbed.
Well, he really is ex-bandit material.
And so, with Black Panther in charge of food, Baekryeong of porridge, and Seokdu of diapers, the Black Heavenly Demons managed to reach their destination—the estate in Heungbuk, Mokpo—after three full days.
Whoosh.
Caw, caw.
The chilly mountain wind blew through their hair, damp with sweat. On the estate’s rooftops, countless crows perched and cawed noisily, as if demanding to know why strangers had trespassed.
“Those damn crows…”
“Should I kill them?”
At Gwangpae’s twitching brow, Baekryeong eagerly asked. After a brief thought, Gwangpae nodded.
“Drive them out.”
“Yes, brother.”
Whoosh!
“…He’s having fun.”
Was he just eager for a bit of action?
Black Panther clicked his tongue as Baekryeong darted across the rooftops, throwing daggers with silver threads attached.
“Seriously? You’re using the Black Flash Throwing Knife just to hunt crows? Are you insane?”
While Baekryeong leapt about gleefully, Gwangpae gestured toward Seokdu.
“Open the main gate. We’re going in.”
“Yes, brother.”
Seokdu landed before the gate and shoved.
Clunk.
“…Huh?”
Clunk, clunk.
BANG!
Crash!
When it wouldn’t budge, he lost his temper and punched it, breaking the rusted hinges and shattering the gate.
The loud crash startled the baby in Gwangpae’s arms.
“Waaaah!”
“Damn it, why’s everything so noisy? Now he’s awake—wait. Awake?”
He blinked in surprise. He’d always sealed the baby’s pressure points to keep him asleep while traveling fast—so how had he woken up already?
Did I make a mistake? Or… is this kid some rare constitution too?
The Sword God had been born with the Infinite Body, so who’s to say his child would be normal?
As Gwangpae entered the estate, he checked the baby’s pulse again.
But what met their eyes were chest-high weeds and cobwebs covering every corner of the estate.
Gwangpae stopped in his tracks. Black Panther, following behind, froze too.
“Brother.”
“…What?”
“…This is just a haunted house, isn’t it?”
He’d spoken aloud the very thought in Gwangpae’s mind.
“Are we… really going to live here?”
The plea in Black Panther’s voice practically begged him to say no.
Gwangpae hesitated, tempted to change plans—but how could he? After three days and nights of insisting they come here, he couldn’t just admit he’d been wrong.
“…We’ll clean it up first.”
With that decision, both Black Panther and Seokdu let out long, heavy sighs.
“This is our home now.”
And so, the Black Heavenly Demons—wanderers who’d roamed the Central Plains for decades—finally chose to settle down.
